True love has many shades
by Casophia
Summary: What if Ana had left Christian, after that hurtful scene in the playroom involving a belt, and had decided to just give up on him for good? Would that be the end of their earth shattering love story or would it bring up emotions that were, until that moment, unknown to both of them? - I guess you'll have to wait and see ;)
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

* * *

I realize it is a small chapter, but I just wanted to get some feedback before showing you what I have hidden for you! Hope you guys like it ;)

****** Ana *****

_Count Anastasia!_

" NOOOO!"

I wake, sweating bullets and screaming my lungs out, again! Since leaving him two days ago, sleeping does nothing to numb the feeling I have inside, the pain and confusion in my head rivals constantly with the burning agony from my broken heart.

"How could he do this to me?!"

I cry out, heartbroken and just plain old miserable with the awful turn my life had taken. Suddenly I found myself being devoured by a constant dark shadow, one that just swept away everything good in my life and has left a trail of loneliness and painful memories.

How can someone be, at the same time, your entire reason to live and the very reason you no longer feel like breathing? How can someone claim to care for you and just pull up a freaking belt and spank the living shit out of you and make you count!

And for what? So he could feel in control of me and my body and get some twisted pleasure from all that? I just don't understand, and quite frankly, I don't want to!

"Christian Grey is a fucking asshole and he will never put his disgusting hands on me, or any other 'tool' he prefers, ever again!"

I say it with such fury in my voice one would actually believe it, but I know otherwise, and deep down, beneath all the anger and pain I feel, a very big part of me feels desperate to reunite with the one man I ever truly love, despite all his fucked up fifty shades.

"No! Stop it Ana! Be strong!"

And with that convincing statement, I pull myself from bed and step into my bathroom, hoping to take a very long and relaxing shower, only to realize that the previous playroom scene would leave my behind bruised and damaged for a few more days.

"Shit! Now I have a bruised ass to go along with my damaged soul! Thanks a lot Grey!"

I spit between grinding teeth! Not a good way to start my day but it will have to do, because today I had decided to throw myself at work and I wasn't letting anything stop me from doing just that.

And as soon as I step out of the shower and wrap my body in my fluffy towel, the sound of the door bell gets me by surprise.

"It's 7.30 am, who the hell could that be?" I yell, only to swallow hard two seconds later and beg to myself "Please, please! Anyone but you."

After five seconds of just standing still, petrified, I give myself a mental nudge, grab my purple robe and walk towards the door, breathing deeply and slowly. When I finally open the door, I immediately regret it.

"What the fuck are you doing here?!"

I yell out, not caring at all for the surprised look of the person in front of me.

"Hello Anastasia. I'm sorry to disturb you, you obviously have somewhere to be, but I just couldn't wait any longer. We need to have a little chat, if you don't mind."

And with that, the fucking bitch troll storms inside my home, uninvited and poises herself in the middle of my living room, every bit of her blond, gorgeous self dominating the damn room.

Fuck! I hate this woman, and now she's in my house and I feel like a little girl not knowing what to do with myself.

"I have nothing to say to you Elena!"

I manage to blurt out, trying to settle my nerves before I make myself do something that would, without a doubt, make me feel better and much more relaxed, punch that damn grin of her fucking face.

"You know, I never really understood what he saw in you, and now, seeing you like this I find myself even more confused. You are so ordinary, to say the least, that the only reason that makes sense to me is that you might actually be a good submissive. But even that seems unlikely given your feisty nature and youy annoying mouth. So tell me Anastasia, what do you have, or think you have, to make Christian so smitten by you?"

She looks truly confused and is now waiting for my answer.

Well, I think now it's as good a time as ever to tell her what you feel about her, don't you think Ana? And I agree with my inner goddess. It's on.

"You see Elena, I've been meaning to say this to you for some time now, so in a sense I'm glad you barged in my home uninvited and confronted me because here it is. Christian feels for me something he could never feel for a disgusting pervert excuse of a woman such as yourself, he cares for me. One might say, that in his fucked up way, he actually loves me. But you? You are nothing more than the crazy bitch who took his childhood away and turned him in the twisted fucked up man he his today. If it wasn't for you, he would have grown up to be a normal caring man, but now, he's just so screwed up that he cannot let anyone in without a freaking NDA or a damn contract. So to answer your question, i just gave him what he truly needed all along, love. Pure and simple. And with that I'm done. Get the heel out of my house and never speak to me again!"

Wow, I feel kinda breathless, but it worked. She looks disgusted and appalled by my words.

But then, she smiles, like she had just won some unspoken battle and she says, grinning and with pure malice splashed across her face.

"He could never love you because you could never be what he needs. You might love him, because let's be honest, the man is a dream, but he could never love anyone, let alone someone like you. He's broken, and as soon as you realize that, the sooner we can all go back to our lives. He's not the man for you Anastasia, and you are definitely not the right woman for him. And you will never be. And now if you excuse me, i have to go. I hope you listen to me and end this ridiculous situation for Anastasia."

And with that, she walks out of my house exactly as she walked in, dominating.

"God, I hate this woman so much!"

I yell my lungs out. Who the hell does she think she is to come into my home and talk to me like that! She has no idea the kind of relationship we have, had...or does she?

Either way, she has no right to tell me those things, playing the all mighty know it all when it's her fault he grew up to become this fucked up fifty shades that broke my heart in the first place!

He's my fifty shades, not hers! He showed me he could change, that he would change for me, not her!

But then again, I can't be what he really needs, that had become quite clear a few days ago. So maybe the stupid bitch is right, maybe I will never be the right one for him.

And if that's the case, I am done thinking about her, Christian or anything else concerning any of them. It's time to get back to the real world.

And as soon as I look at my watch I realize I'm late.

"Great! Now I'm pissed and late for work! Awesome day!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:**I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)

***** Christian *****

"Grey!" I yell at my phone, anger getting the best of me, like always! Working it's definitely the last thing i want to do right now, since Anastasia left i can't seem to function properly, and the nightmares are back again, this time worse! Great, no Ana and now i have to deal with fucking incompetents on the phone, with barely no sleep in me and with a mood to just beat the shit out of everyone around me.

"No! Let that bastard know that the deal is off unless he agrees to my terms! I don't care about any crap this time Ros, make it happen!" Damn, i'm so tired and i'm barely through all this fucking paperwork i have on my desk. And then suddenly i hear her annoying voice, just what i needed today.

"Hello dear! How are you doing today?" She says, looking all radiant and happy. Could she be any more irritating than this!

"What are you doing here Elena? I'm busy!" I blurt out, causing her to stiffen a little and take a step back. Good, she got the message.

"Christian, relax! Let's go for some lunch, i think you're going to like what i have to tell you!" she continues to grin at me, and my entire being just wants to swap that grin of her face and throw her out of my office, but before i get to do anything she continues to talk about her 'surprise'. Like i gave a damn about any surprises coming from her.

"I know this all Anastasia business left you a little on edge, but i think i found the perfect girl for you! She is a gorgeous brunette girl, just how you like them! Come on, you know you're curious, i can see it in your eyes!" she says, so happy and satisfied with herself. Who the fuck does she think she is to even think she can know what i want or like right now. That's it, visit is over and i'm getting her out of here now!

"Shut the hell up Elena! You have no idea what i want or how i want it! You never did! Anastasia isn't someone to just replace with the next brunette with blue eyes you see! She made me see the world in a very different perspective and i don't expect you to understand that! Now get out and don't come back because i'm done with this conversation and quite frankly you are the last person i want to see right now!Now get the fuck out and stay out!" i yell, angry as hell, furious that she could ever consider Ana to be just some other girl i could replace.

She could never understand what Ana made me feel and now that she was gone, i was starting to get really scared that she was never going to let me in her life again. I couldn't let that happen, i wouldn't! Anastasia was my future and i was going to fight for her, no matter how long it took!

"Andrea, cancel all my meetings today, I'm going out, and i'm not coming back until tomorrow! Anything urgent send me an email" I blurt at the intercom, not caring at all at how rude i sounded. I was done with work, right now i was going to make sure Anastasia was my only priority.

"Taylor, i'm leaving now. Meet me outside." i blurt in my phone. Sometimes i wonder just how thick of a skin Taylor had to put up with me. It was his job but still, the man is a fucking rock. Maybe that's why he's so good at his job.

"Sir, where to?" Taylor asks, after opening my door looking puzzled, probably because he was expecting me to stay at the office until late, again. But i shrug it off and just tell him "Take me to SIP. I'm going to see Miss Steele now."

A few minutes later we are outside of SIP, and suddenly, my stomach gets super tight and i get a little out of air. What the hell? I never got this nervous for anything before, let alone a woman! But then again, my relationship with Anastasia was all about firsts. Taking a deep breath i get out of the car and walk in the building, hoping that Ana was in there and would actually appreciate his gesture.

"I want to see Anastasia Steele. Where is she?" I ask the receptionist, who now looks dumbfounded by my appearance. It's just a pretty face darling, i think to myself.

"S-She is right down the hall. I can take you there if you wish." she says, looking all helpful and flustered.

"That's ok, i think i can manage." I say, grinning to the girl who now just seems to have acquired a new shade of pinkish red in her cheeks. Lovely, you still got it Grey!

After a few seconds of walking in, i finally see her, and my god, does she look beautiful. Her long brown hair dropping softly down her back, her skin looking flawless as always, her lips plumped and juicy as hell. And her eyes, those wonderful blue eyes i love so much. If it wasn't for the purple circles under her eyes she would be the perfect sight for my very hungry eyes!

"Hello Anastasia." i manage to say, without sounding nervous or anxious. Christian Grey, always in control of his emotions strikes again.

And then i see it, a roller coaster of emotions flash between her gorgeous face: surprise, confusion, sorrow and finally pain. Damn it, not what i want to see but then again, what could i have expected after our rushed departure?

"Mr Grey, what are you doing here?" she murmurs almost inaudible, if i haven't got closer to her i would have missed it. I can see that she has no idea what to do with herself, and a tiny part of me feels proud. I can still mess with her emotions, and that means hope for us.

"I was hoping we could talk. If you weren't to busy of course." I say to her, never leaving her gaze, hoping to show her that she is the only person i care, in the entire world. But of course she is too nervous to even look at me and she tries to shoo me away.

"Mr Grey, i am incredibly busy right now. If you don't mind, i need to get back to work." she says, surprisingly looking straight in my eyes and showing suck certainty in her words that find myself not knowing what to say next.

"I'm sorry, of course i understand. But maybe after work we could go for dinner somewhere you like and talk. Please Ana, it's really important to me." I almost beg her, not feeling at all ashamed, given the fact that what i really want is just to be alone with her so i can get a better sense of what she is feeling towards me right now.

"I'm sorry, but i already have plans for tonight." she says, looking utterly proud of herself, and for a moment, so do i. She manages to not only make me extremely jealous but also feel replaceable, which is a feeling i'm not normally used to feel like that.

"I see. Well, i'm not giving up so you better just tell me when you're available. Like i said, it's important." i say, flashing a small grin, and then there it is, a soft pink blush appears on her face and i know i won. God does she look beautiful all flustered. And like that wasn't triumph enough, she starts to bite on her lower lip. Damn, just like that, i feel extremely horny and all i want to do right now is grab her, pin her against the wall and take her right there, making her scream and moan as loud as she wants. Get a grip Grey! Not here, not now!

"Fine. I'm free tomorrow night." she finally says, unaware of my inner monologue and consequent small erection.

"Shall i pick you up here or at home?" i say, with a bit of a triumphant grin on my face.

"You can pick me up here at 6.30pm." she says, looking annoyed and irritated by my now full grin.

"Then i'll see you tomorrow Anastasia. I'll think of you until then." i say, taking her hand and kissing her knuckles, only to see her taking a deep breath and stiffen herself, like she was holding herself back from doing anything she might regret. And before i could say or do anything else, she redraws her hand from my lips and simply goes back to work, not giving me another glance as she dives into work again.

Damn, when did she get this self-control? I can barely hold myself together just by watching her biting her lip, let alone kissing her hand, that soft and perfect hand. What i could do to her right now. No! Pull yourself together! If Anastasia can do it, so can you. And with a soft "Goodbye Anastasia" i turn my back on her and walk out of the building, already thinking of the million things i will do to her when she comes back to me eventually.

"Take me back to the office Taylor, turns out i still have a bit of time until i can see Miss Steele again." i say to Taylor, sounding bitter and almost pouting to myself. Fuck, she looks beautiful, strong and more confident in herself than ever! And then i feel a sudden movement in my groin and i know, Anastasia Steele will be mine again! No matter how long it takes or how hard it gets, i will have her in my bed again and i will make her come over and over, showing her that she is mine and only mine, body and soul! And then i remember: where the hell is she going tonight and with who? Whoever the fucker is, he better not touch her or it will be the last thing he does!


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: ****I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Ana *****

Shit! Why was he here? What does he want? And why does he look so damn sexy? It's unbelievable, just the smallest touch from him sends a jolt of pure electricity down my entire body and i just can't understand how he does it. He kisses my hand and then, bum, i feel as aroused as if he had just pushed his fingers inside of me. Oh my god, i miss him so much. His touch is all my body craves for, his skilled fingers and that tongue of his, the miracles it can perform in such a small window of time, and the smell of him is downright intoxicating.

I can't even believe i had the strength to deny his first attempt to meet me, and i have to say, watching that small glimpse of jealousy in his eyes, after i told him i had plans for tonight, made me feel quite proud of myself, although i just knew i had to cave sometime, so i guess tomorrow is the night. Ah hell, i'm already thinking about him pushing me against the elevator wall and just taking me right there, long and hard, taking no prisoner, pushing harder and harder, using the full force of his perfectly chiselled body, grabbing my ass firmly and squeezing it, kissing me like there's no tomorrow and just tormenting my breasts with his knowing hands, and then taking his tongue and using it to lick and harden my nipples and then when i'm almost over the edge...I'm forced back to reality by my boss Jack Hyde almost yelling at me "Ana, i need you to make a copy of these manuscripts so i can send them to our client!". I guess he had already said that, i just happened to be very busy having extremely hot sex in my mind to notice him.

"Sorry Jack. I'm on it." i quickly reply, trying to sound all business like, relieved that i'm not a man right now, because if that was the case, i would be having a very hard erection at this very moment. Instead i'm just really flustered and heavy breathing. Way to go Ana, having sex in the workplace is another first for you. Thank god it was only an imaginary laid, no major harm done there, other than your wet panties.

As soon as i'm back from my task and looking through my mails there it is, an email from him, like a siren. Oh man, really? Right now? Ahhhh! Well, better read it now and get it over with!

**From: **Christian Grey

**Subject: **Tomorrow night

**Date: ** 6 June, 2011 15:12

**To: **Anastasia Steele

Dear Anastasia, you look beautiful as always.

I'm looking forward to see you tomorrow, it has been long overdue!

Have a good day and be safe tonight. Please.

P.S.: I'm just curious, where are you going tonight and with who?

Christian Grey

CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc.

Great, just what i needed. It's like he knows exactly how to push my buttons, the right ones. Oh well, he does, he really does! But then again, he obviously is jealous and quite curious about tonight. And he shall keep being curious, for all i care. As i send the reply i cannot help myself from feeling extremely nervous of his response.

**From: **Anastasia Steele

**Subject: **Tomorrow night

**Date: **6 June, 2011, 15:15

**To: **Christian Grey

Mr Grey, thank you for your kind words and yes, i will be safe tonight, no need for you to worry.

As to 'where' and 'who' i will be with tonight, that is something for me to know and for you to not ask or find out.

I do have a life that no longer concerns you. Please respect that.

Good day to you too. See you tomorrow.

Anastasia Steele

Assistant to Jack Hyde, Commissioning Editor, SIP

Deep breaths Ana, just take deep breaths. After what felt like five hours but was in fact 4 minutes, i hear a ping. He answered, good! I hope.

**From: **Christian Grey

**Subject: **Who are you and what have you done with Anastasia Steele?

**Date: ** 6 June, 2011 15:12

**To: **Anastasia Steele

First of all, please understand that i will always worry about you, no matter how many times you tell me not to.

I respect your privacy and for that matter alone will not ask anything further. Although i am quite tempted to find out on my own, given my stalker tendencies (as you called it).

My only wish is for you to be safe and nothing else, so if you want, i could send someone to drive you to your 'date' and bring you back home safe and sound.

Again, i wish you the very best day and hope that tomorrow we can finally have some time alone.

P.S.: Please don't do anything reckless.

Christian Grey

Jealous, stalker and worried CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc.

Wow! Really? I don't even know what to say to that. He is some piece of work alright. Ok, it's very sweet of him to worry about my safety and blah blah blah, but i know what he wants to do and i'm not giving him that satisfaction! So i decide to send him something that will shut him up and hopefully make him question his own thoughts.

**From: **Anastasia Steele

**Subject: **Still the same over here.

**Date: **6 June, 2011, 15:15

**To: **Christian Grey

I understand your concern and for that will not ask you to stop with it.

I appreciate you giving me my privacy, even if it's not yours to give.

I will be safe, well protected from all the dangers out there and will be very well accompanied so please, don't worry.

I do not require a ride, i already have someone i trust to do that for me, but thank you for the offer.

Now i need to get back to work. Good day Mr Grey.

Anastasia Steele

Assistant to Jack Hyde, Commissioning Editor, SIP

And with that, i close my laptop and go back to my work, sorting mail for Jack and so on. Better to keep myself busy, so i don't wonder of again.

When i look at my watch it's already 7.25pm. Damn, i'm late already! And i still need to get home and get ready for my 'date' tonight. I make sure to leave everything nice and tidy in my desk and i walk to Jack's office to ask if it's ok to leave now. He waves me goodbye, his eyes wandering to my breasts but i make no fuss of it, seeing i just want to get back home and get doled up.

As soon as i get home, i quickly go to the bedroom to figure out what to wear tonight and i settle for a very fitted backless dress, one of Kate's dresses of course, in a shade of dark burgundy. I pair it with some black pumps, also Kate's, and i style my hair so it falls in soft waves behind my back.

I look myself in the mirror, and apart from the little purple circles i have under my eyes i actually look good, so i just decide to put some colour in my cheeks, do a really soft smoky eye and apply some nude lipstick with some gloss to really make my lips pop. A last look to check myself up and i can say, with some confidence, that i look sexy. I guess being with Christian, as weird and screwed up as it was, gave me the confidence to actually like myself more and appreciate me for me.

Now that i'm done i check my phone to see a message already sitting there from my dear friend José, "I'm here. Let's go chica!" And that's my signal, i grab my black clutch, Kate's gift to me and close the door behind me. As soon as i get in the car a very surprised José gives me the dumbest smile ever and says "Wow! You look really good Ana! Damn!". And just like that i know it's going to be a very good night, just some fun with friends, great vibe and no stressing about grey eyes or twitching palms. Just what i need, and hopefully i won't drunk dial tonight!


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: ****I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

**For those of you who think this will just be a story about Ana and Christian overcoming their differences and getting back together after the first 3 episodes, i say: "You couldn't be more wrong". I have a completely different story in mind and if you bear with me i will prove it! And to start showing it off, here is chapter 4, enjoy ;)**

_"Love is great, love is fine, Out the box, outta line,_

_ The affliction of the feeling, leaves me wanting more._

_ Cause i maybe bad, but i'm perfectly good at it._

_ Sex in the air, i don't care, I love the smell of it._

_ Sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and wipes excite me"_

Oh shit! This song is so fifty i don't even need to explain why...oh well, you kind of like it rough Ana so just dance. And for a second i have to agree with my inner goddess, i do like it rough, except for the wiping part!

"Hey Ana! I haven't seen you dance like this since your freshman year! Welcome back girl!" says Parker, one of my friends from college. Tall, green eyes, tanned and very handsome i might add. That's why he was one of my smaller crushes from that time of my life. He was one of the seniors hazing us and he was always super nice, not just to girls, so i immediately liked him. But he was older and he had a girlfriend so i didn't follow through with that. But now here he was, single, looking better than ever and he remembered me. Way to go Ana!

"Thanks! I feel great tonight! This is just what i needed!" I say, a little too loud, given the blasting level of the music around us. We were in a little bar called "The spot", it was nice, not very crowded and we could claim the dance floor to ourselves because everyone there was just a little over 30 and just wanting to drink something and go home.

"Hey i'm gonna get us some drinks! What do you want Ana?" says José, giving me the look that says, yes you're going to drink something so just tell me what you want or i'll just bring something strong and push down your throat! "I'll have a beer José, thanks!" i say, hoping to hide my already inebriated state. Damn, i should have eaten something at home! I'm such a light weight! Oh oh, i know someone who wouldn't appreciate me doing this but seems like he got my message and is giving me my privacy. How very not fifty of him, i'm impressed. No! No thinking about him tonight, focus on dancing, drinking and mingling! Yes, i'll do that!

"Here you go! And just so you know, i can see that you're already a little drunk so that's your last drink ok Ana?" says José, looking all worried and responsible. But hey, he's right, i am already drunk and the last thing i need is to throw up again in front of everyone or spend tomorrow with a hangover the size of Texas.

"Thanks José. Yeah you're right, i'm a little tipsy, but i'm ok! Let's just go dance!" I say, too loud again and turning to the dance floor, feeling very proud of myself for not tripping and falling on my ass when i suddenly bump into someone and lose my grip, and then it happens, all too quick for my very intoxicated state. Someone grabs my arm, circles my waist and holds me tight against their chest. Oh my! I look up and there he is, my saviour, looking all knight in shiny armour.

"You ok Ana? You almost dropped there hun?" he says, looking utterly amused with himself or me, can't really tell which one. But i really couldn't care less, because right now, being this close to him actually makes me feel pretty good and i have to say, there's nothing like being swept of your feet by a hot guy with great eyes!

"S-Sorry Parker! I guess this should really be my last beer!" i say, looking a little ashamed but also flustered. Damn, and he smelled really good too! Such a dangerous combination for someone in such a fragile state such as myself to behold. And then, out of the blue, he just blurts out something that makes me blush even more, if that's even possible.

"Ana, you really are a beautiful woman. And i just wanted you to know that if you ever feel like going out, just the two of us, i would feel very honoured to accompany you." he says, looking a little shy and perhaps blushing a little, but of course i can't say for sure because i stop looking at him and try to concentrate on the tile pattern of the dance floor. Damn, i did not see that one coming. Come on Ana, say something! He's hot! And he likes you! Come on!

"Uh, thank you, you were always a very nice guy you know that? You were my favourite senior so you know! But i thought you had a girlfriend or something..." i say, trying to shift the heat of the conversation back to him. But no, doesn't work. "Nop. Single over here, almost a year actually. So i guess we can go on a date hun?" he says, smiling and looking me straight in the eyes. Oh my, such a beautiful smile, and those eyes...Shit! Am i that drunk or is he that attractive? You better handle this very carefully Ana, 'cause you're wasted and he's hot, so don't do anything you'll regret!

"Hun, sure, why not? If you insist i can make the effort!" i say, smiling so he can see i'm joking, trying tp switch to a more relaxed level of conversation and then i notice i'm biting my lower lip. Oh no! I'm aroused by this Adonis of a man and i'm way to drunk to think straight!

But before i can do anything to prevent a bad decision from appearing he completely takes me by surprise and kisses me, oh so very softly on the lips, lingering there just enough so i can feel my cheeks turning a whole new shade of red! Wow, he really he's a great guy and hot as hell, and all i can say is, apart from my inebriated state, that was an amazing kiss and for a second i wonder what would fifty think if he saw me right now!

And that just makes me feel even more proud and happy with myself. You managed to go out, have fun, dance your ass off and still get kissed by the hottest guy around! Way to go Ana, who knew you hadn't in you! And for once, i agree with my inner goddess, this was an amazing night and i was ready to go back home and wake up feeling like a whole new Anastasia Steele!

***** Christian *****

"Fuck!" i yell at myself, because right now i'm home, practically alone, after sending Taylor and Mrs Jones out for the rest of the night.

I had no idea that letting Anastasia go out by herself, with god knows who, doing god knows what, would put me in such a foul mood! I was trying to respect her wishes but not knowing where she was or if she was ok was making me feel pretty uncomfortable and i was getting a bad feeling, like something was wrong. So i decided to do what i could do right now, ask her directly if she was ok. I ring her phone, once, twice, and after 5 attempts nothing. Damn it! Was she deliberately dismissing my calls or was something truly wrong? I was starting to get really pissed and worried so i try one last thing to calm my nerves. I send her a text.

*Anastasia, i tried to call you. Are you ok? Please, say something*

After i hit send, i stare at my phone for what felt like 2 hours, but after 4 minutes she replies. Oh thank god, she's alive al least.

*Ana is fine. She is having fun. Leave her be.*

What the fuck?! Who the hell is answering for her and why? Is she alone with some fucker? Is she really ok? Shit, i should have sent Taylor to look after her, now i have no idea where she is or if she's really ok and this feeling of utterly helplessness doesn't sit right with me at all! Next time you're getting a full entourage of spies to look after you little lady, and later on, you'll be getting some good old fashioned spanking for making me worry like a freaking moron! God, i hope you're ok Ana, so help me god, or i will kill someone if anything happens to you!

***** Ana *****

"Hey, why are you holding my phone? Did someone call?" i ask, looking a little worried that someone would call me this late.

"Sorry Ana, i answered because it kept calling. But it was a wrong number, nothing to worry! Ready to go home? Gotta work tomorrow chica!" He says, with a look on his face that i can't quite put my finger on, but i let it go. After all, i'm in such a good mood i doubt anything could spoil this moment right now.

"Sure! I guess it's time to get back to reality! Not that i'm in a hurry though!." i say, pouting a little, causing an immediate laughter from everyone around me and receiving a very sweet peck on the cheeks by my very own green eyed knight.

Going out was definitely the best decision you have made since Friday Ana! And me and my inner goddess agree, it was a night to remember!


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

_Ring Ring Ring_...

_Ring Ring Ring..._

"Humm, what is that damn noise? Shut up already!" i say, slowly opening my eyes, only to feel the full strength of my newly acquired hangover. Damn, i hadn't felt like this since i was in college. You're getting old Ana!

_Ring Ring Ring..._

"Oh, is the door bell? What time is it?" i murmur, looking at my alarm clock. Oh shit, it's 7.30am already. I'm going to be late and with this headache i need at least one hour to pull myself together, or at the very least, get myself cleaned up to get rid of the stench of alcohol in me. Ugh, my breath is atrocious too!

_Ring Ring Ring..._

"Ah hell! Ok ok! I'm coming! Stop ringing that damn thing!" i yell, already pissed at whomever it is on the other end of that door!

Getting up, very slowly and very reluctantly, i grab my robe, slap my cheeks a couple of times to wake myself up and walk towards the still ringing door. Damn, such hurry, so early in the day! When i open the door, all my anger suddenly disappears and i'm left with an open mouth and grey eyes glaring at me.

"Good morning Anastasia" he says, in a very cold and slightly pissed of tone, looking beautiful and fifty as always. Oh my god!

"Christian" i whisper, not being able to say another word and looking like a deer caught in the headlights, literally.

"I see you just woke up. That must mean last night was fun hun?" he asks, controlled anger and bitterness splashed across his face. Oh shit, he's pissed and he's in my apartment. I'm in my robe, and i have a massive headache and now i seem to have lost the ability to speak. Great! Come on Ana, wake up! Talk damn it!

"Y-yes. You woke me up with all the ringing." i say, sounding a bit too ashamed for my taste, but i couldn't help it, i felt ashamed at myself for letting tonight get so wild.

"So, can i come in or what?" he says, annoyed and impatient.

"I have to get ready for work and i'm already late as you can see. Is it urgent?" I say, looking also annoyed and impatient so he gets a taste of his own medicine. Because honestly, i am in no mood to talk to a very pissed Christian Grey , this early in the morning and in such a fragile condition as i find myself in.

"It won't take long." he says, and with that, he barges in, and positions himself in front of me, closes the door and grabs my arms, keeping his very penetrating gaze on me. Oh my god, his smell is just too good to be true, and his touch, even such a forced one, is just heaven for my senses. How i have missed him, all of him! I want him so much! Fuck! Not now Ana! He's not welcome here now, so let him know that!

"Let go of me! What the hell is your problem anyway?!" i blurt at him, causing him to raise his eyebrows as a response and letting go of my arms, but still glaring at me. Good, mission accomplished, i think.

"Where were you yesterday Anastasia? And who were you with? Please answer me Ana! I deserve to know after spending the entire night worrying about you!"

"So this is the urgent matter that couldn't wait?" i say, sounding annoyed and not at all pleased by this interrogation. After his almost unnoticeable nod, i proceed with my line of thought. "Why do you care where i was or who i was with? It's my life and i don't need to explain myself to you Mr Grey." i say, pronouncing each syllable to ensure maximum absorption on his part.

"Where were you Ana? Were you with someone else? Just tell me please." he says, almost pleading to my soul with those sparkling grey eyes never leaving mine. Damn, he makes me feel so special when he looks at me like that, so unique and one of a kind. And just like that i melt and my brick walls turn into butter.

"Fine, if you really need to know, i went out with José and some friends from college. We went to a bar, had a few drinks, danced and had a good time." i say, blushing a bit and avoiding his gaze, giving away almost immediately that something else had went down last night that i wasn't really feeling like sharing. Of course he picks up on it and, like a shark smelling blood in the ocean, he goes for the kill.

"What happened Anastasia? What did you do last night that makes you so ashamed to tell me?" he says, sounding all understanding and sympathetic. Of course i know, the minute that truth is out, he will go all mercurial on me and just get full blown pissed. But i won't lie to him, i promised him that a long time ago.

"I don't think you're going to like it but i'm going to tell you anyway. Last night, someone kissed me. It was very sudden and very short lived. I had no reaction at all." i say, truly sorry and full of regret. Apart from being a very nice kiss, right now i just want to be kissed by one man, and he is starting to look a bit too dangerous for that effect. Oh boy, here it comes.

"Who was it?" he hisses, heavy breathing and glaring at me at full rage. Never seizes to amaze me how he can go from a puppy dog eyed look to a full hell on earth one in just two seconds.

"His name is Parker, he was one of the seniors of our class." i say, avoiding his gaze at any cost and holding back several tears filled with regret and anguish. I hate it that he can make me feel so guilty for something i had nothing to do with.

"Did you kiss him back? Did you like it? He touched you anywhere else? Just tell me Anastasia!" he almost yells, now just sounding utterly desperate and holding on for my answer like his life depended on it. Oh poor fifty, i hate to see you like this! I am so sorry!

"No! I told you, i didn't see it coming and it was short. No touching anywhere, it was just a kiss." i say, not looking at him at all, feeling my tears getting oh so very close to fall. Why am i so strong in my head but then in front of him i just melt instantly?

"Did you like it? Did you feel anything?" he whispers to me, holding me against him and tilting my head back forcing me to look him straight in the eyes. Those drop dead gorgeous eyes of his, searching for my answer before i open my mouth. He truly is the most alluring man i have ever known and i miss every bit of him right now.

"No! I was drunk and i felt nothing. Because no matter how many guys try to kiss me, they have nothing against you! There, are you happy? You can go back to your Ivory tower knowing you're the man now!" i say, tears sprinkling down my cheeks. How can he do this to me? Making me feel so miserable just because someone else felt me attractive enough to kiss me, even if so very gently. He knows how i feel about him and yet here he is, demanding explanations from me like i'm one of his subs. I hate feeling like this because all i want is to be with him and i can't!

But before i can say anything else or do something to stop my tears from falling he pulls me against his chest, one hand cradling my head and the other circling my waist and kisses me with such ferocity and longing i just feel my legs melt and failing on me. He then drags both hands to my behind, lifts me up, and now i'm straddling him and he keeps tormenting with his tongue, going from my mouth to my neck, kissing, biting and licking, and then shifting his full attention to my already hardened nipples, licking them, pulling them and making me moan for dear life. How i have missed his touch, his smell, his taste.

Everything about him is intoxicating and i just can't fight anymore, i want him and i want him now and if his mouth wasn't enough of a sign that he wants me just as much, his full erection makes it perfectly clear. He is going to fuck me, hard and i am going to love every single minute of it.

"Oh Ana! I have missed you so much! I want to fuck you so hard right now!" he whispers in my ears, full of lust and longing. And as he says it he removes my robe, pushes down my pajama shorts and rips my panties apart and throws me onto the bed. Damn, i liked those! He then proceeds to, in light speed, removing his pants and boxers, and putting the condom on. When he got it out of the packaging i don't even know, because right now all i can think about its him, on top of me, trusting into me, slow and hard, making me gasp at the amazing feeling of him inside me again.

And then he continues exploring my body, licking, biting, sucking, kissing and causing me to moan and scream at his every move, and then i feel it, my entire body trembling with anticipation for that sweet and long overdue jump into oblivious that i have missed so much. With one last trust, harder and tighter that ever i make my jump and then he follows me, gasping for air and holding me in place, kissing my lips and looking at me saying "You're mine Ana! Mine!".

"Yes, i'm yours Christian. Always." i whisper to him, letting him cradle me and stroke my hair and my back. We stay like that, laid in my bed, holding each other for a while, until i start hearing something buzzing. What is that? It keeps buzzing for a few minutes and its starting to get annoying as hell. I try to look around and find the cause of that annoying noise so i can go back to my very distracting fifty, but that's when i feel myself getting dizzier and dizzier, the sound of Christian's voice getting muffled by the second, no longer feeling his hold on me and then everything gets foggy and i feel myself falling into darkness, leaving behind my Adonis looking fifty, before hitting the ground with a massive thud.

"Ouch! What the hell?" i cry out, abruptly waking up, with a huge pounding in my head, and for the first time in my life, i wish i could go back to sleep because when i can finally get a grip on myself and open my eyes, i realize that the most amazing night of my life in the last few days, was just a very hot, dirty and intoxicating dream. My fifty is nowhere to be seen, i am fully dressed and late for work. Again! Reality is a cruel bitch, one that is truly deserving of some serious spanking!


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

"Take everything off. On your knees. Don't look at me. " she commands, softly and clearly aware of her power over the very young and handsome man in front of her. Elena was in her natural habitat being a mistress, domination was her true calling and she loved every minute of it. Even though she would always miss that 15 grey eyed troubled boy she once knew and still loved, she would always find new projects to occupy herself with and right now, she was having a lot of fun with her new acquisition. She had found him in an underground club somewhere in Seattle, and after casually engaging him, she soon realized he was more than willing to be with her, no matter what her conditions were. I guess being a well-preserved cougar had its advantages, and she wouldn't lose opportunities like this.

He was a little older than what she used to go for but even though he wasn't exactly innocent or pure, something about his green eyes and his tan complexion made her feel aroused and all she wanted to do was bit him up into full submission. Pain and pleasure, always one before the other, that's how she did it and he seemed to be loving every second of torture from her knowing hands.

"Good. Now i am going to whip you four times. Do you know why?" she says, in a calm and collected voice, but with a fire in her eyes that showed she meant business.

"Yes mistress. I kissed another woman." he says apologetically, bowing his head and never looking in her eyes. Excellent, he really was improving and fast.

"That's right. And you know i don't like to share what is mine. So you will count every blow and will not make a sound. Understand?" she asks him, licking her lips in anticipation, her hand already gripping the black leather whip, and gently stroking it. This truly was one of her ultimate favourite toys to play with.

"Yes mistress." he answers, heavy breathing and also licking his lips. I guess anticipation worked both ways in this situation. Good, that would only increase the pleasure she got out of this.

"Good boy. Now, lay on the bed with your ass up, i will whip you there. And remember to count or i will punish you further." she says, admiring his perfect body as he nods and does what she ordered never looking up. I guess it's true what they say, some man just like to be wiped into shape.

After he settles on the bed, exactly as she commanded, she starts to stroke his behind with her warm hand and then, suddenly and incredibly fast she whips him one time. "One" he gasps, clearly surprised by her strength and speed. Stroking his ass again, she removes her hand only to whip him again, even harder and faster, if that was even possible. "Two" he says, this time letting his pleasure show, gasping and breathing heavily. And then, the final stroke comes and the last whip appears, loud and fast, leaving him with a very red bottom. Three" he almost yells, but controlling himself immediately after. He sure knew how to please his mistress and he was doing one hell of a job as her new sub. She was pleased.

"Good boy. Now be still, i will take care of that red ass in a minute" she says, clearly pleased and satisfied with his performance. After grabbing the calming lotion from one of her drawers, she begins to very gently rub his behind, admiring it at the same time that she starts to kiss and lick his back. She was extremely turned on after their little scene and noticing his heavy breathing and very soft moaning she could tell he wanted her too. Since he was such a good boy, she was going to give him a nice treat, just to prove that she was truly the best mistress he could have.

"Turn around and start to undress me. But do it slowly." she commands. He does as she says and starts to take off her silky robe, never looking her in the eyes, and then proceeds to unbuckle her bra and remove her panties, leaving her completely naked and awaiting further instructions. Oh my, such control in such a young age, what a prodigy she had uncovered. And just because of that she would give him an even bigger reward. "Lay on the bed, face up. I am going to please you now" she commands. He follows her command immediately.

She then positions herself on top of him and without a warning starts to lick and stroke his manhood, causing him to gasp in surprise and provoking a very uncontrolled reaction from him, he moans, loudly, causing her to stop and say "Be quiet. Or i will stop,", and he does it instantly. Obviously pleased with his response she begins to suck and pull his manhood, alternating between soft and slow to fast and hard, and then when he's almost on the edge of surrendering to full-blown pleasure, she stops, puts on the condom that was already close to the bed and starts to fuck him, slowly and steady, every movement made by her and altered by her.

"Don't move. I want to fuck you and make you come now" she says, extremely aroused and ready to make his whole world collapse inside of her. It wasn't long before she felt that sweet jump to oblivion and as result his full surrender to her and her body. Gasping for air she says to him "There. That's what a good submissive gets after pleasing his mistress. Now go get cleaned up, dressed and get back. I have to talk to you." she says, already full mistress mode, leaving him to almost run to the bathroom to do her bid.

After dressing herself and putting away her favourite whip, she begins to think of her next move to remove Anastasia Steele from Christian's life and consequently, from her life permanently. After all, Christian Grey was hers first and she was not going to let him get stolen away by some scrawny clumsy pale excuse of a woman like Anastasia. Not if she had anything to say about it.

"I'm done mistress." he says, entering the room, looking gorgeous and slightly flushed, clearly a side effect of their previous activity. "Good. Sit down next to me and answer me truthfully. Last night, when you kissed Anastasia, did she seem to like it or not?" she asks, truly curious and hopeful for a positive answer. And then he confirms her wishes, looking proud of himself "Yes mistress. She was surprised but she didn't push me away or anything like that. She blushed a little and we continued dancing after it. She liked it i am sure."

And there it was, the answer to my Anastasia problem, in a form of a tan, green-eyed Adonis looking man. My new sub, her very one college buddy Parker Lewis was going to make sure that she would never be with Christian again and for once, Elena felt truly victorious. She had found a way to mine their relationship without getting caught or without being taken as a suspect. It truly was a master plan and she was going to make sure that it followed trough. Christian would be hers again, and Parker would be the key to accomplish that.

***** Christian *****

It was 6.30am and sleep was evading me fast. I mean, i was incredibly tired, but this all Anastasia ordeal made me anxious and all i wanted to do was go to her apartment and see her, just to make sure she was ok. Of course, i had already sent one of my man to check on her and i was informed that she had arrived home, unharmed, a little too drunk but other than that she seemed ok.

Now it was only a matter of time until i could get the truth out of her and i'm getting nervous with anticipation. I have no idea if i can wait until later at night to talk to her, but bothering her in her work place didn't seem like the right thing to do. Although i know i'm going to buy that place anytime now, so i will technically be her boss by then.

I haven't told her that yet and i can just guess her reaction of pure horror knowing that, even after running from me and sexual submission, she will just end up working for me, a different type of submission if you think about it. And just thinking about that makes me feel much better. I truly am the control freak she often described me to be, and i am going to give her hell for not taking my feelings in consideration last night. I am pissed at her and whoever sent me that message and i won't rest until i know what the hell happened.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Ana *****

Today was going to be a very long day no doubt about that! I mean, besides having to deal with a massive hangover, I was struggling to get that hot and wet dream of my mind, and my body was nowhere near to recover from the aftershock. Christian had once again walsed swiftly back into my life, and this time, he hadn't even been involved at all, it was all in my very confused and very aroused head.

"Get it together Ana! You have work to do and now is no time to think about naughty dreams." I say to myself, looking down at all the mail I had to sort out for my boss Jack. This was truly a minor job for me, but I was glad to have to do it, it would certainly keep my head busy from wandering about dangerous scenarios.

"Ana, I'm going to need you to stay a little late today. There are a couple of transcripts I steel need to revise and I could use your help while I do that. You ok with that?" Jack asks, bringing me back from my internal rambling.

"S-sure. If you really need me too I'll help you out." I answer, not knowing what to do about my later commitment with the very own Mr. Grey. Well, after showing up at here and asking me on, what I supposed, could be called a date, and after drilling me with questions about me going out last night, he hadn't really said anything else so maybe he had forgotten about it or didn't feel like following through with his plans. I guess I should just get over with it and tell him about my late night at work. Oh well, let the games begin.

**From: **Anastasia Steele

**Subject: **Something came up

**Date: **7 June, 2011 16:45

**To: **Christian Grey

At work, I'm afraid. I will have to stay a little late to help my boss Jack getting some work done.

Although i don't know if dinner tonight was still in your plans or not, I guess we can reschedule it if you still want to talk to me.

Again, I'm sorry but it's work, I can't say no.

Anastasia Steele

Assistant to Jack Hyde, Commissioning Editor, SIP

I hit send and then resume my working, awaiting that ping sound to appease my nerves and tell me that he is alive and still wanting to see me. But that sound doesn't come as fast as I would hope, and before I know it, the building starts to get quieter all of a sudden, everyone going home for the day, leaving me and Jack practically alone. And for once, I feel unease with myself, not liking the feeling of being left completely alone with a man I don't quite know.

"Ana, could you bring me some coffee?" he shouts from his office, sounding tired and annoyed.

"I'm on it." I shout back, glad to have something useful to occupy myself with.

I grab one of the biggest cups, fill it with some fresh brewed coffee, grab two sugar baggies and stroll back into Jack's office only to find him looking rather frazzled.

"Thanks" he mumbles, taking a deep breath and taking the cup from my hands with surprisingly strength. He then drops both bags in the cup and drinks it with such fervor you would think he hadn't drink or eaten in days.

"I'm sorry Ana. But management has been breathing down my neck to get these done as fast as I can. Apparently something is going down and I'm the one that gets screwed over it. Well, and you too of course. Again, thank you for staying tonight, at least we can keep each other company" he says, looking truly thankful and sincere about his motives to keep me here late.

"Any time Jack. I am very glad to be able to help in any way I can. I really like to work here" I say back to him, hoping that he will see how much I intend to help around the business and maybe one day i'll get some appreciation for it, maybe even a promotion. That would be perfect!

"I know, I can tell you really like to work here Ana. And don't worry, you won't be an assistant forever. I have high hopes for you and I will make sure you build a great career right here at SIP" he assures me, making me feel extremely proud of myself. After he gives a slight nod and a small wink I get back to my desk and resume my activity of sorting out any mail, letter and so on, always ready to get up and help him once again. I guess he truly was just asking me to stay to work, and just like that, I relax a little and get a little ashamed of myself. Very stupid of me to just assume everyone is out to get me.

After organizing a few mails directed at Jack and sorting some of the letters addressed to him, I look at my watch, it's now 20:38 and Jack hasn't ask anything else of me so far. So I just sit there and wait. And, like clockwork, I receive an email from no other than Christian Grey himself. I have to say, even though I was thinking about him all this time, having an email there from him, makes my stomach clench and I feel myself sweat a little. The man truly intoxicates me, without even being present.

**From: **Christian Grey

**Subject: **I'm waiting for you Miss Steele

**Date: **6 June, 2011 20:40

**To: **Anastasia Steele

Outside of SIP.

Should I come inside and ask your boss for your earlier release from duty?

I am looking forward for some alone time with you Anastasia and I don't feel like waiting much more.

Christian Grey

Anxious CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings Inc.

Ohh…he's eager to be with me? And alone? Suddenly i feel dizzy. And nauseous. And shaking. And finally, I feel extremely horny. Oh my, he's standing outside, waiting to whisk me away for some alone time and I'm feeling like I should just lay down and sleep it off. Hangover mixed with extreme sexual arousal doesn't feel like the perfect combination. And on top of everything else, I barely ate anything all day. He would certainly be displeased by that, and would definitely want to put me across his knee. And just like that, I get up and walk into Jack's office, determined to find out just how much time it will take for me to see my very own fifty again.

"Hum, Jack. Sorry to bother you but I was just wondering if you still needed me to stay much longer?" I ask him, feeling a little ashamed for my ulterior motive to get out of here.

"Oh, sorry Ana. I got caught up in this and I forgot about you dear. Yes of course, I'm almost done with the last transcript so you can go. And thanks again, you're the best." He says, giving me a warm smile and winking at me. That's all the encouragement I need to grab my things in my desk, leave everything ready for tomorrow and almost run out of the building.

And as soon as I step out of the building there he is, leaning in his Audi R8, looking as handsome and perfect as ever, in one of his perfectly tailored grey suits, top button of his white shirt unbuttoned, his hair looking all wild and untamed and giving him the ultimate bad boy vibe. And what a bad boy he was!

"I'm glad to finally been able to see you Anastasia. And I have to say, it was worth the wait as always" he says, giving me an appreciating look and, I would swear, a bit of lust in the mix. Holding my hand, he softly kisses my knuckles and breathes the scent of me. How can something so simple cause such a response from my entire body? Every bit of me wants to be his, hold him, kiss him, feel him close to me. But I restrain myself from doing just that, aware of the troubled path that would lead us too.

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting Mr. Grey. Shall we go? I'm starving" I say, smiling shyly to him, knowing full well that food was his Achilles' heel. And just like that he ushers me into the car, rounds the front of the car in surprising speed and grace and positions himself in the driver's seat, giving me a small wink that could only mean he was pleased with my sudden interest in eating.

"So Miss Steele, how was work today? Managed to get everything done?" he asks, in a very calm and collected voice, very unlike of him.

"Yes, I think so. And how was work in the glamorous world of Mergers and Acquisitions Mr. Grey?" I ask, in a playful and sarcastic tone, causing him to laugh at loud and giving me the look that said he was truly amused by my good spirits. Oh how I loved to hear him laugh, it was truly sweet music for my ears.

"It has nothing on you Miss Steele. I very much would prefer spending the day with you Anastasia, I hope you know that" he says, suddenly turning the whole conversation much more serious and making me softly blush. Damn! He was so good at this.

"Don't say things like that Christian please. It makes me feel uncomfortable." I plead him, knowing full well that he already realized that by just looking at my recently pinked cheeks.

"I'm sorry Ana. I did not mean to upset you at all. I just wanted you to know how I truly feel about you. I'm just happy you accepted to see me tonight and I'll make sure you don't regret it" He says, looking sincere in his apology but also looking a bit excited I guess? I couldn't tell being him the mercurial man he was.

All I knew was that tonight was not going to be a night like any other. I was going to spend it with my one true love and I was going to have to fight every cell in my, already extremely aroused body, to prevent myself from completely give up to his intoxicating self altogether. And by the looks of it, it was going to be much harder than I thought fighting those gorgeous grey eyes and perfect chiseled body. Oh my, I was really playing with fire and the only question was, how burned was I going to get before it all came crumbling down on me!


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Ana *****

Before I knew it we arrived at our destination. And my god was it beautiful. I had no idea where we were because throughout the entire drive here I had been looking at him or my hands. But this place was incredibly beautiful, it was a secluded place obviously because it was very quiet and surrounded by nature. In front of us was a small wooden cottage, surrounded by white and purple flower. It truly was a dreamy place and here I was, with Mr. Grey himself. He sure was a mysterious and amazing man.

He opened my door and pulled me into his arms, taking in the scent of me again like his life was depending on it. He then took my hand, so very gently and ushered me inside the house, always keeping an eye on me as if to make sure I was enjoying this as much as he was. And I was, it was the best place to be with someone you love, and right now, romance was flowing through the air like crazy. And I had to be as strong as I could possibly be to not let myself get swoop away by this Adonis greek god of a man standing close to me. Hardest task I ever had in my life and I wasn't sure I was going to be successful at it.

"What do you think? Do you like it Anastasia? I didn't really want to share you so I thought this would be a better option." he says, breathing heavily and slowly, never leaving my eyes and reading my every emotion splashed across my face.

"This place is just beautiful Christian. I am truly amazed. Thank you for bringing me here. You didn't have to do this for me." I say, not knowing where to look because I truly felt thankful for him, for his gesture towards me.

"Ana, you deserve the world. And I will do anything in my power to make sure you get it. If you let me." He whispers, getting closer and closer to me, making me take a step back to stop him from completely overpowering me with his scent, allure and intoxicating presence.

"Christian please. You wanted to talk to me and that's why I am here. Nothing changed. We're still not good for each other" I say, sounding much more stronger than my inner convictions. Every fiber of my being wanted to just run into his arms and let him show me just how much he had missed me. But I had to be strong and right now was no time to let my mind wander around.

"I'm sorry Ana. You are right, we should talk. It's just really hard for me to not want to kiss you and make you mine again. You have truly enchanted me and I just can't seem to stay away from you. But I will try my very best to do so. For as long as you wish me too." He says, with a smirk on his gorgeous face, so big I could only slap him in the arm to assure him I was not amused by his sudden change of mood.

"Ok ok. Let's just eat something and start our lovely night on a good note then. This way Miss Steele" he says, holding his hand out to me. I grab it, and after he gently squeezes it, walks us toward the main living room, with me trailing behind him, not being able to avoid my gaze from his perfectly toned ass. My god, this man was perfect in every way and yet again so wrong in so many other ways.

And there in the middle of the room, stood a middle sized, wooden round table, decorated in a very romantic way, two plates set across each other, a vase of red roses in the middle of the table and a bottle of Sancerre wine I assumed, being Christian's favorite, just waiting to be devoured. On the left side of the table stood a little supporting table with three dishes covered by metal lids. And just the smell of it made me lick my lips instantly. Christian noticed and couldn't help but smile and wink at me. He truly was serious when it came to food.

"If you please Miss Steele." He says, pulling up the chair for me to sit in. Wow, a true gentleman, who would have thought?

"Thank you Mr. Grey" I say, clearly amused by his great mood.

"Some wine Miss Steele?" he asks, in a southern accent, making me laugh instantly. He sure was fun when he wasn't being an obsessive control freak. I loved him like this, fun and carefree Christian. So sexy.

"Please Mr. Grey." I say, smiling shyly back at him. This was truly beginning to be a very good night.

After pouring the wine in both of our glasses it was time to unveil the first delicacy. He lifts the lid up and it seems to be a very nice and simple seafood chowder. Yummy, just what I needed, something healthy but still tasty!

"I guess this soup is the perfect beginning of a delicious meal. What do you think Ana?" He asks, smiling ear to ear, clearly pleased with himself, and I have to say, I agree with him, it does smell divine.

"Sounds good to me" I manage to say, trying to avoid licking myself with anticipation. He smirks back at me and starts serving me, with so much precision and determination you would think he was serving the queen of England.

"Thank you" I say, waiting for him to serve himself and then, after a soft smile and a wink from him, we both start devouring that first course. It was so tasty I had to control myself from slurping it all up. He seemed to be in the same mood because he ended that course practically at the same time which made us both laugh a little. I guess he was as hungry as I was.

"That was delicious Christian. Did you make it yourself?" I ask him, clearly mocking the situation, knowing perfectly well he couldn't even boil an egg let alone make something as awesome as this soup. He picks up on my little game and responds in the same mood.

"If I had made it you would be grabbing your stomach for dear life. But thank you for pointing out my culinary flaws Miss Steele. How very charming of you to do so." He says, looking all mockingly appalled by my disdain of his kitchen skills.

"Didn't mean anything by it sir. Just making small talk that's all" I say, in my best southern accent, causing him to just burst out laughing, at me I guess. I didn't really care, it truly was heaven to hear him laugh and I was going to make sure he kept doing it for as long as I could.

"I took no offense my dear. So, should we go on with the next course?" he asks, clearly pleased by my high spirits and lifting the second lid, displaying a perfect looking Parmesan and parsley-crusted salmon, paired with a very tasty looking Crab & asparagus salad with real salad cream. Damn, this was one hell of a meal!

"Wow, that looks even more delicious than the soup!" I say, not being able to restrain myself. I was excited about food, and that didn't happen very often. Christian looked like a kid on Christmas morning, already serving me and himself, smiling that dazzling smile at me, overly pleased with my reaction.

"I'm very glad to see you so happy eating Anastasia. It sure is a sight for sore eyes" he says, still smiling at me. I would never get tired of that smile, no matter how sad or disappointed I was at our current situation.

"This is just too good to refuse. I'm sorry for my poor manners." I say, after noticing that I was almost done eating and he was just starting. But still, he looked rather amused by it and immediately discarded my previous comment. "Don't be silly Ana. I love to see you eat, it's truly mesmerizing. Please, don't mind me" he says, looking very proud of me or him I couldn't really tell. But I soon finish my meal and take a few sips of the wine, which is just to die for of course. I don't intend to get drunk tonight so I'll make sure to keep my drinking to a minimum.

After he finishes, he suddenly looks to me with such determination in his eyes I might pass out from the power of his gaze. And then he says to me, never leaving my eyes and holding my hand softly "Ana, I need to know something and please understand this. I'm not trying to pry in your private life, I just need to know so I can appease my soul. Will you be honest with me?" he asks, and right now all I want do to is kiss him and let him know I have always been truthful with him and always will be. But I restrain myself from dong it and just simply nod. Yes, that's better, no confusion there.

"Ok. Ana, I need to know what happened last night. Why didn't you answered any of my calls and why did someone else respond to message I sent you? I just need to understand and I swear I will let it go." He says, and now this night just got a whole lot more confusing. What? What calls? What message' Was he drunk? Was I drunk? Was I dreaming again? Ouch, my head hurt, I was rambling in my head but he was still staring at me, looking as bit of confused as I was. Ok, let's just clear this out so I can stop my head from spinning.

"Christian, I don't know what you're talking about. Last night I had no calls in my cell and no messages from you either. I'm not sure what to say because you obviously are serious, But I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm sorry" I say, very apologetically, looking utterly ashamed and displeased with the sad look on his face. I hate to cause him any pain and right now I could see he was feeling betrayed.

"Ana, I can prove I sent you a message and someone responded from your phone. Here, check my phone. See for yourself." He says, beginning to sound a little pissed, at me or the situation, I wasn't really sure. Ok, I check his phone and there it is, a message from 'Anastasia', pretty much telling him to fuck off and mind his own business. What the fuck? I did not send this! And I did not get drunk enough to do so without remembering! I remember everything from that night and I know I had my phone with me at all times. I never left my bag . Unless…when I went to the bathroom, but I left it with José, whom I trusted, so I don't understand what happened. José wouldn't mess with my things would he? But wait a minute…then it comes to me, the sight of José holding my phone, looking weird and feeling kind of awkward after I caught him. But he said it was a wrong number calling at that was it, I believed him and didn't think about it for the rest of the night. No he wouldn't. He couldn't. Not my dear friend José. Oh no. What do I do now? How the hell am I suppose to explain myself without knowing all the facts?

"Ana, just tell me what happened. I just want to know the truth, no matter how bad it might be. Please" he begs me, looking straight in my eyes, still holding my hand and squeezing it. How boy, now I was truly confused.

"Christian I told you, I don't know what's going on here. Please, you need to believe me. I'm not lying to you, why would i?!" I blurt out, not able to hide my frustration and anger at this whole thing. And then it hits me, the only person who can clear this whole mess up it's José. I need to call him and fast.

"Christian, I need to make a phone call and hopefully it will make this whole situation much clearer. Ok?" I ask him, squeezing his hand so to show him that I'm not mad or upset at him.

"Ok Ana, but just make it fast. I need to know what happened" he says, looking rather sad and heartbroken, but I make my way across the room and into one of the smaller rooms and shut the door behind me. Ok, its crunching time, so I decide to call José immediately.

_Ring Ring Ring…Hi Ana! What's up girl?_

_Hum, José, I need to ask you something and please, don't lie to me._

_O-Ok Ana. Sure, anything for you._

_Ok. José, last night, did you mess with my phone and text something to Christian from my phone?_

_Hmm, Ana. Look, that guy is wrong for you. You are so much better than him, he doesn't deserve you. I was just trying to help you move forward that's all. I'm sorry I lied and I'm sorry if you get mad at me for it but I swear I did it for you. You were so happy and carefree I just wanted to keep you like that for as long as I could. I care about you Ana, you know that. I just want you to be happy. I'm sorry I lied though, I should have told you. I'm sorry_

_Oh my god. José how could you? I trusted you, I have trusted you for so long and I just don't understand how you could do this to me! You had no right to mess with my life like that! You had no right!_

_Ana I'm sorry" I'm so sorry! Please believe me! Don't be mad at me please!_

_No! I can't talk to you right now! I'm really disappointed José. You were one of my best friends and now I just don't know what to believe anymore. I'm sorry. I gotta go._

_Ana please! Ana!_

And I just close my phone and stare at it. What the fuck is wrong with him? How could he do this? And he still thinks it was for my own good? I mean, who the heel does he think he is to play games with my life? I'm so pissed right now I could scream. And then I notice him, standing at the door, looking at me and asking me if I was ok with his eyes. Oh fifty, no, I'm not ok and right now there's nothing I would love more than just cuddle next to you and forget all about the world.

"Christian, I'm sorry. It was José. He sent you that text and erased all your missed calls from my phone. I'm really sorry. I left my bag with him one time, to go to the bathroom and he just messed everything up. I'm so sorry" I say to him, already feeling the tears creeping down on me and before I know it he pulls me close to me and just holds me, stroking my hair and my back, letting me sob into his chest, and we just stay there, not saying anything for a while until I manage to push myself away from him and just say, between breaths "I'm sorry Christian. I just want to go home now. I need to sleep this off. I'm sorry". And with a soft nod he does as I ask and ushers me out of that dream house and into his car, and drives away, back to the cruel and twisted world I now despise and hate.

I guess faith is really not on my side and just like that, the most perfect night I have had in days is ruined and I'm left with sorrow and sadness. Will I ever have my happy ending or am I destined to a life of loneliness and regret?


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Ana *****

It was a silent ride back home, i wasn't really in the talkative mood and Christian understood that, but a big part of me felt guilty for taking out on him. After all he had been nothing but romantic and thoughtful toward me, but that little stunt from José had broken me down, and i was in serious need of a good night sleep to clear my head and figure out how to handle all of this.

"I'm sorry i messed up your plans for a very nice and romantic dinner. This all thing just killed the mood for me. I'm really sorry Christian" i finally manage to say to him, giving him a sad smile, and he says nothing, grabs my hand and gently rubs my knuckles, like he usually does to sooth me, and i have to say, it never fails. I feel immediately more relaxed and at peace, but also a little aroused and nervous to be this close to him. This man makes me feel like a stupid teenage girl in love by just touching my hand, it was unreal.

"It wasn't your fault Anastasia. I just hate not being able to help you right now" he says, giving me a sad smile back, still holding my hand and gently squeezing it.

"You're already helping by just doing what i asked you to do. I just want to sleep it off and figure this all out tomorrow with a fresh state of mind you know?" i ask him, receiving a gentle nod and a very small smile from him. I guess he felt a little better knowing that he was helping me right now.

"Good, everything looks better in the morning. And we are here! Should i come up?" he asks me, with a small grin gracing his gorgeous face. He sure was a deliciously good-looking man. And i bet he could make me feel much better if he did come up. What to do what to do...

"Hum, i..." i mumble, not being able to make up my mind.

"I guess it's better if i don't, you do look a little confused right now and i don't want to be another piece of the puzzle you need to figure out. But i would very much like to reschedule our dinner if you're still interested of course. It's up to you Anastasia" he says, always whispering, with such longing in his voice m head starts spinning instantly.

"I'm free on Friday. Tomorrow is José's gallery thing and i still don't know if I'm going or not so it's better to make it some other day. What you think?" i answer him, holding my breath, not knowing how he will react to the sudden mention of José's name and event.

"Friday is perfect. And about tomorrow, do what makes you feel better. Although i would be lying if i said i liked the idea of you being around that guy again after what he did." he says, staring at me and gripping the wheel a little too sternly, proving my suspicion, he was pissed at José and he wasn't happy with me being around him again. I guess i was getting the hang of this fifty shades thing at last.

"Yeah, i know. I'll just have to think about what i want to do. But Friday i am all yours Mr. Grey" i say, giving him a shy smile and unconscionably biting my lip.

"Hmm, i do like the idea of having you all to myself Miss Steele. And believe me, i do intent to make every second of it most gratifying for you Anastasia" he says, putting so much meaning in that promise i bet my knees would just melt beneath me if i wasn't still seated right next to him. And just like that, i feel myself get more and more turned on, my breathing accelerates and i can't help myself from licking my lips from the simple thought of having him pleasing me.

Of course he picks up on the sudden changes in me, and begins to shift in his seat, now facing me completely and then, starts to get closer and closer to me and with a swift and calculated move he plants a very soft but lustful kiss on my lips. I feel his breathing get heavier, filled with such fire i have to gather every strength in me to pull myself away from him, leaving the both of us to catch our breaths.

"I'll see Friday. Thank you for a very lovely night and have a safe drive home Mr. Grey" i say to him, unable to hide my recently flushed cheeks i shyly smile at him and await his response so i can, cordially, flee back to the safety of my small apartment.

"Friday can't come fast enough. Good night Anastasia, sweet dreams" he says, now with a full grin on his beautifully sculpted face. I did love playful Christian, one of my favourite shades no doubt.

And with a soft nod and a very innocent smile i exit the car, anxious to get in bed and start dreaming about Friday. He was right about that, it couldn't come fast enough.

***** Christian *****

That fucker had just ruined everything, our perfect night, ruined! Because he had to go and play Mr. right! Who the fuck did he think he was to make decisions about Anastasia's life? Sure, they were friends, a fact i, most of the times, chose to forget and hoped it would change, but still, he had no right to do that to her and frankly, i just think he fucked himself with that smooth move.

Anastasia was pissed and now, he probably had lost her as a friend. Of course i wasn't sad about that, the fucker obviously wanted my Ana for himself and that just pissed me off. But i could see how broken she was after his stupid stunt, and there was nothing worse than seeing her so disappointed and crushed over something i had no control over. All i wanted was to make her feel better and right now i felt so fucking helpless i hated him. If i got my hands on him, i would make him suffer ten times what he made her suffer.

All of the sudden she starts talking, apologizing about tonight, and i just can't help myself, i want to touch her and make her know how much i want her. And so i do, i grab her hand, her soft and warm hand, and gently start rubbing her fingers like i know she likes. And i can feel her relax almost immediately, and then i feel her starting to shiver and i notice her breathing begins to escalade. And just like that i know, Ana will be mine again, and no fucker called José what's his face or any other jackass will mess with us again. She belongs to me and i will make sure that she comes back to me, sooner than she expects. Because frankly, i was hanging by a very thin thread and any second close to her was getting me more and more aroused. I just couldn't be near her without feeling her pressed against my body, it felt wrong and i wasn't going to do it very much longer.

*** ... ***

It took all night but finally she had arrived home, and of course, that cocky bastard Grey was with her. I honestly didn't understand what she saw in that guy, other than the money of course. I never took her for the gold-digger type, but i guess people change when the right opportunity comes along. And what better chance to get your hooks on someone than doing it on a mildly handsome single billionaire excuse of a man?

But sadly for them, i had other plans for her, plans that ensured she was never going to get closer to him ever again. Oh good, she's opening the door. I guess it's show time. She's mine now and i'm going to enjoy every minute of her.


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Ana *****

Wow, tonight was definitely going to be one of the top 10 most confusing nights of my entire life. Between being with Christian in what truly felt like heaven on earth and finding out about José's stupid stunt, i would never thought that i would end up being kissed so passionately by my very own fifty and still return home, alone and extremely sexually frustrated.

I mean, he clearly wanted me just as much as i wanted him, and my inner goddess had spent all night urging me to take a step and just let him have me right there in that gorgeous cottage, but i knew that the first time i let him in again i wouldn't been able to get away from him ever again and i just didn't felt ready to even consider getting back to him. Everything was still very fresh and raw in my mind, and i needed time to get my shit together before embarking in the rollercoaster relationship awaiting me with Christian. And now here i was, finally home, emotionally drained and just ready to get myself curled into a ball and sleep my troubles away.

Then, all of the sudden, i felt a chill run down my whole body and i felt something was wrong. But before i could even turn the lights up, i felt the sting of a needle, strong arms grabbing me, my head spinning uncontrollably and then, complete darkness.

***** ... *****

Damn, she was completely oblivious to my presence, probably rambling in her head about the wonderful time that fucker had provided her. I swear to god, seeing him kiss her in his car made me want to vomit. The only reason why i didn't run downstairs to stop him and beat him into a pulp was because i needed to wait for her here, to make sure she was never getting back to his filthy arms again. My poor, innocent Ana, tainted by his power and influence. But never again. I was getting her out of here and i was going to make her forget all about him and their disgusting short life together. She was going to be mine and i was going to make sure she was happy and had everything she could wish for with me by her side. Yes, that was the plan.

"You're so beautiful Ana. I'm so lucky to finally have you in my arms again. I can't wait to show you what i have planned for us and to see your gorgeous smile when you realize you don't have to be with that fucker Grey ever again. You're safe now baby, i'm going to take care of you" i whisper to her, stroking her smooth hair and touching her chest to make sure she was still breathing. I mean, the drug i gave her wasn't that strong but Ana was skinny and i was a little scared i might have overdosed the whole thing. But thankfully she was breathing, and she looked like she was at peace, at last. Now was time to get her out of here and into safety.

So i grabbed her in my arms, lied her down in her couch and went to fetch her bag i had previously filled with some essentials my princess would need to keep looking beautiful as always. And then i started to write a note , so that Kate wouldn't flip out when she came home and realized Ana was missing. I then typed an email using Ana's phone and personal account, officially resigning from her job at SIP. Yes, everything was ready and nobody was going to be worried about her.

After i had the bag in my hand i grabbed her and cradled like a baby, shielding her with one of her long coats so she wouldn't get cold and to make sure nobody saw that i was carrying her outside. I wasn't in the mood to answer questions or raise suspicions about this.

I gently walked into my car, placed her in the back seat so she would be comfortable and made sure the doors were locked, just in case she woke up in panic and decided to do something stupid like jumping out of a moving car.

When everything was secure and Ana was soundly asleep in the back, i started driving towards our destination, completely satisfied by my performance tonight. She was finally with me and now i could love her like she deserved.

After about three hours driving, a couple of stops to stretch my legs and make sure she was still asleep and comfortable, we arrived. I was beyond excited and i couldn't wait to have her full awake so we could get started on our life together. I truly felt like a teenager in love and i didn't care, she was the love o f my life and i had to save her, from him and most important from herself. Everything was going to be ok now, and we were going to be very happy together no doubt about that!

***** Ana *****

I opened my eyes and i found myself in a huge field filled with wild flowers, birds chipping away and the sound of a cascade invading my every senses. This had to be heaven because it was so peaceful and calm i could stay here forever. Then i looked at myself and i was dressed in a clean cut, white dress, so innocent like an angel would wear. I got up only to feel my feet rubbed against the grass, enjoying its freshness and taking in the overwhelming smell of pure and untainted nature around me.

Yes, this had to be heaven. But then, that meant i had to be...dead? No, i didn't feel dead, i felt more alive than ever before. I felt happy, carefree, young and blessed! I couldn't be dead could i? And then i see him, the impersonation of perfection himself, staring at me with those breath taking grey eyes and that million dollar smile. He was perfect in every way and now, wearing nothing but white linen pants and barefoot, i could see him for what he really was, he was the most beautiful angel i have ever seen, beautiful and still dangerous.

With a swift movement, he was in front of me, his lips brushing against mine, his heavy breathing rivalling mine, his hands awaiting my approval and then, without a word, i was his and he was mine. Our bodies moved, in unison, stroking, touching, kissing, licking, pulling and making every second count. We had been away from each other too long, and peace and calm were replaced for longing and lust. In his arms i could be truly happy, in his embrace i could be myself again, i could be whole again.

And just as it began, it ended. I was abruptly forced back into reality by someone calling my name and gently shoving me awake. I tried to open my eyes and make sense of the situation, but whatever i had been drugged with was still in my system and i just couldn't help but feel that no matter what awaited for me when i finally awoke, that peaceful and blissful place was where i wanted to be. I just didn't know just how much i would miss it in a few minutes.

"Wake up Ana! It's about time girl. Stop being lazy and just wake up love, we have so much to do" he said, with such excitement in his tone you would think he had just won the lottery or something like that.

"W-what? Where am i? What's happening?" i managed to mumble, almost inaudible, but somehow he could hear me just fine. I guess i was just too drugged to even hear myself properly.

"You're safe at last. Don't worry. I'm going to take care of you Ana. You're ok now" he assured me, but i couldn't help a feeling of unease about this whole thing. And besides, i was too drugged to make sense of the face standing in front of me let alone his voice. It felt somewhat familiar but still alien to me. Damn, this drug was strong! Or i was too weak. Either way, i needed to pull myself together because i could feel him getting closer and closer and just before i could manage a sentence, he grabbed me and pulled me to his chest, i guess. After brushing a strand of hair from my face, he kissed me, long and hard, his tongue invading my mouth, violating and dominating. I wanted to stop him, but i was too weak. I tried to push him away but ended up in the same place, in his strong arms, still being tortured by that mouth, so unfamiliar and unwanted it made my stomach sick and i felt like throwing up. Maybe then he would let go of me and i could get some grip on myself. But after a few disgusting and agonizing minutes he freed me, letting me catch my breath.

"You're delicious baby. I'm going to make you so happy Ana, just you wait and see. You are mine now" he said, causing my whole body to stiffen and dry up. This man, still unidentified to me, had drugged me, was kissing me against my will and now was promising me happiness. And i was his? What the hell? I had to sober up, i needed to figure out who he was before i could do anything else! He clearly was deluded and i was starting to get really scared for my safety. All i could think was that dreamy place and my fifty, all i wanted was to go back there and forget all about this sickening man in front of me.

"Stop. I don't know you! I don't want you! Let me go please" i begged him, desperately trying to reason with the obviously mad man.

"Ana baby, of course you know me. You're known me for so long. And you don't need to worry, you're safe now. Nobody will take you away from me ever again. I promise you that. You are mine forever" he said, and just like that, i felt myself numb to the possibility of never seeing Christian again and i knew, in that moment, that if i could ever flee this crazy man, i would go to him, no matter how far i was and i would tell him just how much i loved him. he was my one true love and i would fight till the end to be in his embrace once more.

"Now, we need to get you sober up. We have a lot to do" he says, grabbing both of my arms and ushering me somewhere, i don't know where, still drugged and numbed from the fear. _Christian please! Find me! I need you! I love you!_ i pray, hoping that somehow, he would feel it and make his way in here to save me, my fifty in shiny armour!

***** Christian *****

It was now 3am and i couldn't sleep. Except this time, i was anxious about seeing Ana again. I couldn't wait for Friday to come so i could hold my beautiful woman in my arms. She truly was a beauty, in every sense of the word, and she evoked emotions in me that were foreign, until now. I wanted her, and i wasn't going to give up on her for as long as she gave me reasons to keep fighting. I could make her happy and for once, i felt like i deserved to be happy, but with her, no other woman could make me feel the way she did. I needed her, she was my salvation. Ana was the hero of my very dark and twisted story and i was going to make sure she saved me and i spent every day rewarding her for it.

And just like that, thinking about her with me, for the rest of my life, i felt myself relax and fall into deep sleep. She truly was the best remedy for my troubling mind, and she would be mine again.


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Ana *****

"Ok baby, drink this, it's black coffee, no sugar, so you can perk up a little faster. I am really sorry about drugging you, but i couldn't risk having you throw a hissy fit and making too much noise. I had to bring you back to safety unarmed and in peace" he said, sounding truly sorry and repentant. If he wasn't a sick bastard, kidnapper, excuse of a man, i might actually believe his sweet words. But now i was sobering up, and i could fell myself get fired up by the minute.

"You brought me here, wherever this is, against my will. You kidnapped me! And you want me to feel safe here, alone with you? You are out of your goddamn mind!" i fought back, now completely pissed off and as soon as my vision cleared up i could see him, my attacker and i couldn't believe my eyes. I rubbed them a couple of times, trying to see if it was just a sick dream, but no, he was there, in front of me, looking dumbfounded. And then i felt it, my body collapsed on me and i fainted.

"Ana! Ana baby! Wake up please! Please! It's ok! You're safe here" he yells at me, slapping me gently on the cheeks, pushing my arms and trying to wake me up. But even though i could hear him perfectly i couldn't bring myself to open my eyes again. The shock was too raw for me. There in front of me, screaming and pushing me awake, stood one of the people i thought i could trust the most and someone i actually liked a lot, my stepfather Bob!

I just couldn't believe it, it wasn't true, it couldn't be. I would have pinched myself if i could move at all, but my body hat shut down completely. He couldn't do this to me, not him, not to me. He had always been someone to rely on, even though i didn't really consider him a father figure i still hold a lot of respect for him and his relationship to my mother. Oh my god, my mother, how could he do this to her? To both of us?! He had drugged me, kidnapped me and now held me against my will. This wasn't the man i knew and cared for so much, this was a crazy man, driven by insanity and delusions. This man truly scared me to death, and just like that, my mind joined my body and i collapsed completely.

I woke up with sun in my face, feeling my entire body stiffened by the awkward position i had myself slumber on, i was curled up in a ball, my head resting in some tacky old lady like pillows that smelled just like an old lady would. I was dizzy, tired, hungry but most of all, broken. How could someone go from being almost like a father to you to become someone that you feared and disgusted all at once? I mean, this man was my mother's husband, she loved him and trusted him enough to bring him into our lives and now here he was, throwing it all away and for what? I couldn't make sense of his motives and i was quite scared to even imagine what he was thinking about doing with me now.

"Ana, are you feeling better? Do you think we can talk now?" he says,sitting next to me, he starts staring at me, trying to make sense of how i'm feeling i guess. Grossed out that's how i'm feeling right now!

"Why are you doing this? I thought you loved my mother! She trusted you! I trusted you!" i tell at him, keeping my tears from appearing, i wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of seeing me break down in front of him! Not now!

"And i do, i love her very much, but ever since i met you i felt something i knew i shouldn't feel at all, that's why i kept my distance, i couldn't bear to have you loving me as a father when my feelings for you were nowhere near what a father should feel for his daughter. Ana i tried so very hard to cast those emotions away, i tried to become the person i knew i should be but i can't do it any more. I love you more than i cal tell and i can't keep living a lie, i can't keep lying to myself, your mother and you. I love you. I want you. And now, we can be together. Tell me you feel the same way Ana please! I need you!" he says, so passionately and romantically you could actually feel bad for his anguish and longing, if this wasn't a fucked up situation all together. And then, he starts to lean on me and tries to kiss me, but i push him off. He keeps pulling me to him, and since he's a well built up man he had no trouble to force himself on me, regardless of my clear pleads to let me go. And then i feel it, his rough tongue, disgusting and foul smelling, forcing its way into my mouth, filling me with sickening saliva and swirling its way like it's nobody's business. And before i can help it, i throw up all over him. Everything i had been keeping to myself i manage to just vomit all over him, making him stand up immediately and step away from me.

"God Ana! What the fuck! Eww! Are you sick or something? Here, let me take you to the bathroom" he says, looking utterly disgusted and trying to usher me into the bathroom outside of the room i'm in.

"No! Let go of me! I don't want anything to do with you! I will never feel anything for you! Ever! You are a fucking twisted son of a bitch and all you make me feel for you is loathing and repulsion! Don't you dare touch me ever again or i swear to god i will kill you with my bare hands! You fucking psycho! " i yell at him, now full on pissed mode! How the fuck did i let myself fall into this situation? How could i not see this coming! I mean, this man was my stepfather long enough, i should have seen some signs, something! Or maybe he just got completely mental and was having a god damn breakdown! Either way, i was screwed!

"Fine! Sit in your own shit for all i care! I'm going to get cleaned up!" he blurts out, leaving the room as fast and silently as he came in. Fuck, what was i going to do now? I was locked in a house, with a deranged man, without my phone or any means to communicate with the outside world...But wait, was i locked? I haven't tried that, i simply assumed i was. So i stand up, feeling myself way too dizzy for my taste and start walking out of the room, careful not to make a sound. I try to find the door that leaves to freedom and after a few minutes of searching there she is, shining for me. I try my best not to run into it and make a fool out of myself so i calmly and so very quietly walk towards the door and when i turn the knob the door opens!

What? It's open? What kind of kidnapping is this? I lose no more time dwelling on his incompetence as a kidnapper, i open the door and walk out, closing it behind me, slowly and without making a noise, hoping he wouldn't notice me gone until it was too late. But then, i realize why the door was open. I'm in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by dense woods and without a sound other than the birds and what not. I was screwed, but it was now or never, i had to get out of here and fight my way out of this nightmare! Then i remember my father daughter lessons and making good use of my knowledge of the wild i become aware of the sun setting, so i know where i'm going after all. And just like that i start running, my mind set on freedom and not tripping and falling on my face.

I run and run for what feels like hours, until i feel myself getting more tired and weaker by the minute. So i find a secluded spot, perfect for hiding just in case he was following me and i sit down, gathering my breath and resting my feet, rubbing them to avoid causing any more blisters than the ones i'm with already. A few minutes of peaceful resting and then i hear something, footsteps coming my way.

My immediate reaction is too get out of here and start running again, but i know i won' be going very far in my current condition, so i push myself deeper into my makeshift cave, trying to literally make myself disappear. And then i see him, walking with a flashlight and something that looks like a compass of some kind. Oh right, he sucks at this things, living in the wild. I guess that's one point for me then, thanks to my dad and his lessons on how to survive anywhere in the world. Oh my dad, if he was here i would be safe! He would kill this son of a bitch and take me back home to safety. I miss him so much right now!

"Fuck! She's fast! Where the hell could she be right now? Fuck! I should have locked that fucking door! Stupid stupid stupid!" he starts talking to himself, and i start to get a bit panicked because he's still here, very close to me. Just go away! Leave me alone!

"Fuck this! She won't go far without a phone, money or a compass. She'll be back. Yeah, i'm going back home, maybe she's even there now. Yeah, that sounds like my Ana" he starts mumbling to himself and just as fast as he appeared he's gone. Damn, he was sneaky! That wasn't good for me. But at least he was gone. I think. Just in case, i keep myself very still, listening to every sound and after a couple of minutes i'm pretty sure he's gone. I start to make my way out of my hiding place and looking towards the way he went , i can see him very far away, stomping and fastening his pace, probably thinking i would be back home to welcome him with open arms. Jackass! I would welcome him with a shotgun that's what!

So, after putting my shoes back on and making sure i was well rested, i start to walk again, again, checking for the sun and making sure i wasn't going in circles. I keep walking for a while, this time slowing my pace, to minimize my exhaustion. I mean, given my already weakened state i shouldn't really push myself too far if i wanted to get back into civilization anytime soon. And then, after a very painful and tiring walk, i start hearing noises. I stop and i concentrate all my efforts in making some sense of those noises. I wanted to go home but i didn't want to find myself caught up in some worse situation that i was already. But then i realize, the sounds are from people talking about silly things, doors opening and closing, cars stopping their motors and starting again, and when i get a little bit closer i see it, a gas stop, filled with families and people going on their normal days.

I waste no time, i start running and crying for help. I feel my cheeks getting wetter by the second, but the feeling of freedom and relief is heightened. All of the people there rush to my side, asking me what's wrong and making sure i get some water first, given my wrecked condition. I then try to explain what happened, living out the association i have to my kidnapper. I'm hugged and assured by a sweet woman, that makes sure i get something to eat before telling me that she will drive me back home and go with me to the police if i want to.~

"Thank you so much! But right now, i just want to go home, i need to get home. Please!" i beg her, and with that she ushers me back to her car, where her two young daughters are waiting for her.

"Girls, this is a friend of mine. We are going to give her a ride home ok?" she starts to explain to her kids, leaving out the details of my situation. Bless her heart for that.

"Ok mommy!" they both reply, as clueless and innocent as any child should be.

"Thank you so much for this. I will never be able to repay you for what you are doing. Thank you" i start to say, making my very best not to cry in front of her or the girls.

"Please, there's no need for any of that. What happened was horrible and i will help you in any way i can. Just make sure you get some rest. We still have a long way to go honey" she says, looking as sweet and motherly as anyone could. I miss my mom so much right now. Oh crap, i have to call my mom, make sure she knows the creep she has been living for years.

"I know this might be way too much of me to ask, but i really need to tell my mother where i was and what happened. It's really important" i beg her, holding my breath for a second before she hands me her blackberry, not even thinking about it for a second. I mean, this woman was like a freaking angel and i was being saved by her without giving her anything back. My faith in humanity was slowly being restored thanks to her.

"Thank you so much." i say, not being able to hold one lonely teat from running down my left cheek. I was really overwhelmed by this woman.

"Honey, just stop thanking me and talk to your mom. She will want to know about what happened i'm sure" she says, giving me a reassuring smile and turning her gaze back to the road ahead, giving me privacy and time to process how to break this terrible news to my loving mother. She was going to be devastated but i had to do this. She deserved to know the truth.

So i dial her number, thank god i knew it from memory, and after the second beep she picks up, sounding all cheery and happy to hear news from her daughter. And just like that i break, i start sobbing as hard as humanly possible, unable to form words, i just cry for a few minutes. And before i can stop this horrible display of raw emotions, my saviour pulls up in a dirt road parallel to the drive way and ushers the girls out of the car, giving me the much needed privacy to endure this painful conversation.

"M-mom! I'm so sorry! I am really sorry mom" i blurt out, feeling ashamed of how this was all happening because of his infatuation with me. I knew i should blame myself, but the masochist in me felt like this was all my fault, like i had given him some missed signals to make him feel attracted to me.

"Ana you're scaring me. Please, try to calm down honey and just tell me what's going on. Are you ok?" she starts saying, already anxious and afraid for what may be happening to me right now.

"Mom, i was drugged and kidnapped! By Bob! He did this to me! I have been held against my will since last night. I don't even know where i was. I just managed to run away a couple of minutes ago! He has my phone, my clothes, everything! He's crazy mom! He says he loves me, that he has always been in love with me and that he just couldn't fight anymore! I swear i didn't want this! I didn't even like him that much, you know that! I trusted him because you trusted him and loved him! But he's a fucking bastard mom! He's completely insane" i say, almost without breathing, letting it all out, like an exorcism! I could feel her breathing getting heavier and heavier by every word i said. Oh mom, please believe me!

"Ana stop that right now! What the hell is wrong with you?! Are you drunk or something? Anastasia, this is no laughing matter! You are out of your mind! Bob would never do anything like that to you, e loves you! Like a daughter! He cares about you and he has been nothing but good to you all this years! How could you even think about him doing this to you?! I can't believe you would even think let alone say something like that! You are the one who's crazy Anastasia and i don't think i can talk to you right now! Get it together Ana! And stop making up stories like that! You are not a child anymore! This is unacceptable!" she says, completely breaking my heart into a million pieces and making me cry even more uncontrollably.

If there was a hell on earth, i had just walked in on it.


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Ana *****

My mother, the woman that was always there for me, always, didn't believe me. She was pissed at me for lying about the man she loved, and i couldn't blame her. i couldn't believe it myself when i first saw him, it was completely unreal. But now, after hearing her say that she did not believe me at all, my whole world shattered and i felt myself sinking deeper and deeper into the dark path my life had taken. The one person that i could always rely on had just abandoned me and now, i was truly and irrevocably alone.

"I'm going now, i can't do this now. I'm really disappointed in you Ana. I never thought you could do this to me, to Bob. But i guess i was wrong." she says, and with that, ends the conversation and leaves me to my never ending sobbing and crushing feeling of loneliness and helplessness. Who could i turn to now? If my mother didn't believe me, who would? And then, one name comes to my mind, like a whisper, and i knew that if i wanted to come out of this dark place i found myself in, i had to tell him what had happened to me and hope for dear life that he would believe me. He had to. I wouldn't survive this if he too denied my truth.

"Are you ok sweetie?" my angel asks, entering the car again, her girls sitting safely and buckling her seatbelts behind me. I could see the confusion splashed across her face but i couldn't talk about it, not right now, the feeling was too fresh, too raw.

"I'm fine. Thank you. We can go now. Thank you so much for lending me the phone" i say, giving her a small smile, trying to reassure her that i was ok, but failing miserably, causing her to gently grab my hand and squeezing it, in the hopes that this small sign of affection and understanding would light up my world a tiny little bit. I mean, this woman, that had never met me before, believed me and was doing everything in her power to help me and make me feel safe and better about this whole thing. And my mother had literally pushed me away. What kind of fucked up world was this, where you couldn't even depend on your loved ones to keep you safe? My life had literally been struck by a fucking tornado, broken pieces everywhere and nowhere to turn to but grief and sorrow.

Finally, my body cave in, and i felt myself falling into the warm embrace of the dream land i craved so much. Maybe there my life would make some sense and i could actually be happy. Because right now, that was not going to happen at all and i was tired of feeling helpless.

***** Christian *****

"What? What do you mean she's not there?" i yell at the delivery boy, feeling already annoyed by his obvious incompetence. What a difficult task, deliver a gorgeous, and i might add, huge bouquet of red roses to a beautiful woman. Some people were just born to be useless.

"I-I'm sorry Mr. Grey. I asked about Miss Steele but they told me she wasn't there. That she had resigned yesterday."

"What the fuck are you talking about? Fuck this, stay there, i'll meet you there" i yell at the already frantic guy. What the hell was he talking about? Ana was loving her job at SIP, she wouldn't just leave. Maybe i should call her and get this straightened out first. Yeah, good idea. I dial her number immediately, eager to get to the bottom of all this and there's no the hell, no signal? What the fuck is going on?

"Taylor, bring the car around, we're going to Miss Steele's house right now!" i yell at my phone. There was something wrong, i could feel it. Anastasia wasn't one to pull a stunt like this off out of the blue. Something was going on and i needed to know what.

"I'm here sir" Taylor says

After a fast drive to Ana's place, i can't help but think that if something is truly wrong, and if she's hurt i will lose my mind. I walk towards the door of the building and after 5 attempts, she doesn't pick up. What the hell? Is she avoiding me? Is she even home? I decide to check for her car. Yes, the car is here, so she should be home. Could she be sleeping? Fuck, the anxiety is killing me so i decide to make good use of my stalker moves. I call Finch and ask him the combination of the building front door. Maybe it was too much of a stalker move but now was no time to dwell on such formalities. I needed to see Ana, make sure she was alive and well before taking her across my knee for making me worry like a fucking fool. I arrive at her door, and after many attempts, she still doesn't open the door. Ok, this was starting to freak me the hell out. She wouldn't be this stupid to avoid me here, at her door. I seriously consider breaking in, but i restrain myself. Instead i call Taylor and usher him upstairs, so he can pick the lock of her door and let me in. Yes, Taylor was definitely a man of many trades and i was glad to have him on my side.

After a few seconds, i'm finally in her apartment and Ana is nowhere to be seen. I walk around, trying to make sense of the situation, looking for any clue that would indicate where she was or who she was or if she was ok. And then, on top of her kitchen table was a note, not written by her obviously, her handwriting was much more gracious and perfect. The note says she's leaving, with someone called Bob. I recognise the name but not the person. It also says she resigned from SIP and she's going to live with Bob somewhere south. What? What the fuck is going on? Who de fuck is Bob? Bob, Bob, Bob! Fuck! Her stepfather of course! What? She's leaving with her stepfather? Ok, this is not right! Something is seriously wrong here and i'm officially losing my mind.

"Fitch, get me the number for Ana's stepfather Bob something! Now!" i yell at my phone, now full on pissed and raged mode. She wouldn't do this, not my Ana! She wouldn't leave me, not now, and with her fucking stepfather! She couldn't! She wouldn't!

"Sir, what is going on?" Taylor asks, obviously concerned about my fully enraged mood.~

"Read it" i give him the note, letting him make his own conclusions. I'm in no mood to talk right now. I need to see Ana stat!

"Sir, this doesn't seem like something Miss Steele would do. There's something wrong here" he finally says, bringing me back from my dark place.

"I agree. She wouldn't do this. There's something seriously fucked up going on right now. But i bet she's with her stepfather right now. I bet she is" i say, truly believing my words. My Ana wouldn't do this, and if she wouldn't do this, she was been held against her will by someone she trusted. And just like that i knew i had to find her, bring her home and make sure that the person hurting her would die a horrible death.

"Sir, his phone is disconnected! No other contacts known." Finch says.

Fuck, this day just got a lot worse. Where are you Ana?

***** Ana *****

I woke up, feeling a little uncomfortable, like i had been upside down or something for a while. My head felt funny, i was kind of dizzy and every sound was muffled. My muscles hurt and i felt incredibly thirsty. And then i rubbed my stomach to ease the sudden pain i felt and i could feel it, blood, all over my belly and some on my legs. I tried to look to my left, and when i did, i saw her, my saviour, my angel, the one person that was helping me back to safety, eyes closed, her head dropped on the steering wheel, a huge cut on her forehead still gushing blood. I looked behind me and i could see her little girls crying and trying to release her selves from the seatbelts, but failing every time they did, causing them to cry out in pain, i presume, given my faulty hearing i wasn't sure. Immediately i felt an urge to help them, to keep them safe, but when i tried to take my own seatbelt, i felt the most agonizing pain in my life! Looking down, i realized something i hadn't seen before, i was literally impaled to the car by the front of the car, completely crushing my legs and making it impossible for me to move them. And then i noticed the most unusable thing, i saw a tree with big roots, but those roots weren't connected to the ground as they should be, they were connected to the sky, and the sky was incredibly dark and muddy and...OH NO! it wasn't the tree that was in the wrong position, we were! The car was upside down and that's why we couldn't take our seatbelts off! We were trapped in this trashed car and there was no living soul around to hear us scream and cry for help!

"Please! Someone! Help us! Please! We need help!" i cried, as loud as i possibly could, actually being able to hear a little of it so that must have been loud. And then, as soon as i woke up, i fell asleep again, pushing the pain away and i let myself go into the warm cradle of oblivion.


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Christian *****

"Sir, i found something!" Finch says, bringing me back from my very dark place. It had been two days since i had last heard anything from Ana herself and i was starting to get seriously afraid for her well being. I mean, after reading that note i just knew she wasn't ok and i had to get to her, but so far, every piece of information we had on this Bob character was worthless. The man was obviously covering his tracks and he was pretty good at doing it. But he wasn't better than me or my team, and now i was more than pissed, i was on a man hunt and i wouldn't stop until i found him and Ana. My Anastasia, i just wanted to be with her and tell her how much i had missed her.

"What?" i yell at him, unaware of my tone until i see him flinch a little. Wow, i must seem utterly scary right now. Good.

"The man has a property somewhere in the woods, just outside of Seattle. It doesn't show on his IRS files, so i guess he wanted to keep it hidden or something. It's a few hours' drive from here so we should get going immediately. I have the GPS coordinates, we're good to go." he says.

"Ok. Let's go!" i say, already rushing out of the door, eager to find my Anastasia and hold her in my arms once again, this time, determined not to lose her, ever again.

As i got into the car, my phone started ringing and subconsciously i picked it up, hoping to god it was Ana on the other end. But as soon as i pick up, i regret almost immediately doing so.

"Ana?" i say, every bit of my body earning to hear her voice once more.

"I'm sorry dear, no Ana for you here." she says, sounding as condescending as ever. God, i was beginning t o really load this woman. Ana was right, she was a bitch.

"I don't have time for your bullshit. I'm busy." i say, ready to shut down that call, when she stops me on my tracks almost instantly.

"I've got Anastasia. Do i have your time now?"she says, making me stop breathing for a minute...What? What the hell? How? And more important, why the hell would she have Anastasia? I don't like this, and if there's anyone that knows what this bitch can do it's me, and now i was truly scared for Ana's sake.

"If you want to ever see her again you will do everything i say when i say it. Understood?" she says, before i can even blurt out a word out of my mouth. That's it, i was full on pissed right now.

"You're lying! If Anastasia is indeed with you, put her on the phone, give me proof! Now!" i yell at her, hoping to dear god she was in fact lying just to get something out of me. I couldn't think of anything worse than having Ana in Elena's hands. I had been there, and i knew how vicious and cold those hands could be.

"She's asleep. But she is fine. For now. And if you do as i say, she will go back home, safe and sound." she says, sounding truly confident in her words, full dominating mode now. She wasn't lying, Ana was really with her, and now i was going for blood!

"You listen to me Elena. If any harm comes to Anastasia, i will make sure you pay every bit of it. You mark my words. You hurt her and i will kill you!" i sneer at her, careful to make my tone as dangerous and filled with evil as i possibly could. Inside i was petrified, but now was the time to put my fifty shades at use.

"Christian, don't threat me. I know how much you care about this dull girl and as long as you do what i want, she will be safe. You have my word." she says, sounding honest and sympathetic. What a bitch! I would rip her throat out for doing this to me, and to Ana! My sweet Anastasia, she would be better off not knowing me at all. I knew that, i always knew. But now was too late, she had been caught in my fucked up life and i had to get her back. I just had to.

"What do you want Elena? Why are you doing this?" i asked her, keeping the anguish and sorrow off my voice, not letting her know just how destructed i felt at this point.

"I want you Christian. You know i love you. You deserve to be loved by someone who can give you what you need and desire. And little old Anastasia is not that person. You are mine and i want you to stop settling for less than what you deserve. That's all i want. You my dear" she says, causing my stomach to role on itself. I actually had to control my gag reflex. She was insane, lunatic. She was truly crazy. How the hell could i love someone like her? She was insane enough to kidnap Ana and hold her hostage because she claimed to love me.

"Elena, i will never love you. No matter how many times you say you do, you have no idea what real love looks like. You couldn't love even if it was the last thing you could do. You are a crazy, unbalanced, ridiculous excuse of a woman. And when i find you, i will make you regret ever standing in my way. I will find you. You have my word." i say, calm and confident, my dominant side taking over. And as i said it, i ended the conversation. She had burned every bridge in our already fucked up friendship, and i was taking no prisoners. She was fucked.

"Sir, Finch has Mrs. Lincoln location. We are heading there now" Taylor says, aware of my not so friendly mood at this point. Good. I guess Finch's idea to trace every call made to my phone the past two days was finally paying off. He had suggested it after considering this whole Ana disappearance to be a personal attack against myself. I guess he was right.

"Good. I can wait to get my hands on that bitch!" i blurt out. Every bit of me wanted revenge, on the woman who had shaped my entire life and was now trying to destroy it.

An hour drive and we were here. Apparently she hadn't been to careful to hide her location, which was weird. The call was traced back to a Motel, not very far from Seattle. It wasn't exactly her style to choose places like this, but i guess she reserved this place for special occasions.

"Sir, maybe you should wait here. Let me check to see if she's alone or not" Taylor says, but i refuse to just stand still, knowing damn well Ana might be in serious danger.

"Not a chance in hell. I'm going. Just make sure you get Anastasia out of there as soon as we get in. I'll deal with Elena." i say, not giving him space for arguing.

"Ok. Stay behind me until i clear the place." Taylor says, to which i node in agreement. After all, he was the professional and i trusted his judgement.

We make our way into the crappy Motel, and stop and the reception. Crap, we had no time for this.

"Hello. My name is Callie. Would you like a room?" she says, pausing a little too long on my face, probably recognising me. It's just a face love.

"Do you have anyone by the name of Elena Lincoln staying here?" Taylor asks, relieving me from this ridiculous task. I mean, there was someone trapped in one of their rooms and she obviously had no fucking clue. Great job at monitoring this place.

"Yes we do. But i can't give you the room number, it's against regulations. I'm sorry sir." she says, looking truly sorry for this inconvenient. Ok, that's it.

"Listen to me. If you don't tell me what i want to know i will buy this poor excuse of a Motel just so i can fire you and everyone else in it and then i'll take the information anyway. Now, the room number." i say, business man taking over me.

"S-sorry sir. O-Of course. Mrs. Lincoln is staying in room 12. Do you need someone to take you there?" she says, now completely scared for her job. Good.

"No. We'll manage" Taylor says, signalling me to follow him.

When we finally get to room 12 i fight the urge to just barge in and kill that bitch. Instead i let Taylor do his thing. He decides to play a trick on Elena, and pulls the fire alarm, conveniently close to her room. Then we wait for her to open the door. A few seconds after, the door opens and a very confused and irritated Elena walks out. When she locks eyes with me, i see nothing but fear splashed across her face. Yes, she should be scared.

And before she could say a word, Taylor grabs her, wraps her hands behind her back and pushes her back into her room. He was good i'll give him that.

"Where's Anastasia?" i ask confused, after looking around the entire room to find nobody else but Elena herself.

"I don't know." she says, with a hint of malice to her tone.

"Elena, where is she? Tell me now!"i yell at her, unable to hide my frantic state. She was playing a dangerous game here.

"I only told you that because i knew you wouldn't stop until you were with your precious Anastasia again!" she says, futilely trying to get free.

"You lied?" i ask her, not sure what to believe anymore.

"Yes, i did. I needed to get you alone. Now you are mine my love" and as she says this, i hear a gunshot, Taylor falls unconsciously on the floor and before i can make sense of what's happening, i'm knocked out by something hard. And before i close my eyes and embrace darkness, i see her twisted and cruel smile.

I was fucked, and right now, Ana was still missing. My sweet Ana, i will find you. Always.


	14. Chapter 14

**I am so sorry for the huge delay in updates, but unfortunately i was involved in a motorcycle accident and was hospitalized for a few days. I wasn't exactly in shape to write so i let myself get better so i could bring you something worth reading. I have to say, i was inspired by this whole thing. I hope you like what i have for you, and again, sorry for the delay. I'll try to keep myself from being hospitalized any time soon ;)**

**Disclaimer: ****I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** ? *****

"Hello Ana. I missed you my beautiful girl." whispers a strange but kind of familiar voice. I can't really put my finger on it, but somehow, the tone of this voice, warm and friendly, makes me feel safe and at peace.

"I can't see you. Who are you? Where am i?" I ask, confused by the amount of light and absence of shades. This was a weird place to be in, I felt like someone had flashed a light straight into my eyes and I couldn't see anything but light. But even weirder was the calm in my heart. I was safe here, that I knew.

"Don't worry honey, you'll see better in no time. Here, take my hand, I'll help you. Trust me." The voice whispers again. I do as it said. Crazy as it might be to trust someone I couldn't even see, deep down I felt protected. And I swear I could feel some kind of calming aura emanating from this mystery person, wrapping around me, soothing my heart and telling me that everything was going to be ok.

As soon as I touch the palm of this person's hand, I feel the softest breeze circling me, awakening me, turning light into colors, shapes and shades, unraveling the beauty of the place I was in. And it was a sight I had never seen before. To say it was beautiful was an understatement at its best. This place could certainly rival with heaven, if such place existed. It truly was a wonderful sight for my very overwhelmed heart.

"I never thought such pure beauty existed on earth. Where are we?" I say, fascinated by this mystery place . And as I turn left, I finally see the person next to me. Someone I had never seen before but had loved very much regardless. It was Franklin, my biological father, who died the day after I was born. A big part of me always wondered how life would have been had he not died that day. But seeing him now, filled my eyes with tears and my heart felt relieved and soothed. Here he was, helping me and making me feel safe, like a good father should.

"Hello sweetie. I missed you baby. So much." he says, softly pulling me into his arms and embracing me , letting me sob into his chest, gently stroking my hair, reminding me of the man I loved so much.

"Dad, how is this possible? " I whisper against his chest, not wanting to part from his just yet. This was a moment I had dreamed for years, always wishing things to have been different.

"I'm going to help you get back to your life. This is not your place. Not yet" he says, still caressing my head.

"What do you mean? You're here. Why can't I stay here a bit longer dad?" I say to him, now looking into his eyes, trying to understand why he wants me out of this mesmerizing place.

"Because this place is for those whose life as ended. Yours has just begun my sweet girl." he says, grabbing my hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"But I don't want to leave you. I waited so long to see you dad." I whisper, trying my best to keep the water works from rolling down my warm cheeks.

"I never left you sweetie. I am always with you, in your heart." He says, brushing a strand of my hair from my face. In this moment I can't help but feel sad for everything we lost together, every birthday, school dance and first date. He had been taken from me too soon and now I wanted to keep him with me a little bit longer. But he looks like a man on a mission and gives me no time to argue. He just takes my hand, firmly and with that, everything around me starts to spin, everything goes white again and I have to close my eyes to avoid getting nauseated. Damn, this was why I hated roller coasters!

***** Elena *****

He looks so peaceful right now, sleeping in my arms. I notice he doesn't flinch from my touch and even though that's probably due to his unconscious state, I can't help but feel extreme happiness for it. He never let me touch him, that was a hard limit for him, and I respected it. But he was so delicious I found it hard to keep my hands off of his perfectly chiseled body.

And it wasn't like he would wake up and stop me. He probably was out for the rest of the day, that imbecile had knocked him out so hard, I felt my heart stop when I saw him fall on his head and close his eyes. But after a fast check out, I could breathe of relieve, my sweet boy was alive and well.

And now, I could enjoy every second of his marvelous presence. His scent was intoxicating, I loved his perfume, suited him perfectly. Although I knew he would smell heavenly in anything, he was perfect and now he was mine. Finally, things were exactly how they should be. No drama, no nonsense, just the two of us, together and in love.

"How is our dear guest?" he asks, startling me and bringing me back from my very happy place.

"How the fuck do you think he is? He's alive at least! You could have killed him you moron!" I yell at him, completely annoyed to have to deal with this jackass now. All I wanted was to be alone with Christian and not be interrupted every five minutes with stupid questions. I was surrounded by idiots and I had no patience for this bullshit right now.

"I guess i miscalculated his ability to take a hit. My bad." he says back, obviously joking and showing no remorse at all. I hated his guts already, but unfortunately I still needed him. For now at least. Things would change and I was going to take my revenge for his lack of control. I mean, he could have made serious damage to my beautiful man, and that would be the end of me. I loved him exactly like this, perfect in every way. I wouldn't know how to deal if anything disturbed that perfection.

"Get out before i test your ability to take a hit!" I say back, every word spoke with coolness and malice, making clear my feelings towards this whole mess.

"I did what we agreed. That's it. But i'll leave, 'cause this is getting too sweet for my taste anyway." He says, filled with anger and disgust. Like I gave a fuck about his emotions right now. He fucked up and I wasn't letting him off the hook anytime soon. And besides, annoying him was a great way to pass the time. At least until my lovely man woke up.

"Then leave already. And stay out" I say back to him, purposely stroking Christian's hair while I say it, only pissing him off more. Good, I loved to push his buttons and making him mad.

After some mumbled words, surely nothing nice about me, he was gone and I was left to tend to my true concern at the moment. I was sad to find out he was still out for the count. I guess I still had a few moments to enjoy him before he woke up and explanations were in order. He was going to be pissed, but I knew he would appreciate everything after I told him just how much I loved and cared about him. He would love me, he had to. I wouldn't bear anything other than his love.

***** ? *****

"I should have killed that fucker. I should have knocked him out harder. I won't make that mistake again that's for sure. "I mumbled to myself. I mean, after all I did for her, I was being treated like a fucking idiot, and to top it all, she was acting like a fucking bitch, making me jealous on purpose. What the hell she saw in that jackass I didn't know, but I wasn't going to let him take my woman away from me. Not without a fight. And right now I had the upper hand. That is, if she ever left that fucking room. Then I could make my final move and get this fucker out of our lives for good!


	15. Chapter 15

******Disclaimer: ****I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how i see fit! ;)**

***** Elena *****

"Don't worry my love. I'll take care of you" I say, stroking his hair and caressing his chest, truly amazed by him. I would die for this man. I would kill for him, without a second thought. And now he was here, in my arms, where he truly belongs. I couldn't be happier.

"H-Hmm. W-what shh thh?" he mumbles, completely taking me by surprise. I manage to keep stroking his hair in an attempt to calm him down and make him see he's safe with me. But after the initial shock wears off, my worst fears come true. Christian Grey is pissed, his eyes now turned completely black and lifeless and I am really scared for what he'll do next. And without a second more to waste, leaving me no time to react, he grabs my hand and holding it a little too strong, looks straight into my eyes and speaks the words that make me freeze on the spot.

"If you ever touch me again, I will kill you. You disgust me Elena. And know this, if you don't let me go then you must kill me. Because if you don't, I will devote my entire life to the destruction of yours and everything you hold dear in your black and disgusting heart." He says, nothing but hate and loading emanating from his being. He was not the man I had once loved. He was broken and I couldn't stand the sight of it. I had to put him down again, so I could think about my next move. But before I could pick up the drugged syringe I had close to me in case of emergency, he beats me to it. Somehow reading the very thought in my face, he stops me, puts his hand in my mouth and completely dominates me into submission, stabbing my neck with the toxic substance, leaving me to fall into complete darkness, wishing things had gone entirely different. At least I was in his arms…

***** Christian *****

"What the fuck? Where the hell am i?" I thought to myself, not believing the situation I had walked in. Me and Taylor. Fuck! Where was him? Where was i? And who the fuck had hit me? I could still feel my head sore from the cruel blunt. I was so pissed I couldn't even think straight. And then I had to wake up to that bitch touching me and making herself intimate with me.

Ugh, the simple thought of her being that close to me made my stomach turn on itself. I truly loaded her. Ana was right about her, all along. My Ana, how I missed her. But now I had to worry about myself for a second, get away from this crazy bitch. At least now she was asleep. That would buy me some time.

Fuck, I hear footsteps coming this way. What do I do? Hide dumbass!

"Elena, I'm gonna get something to eat. Want something?" he says, walking in, looking down at his phone. Thank god for this new generation distractions. It was my chance to act. I grab the closest item and hurl it as hard and fast as I can to this guy's head. He never sees it coming. He falls in front of me, completely knocked out. Good thing I had picked up a solid wooden lamp, that would make him sleepy for a while.

Now was time to do some recon of this place, and if things were in my favor, there would be nobody else standing between me and freedom. And Ana. I had to get out of here so I could get back to find her. I needed to leave, now. But before I could get out, I had to secure my kidnappers, so they wouldn't make my escape any harder than it had to be. Rolling the fallen body in front of me, I can seem to recognize him. I guess he was Elena's new boy toy. Poor guy, he was already screwed by just meeting this woman. She was poison in form of a blonde cougar.

After gagging the both of them with the sleeves of my already wrecked white shirt, I found some rope near the bed, clearly part of the plan to keep me in place in case of a fight. I guess I was starting to get lucky. Wrapping the rope around the both of them, I was happy to see them asleep and strapped together so tight there would take them a while to get out. I guess good things came out of my dark lifestyle. After looking for my phone, I can't find it anywhere so I take the one on the ground, the guy's phone and dial Taylor's number. Taking a deep breath and making sure I was silent as a church mouse, I make my way out of the room. I realize then I'm at a very familiar place. Sadly, too familiar for my liking.

I was being held at Elena's summer house, where she usually brought her sex toys to play with. I had been here a few times, not a single pleasant memory about it. But luckily I knew just how to get out of here. I stopped for a second, trying to hear any other sound that would make someone else's presence known. I get nothing, so I close the room's door and lock it with the key, conveniently placed in a table close to the door. I then proceed to call Taylor, his number permanently stamped in my memory, luckily. He picks up after the first ring.

"Taylor, it's me, Christian Grey" i say, a little annoyed i have to specify who i am.

"Sir! Where are you? Are you ok?" he asks, unable to hide his fear for my safety.

"I'm at Elena's Lincoln summer house. She's here with another man I don't recognize. I am ok now. I managed to secure the both of them. How fast can you get here?" I ask him, starting to get my calm and dominating self back.

"I'll be there in 10 minutes sir. Stay safe and keep that phone close to you." He says, ending the conversation as fast as it started. Good, if there was someone I could count on, it was Taylor. Now I had to wait. I guess it would be better to do it close to the room I had left the two trapped rats. That way I could hear any noise as soon as they woke up. But the minutes pass and not a beep comes from the room. They were going to sleep for a while I guess.

Like clockwise, Taylor arrives at the house, bringing with him two more security guys. I guess you could never be too careful in situations like this.

"Sir, where are they?" he asks, now full on military man. I have to say, he was good at his job.

"That room. I think they are unarmed but check anyway" I say back, letting him to his thing.

"Nice work Sir. They are out and I'm sure it would take them a while before they could get out of that entangled mess in there. Now, what do we do? Police or we handle this ourselves?" he asks me, taking me by surprise. The truth is I hadn't thought about it. All I wanted was to get out and find Ana, but he was right. We had to do something. But I couldn't figure anything ut right now, I was too pumped up and anxiety was overpowering me.

"No cops. Can you handle this yourself? I need to find Ana, now!" I tell Taylor, unable to hide my need to be with Ana again. I couldn't care less about what happened to that botch and her boy toy right now. I had better things to do. My revenge would have to wait.

"Don't worry sir. I'll put them somewhere safe until you can decide what to do. Now we should go. We have to find Miss Steele." He says, smirking a little. I guess he was good at his job and a mind reader as well. Good thing I had him in my corner.

"I agree. Let's go then" I tell him, leaving that disgusting place and those two cockroaches I would have a lot of pleasure crushing, behind me.

After giving his orders, Taylor and me walk into the car and I can't help myself, I have to know just how close are we to find Anastasia.

"Where's Ana? Do you know anything?" I ask him, anxiety taking the best of me.

"Yes sir. We found her." he tells me. But something about his tone tells me there's something wrong. And his eyes look sad and troubled. Fuck, what now!

"What is it Taylor? Where is she? Is she ok?" I ask him, no unable to control my breathing and my emotions. If anything had happened to her, I would never forgive myself. I need her to be ok, she had to be ok. She was my Ana, she was my life.

"Sir, I'm sorry to tell you this. But she was found unconscious. She was involved in a car accident. She has been in a come since then." He answers me.

"Coma? How long?" I ask him, almost inaudible.

"It has been two days sir. The doctors are optimistic though." He says, obviously trying to bring some form of life and hope back into my voice.

"I need to see her. Get me to her now Taylor!" I yell to him. I had to be with her. She would wake up. She had to. I wouldn't be able to survive if she didn't. Ana was going to wake up. She had to. I loved her. She couldn't die. I wouldn't make it without my Ana. My beautiful, strong and love of my life, Anastasia...


	16. Chapter 16

**I am so so sorry for the ridiculous delay. Not even going to bother with lame excuses. Truth be told, I forgot how to write for a while. But now my mojo is back! So to redeem myself, three chapters! And I promise to not keep you waiting forever again! Enjoy and review at will ;)**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"Open your eyes honey, we're here" my dad said, gently squeezing my hand to give me some reassurance everything had stopped spinning. I cautiously opened my eyes and found myself inside a Hospital. Hun? But it felt weird, there were no people there. Just me and my dad. That's odd.

"Dad, why are we in a Hospital? And where is everyone?" I asked him, unable to hide my curiosity. A Hospital without people was just plain weird.

"You need to see something Ana. Come on" he said, urging me into one of the rooms. It was a private room, with a big Hospital bed and a private bathroom. It even had a TV. Wow, I wouldn't mind staying in a room like this at all.

"Who's that?" I asked my dad, pointing at the patient sleeping in the bed. It was a girl, made obvious by the long hair and breast size. But she was facing the other way and I couldn't see her face. She looked peaceful though, apart from her completely fucked up state. I mean, the girl was a mess. Bruises, cuts, casts in both legs. Damn, poor girl.

"Take a closer look baby. But remember, stay calm. Everything we'll be ok" my dad whispered to me, releasing my hand so I could go the other way and check this poor girl's face. Why did I need to stay calm? Anyway, I slowly approached the bed, careful not to wake her. When I reached the other side of the bed and looked at her, my heart stopped. My legs froze in place, all the air in my lungs escaped me in one breath and I felt myself faint. It wasn't possible. I was hallucinating, had to be. Probably due to that earlier roller coaster ride. I was caught by my dad's strong arms before I hit the ground. He soothed me by stroking my hair and repeating that everything would be ok. But when I looked again at the girls face, nothing had changed. I was looking at myself. A broken, bruised version of myself.

"Dad, is that me? Am I lying on that bed? Is that why I can see you right now? Am I dying?" I whispered at him. My heart was racing, my breathing was becoming erratic and my whole body was shaking. This couldn't be happening, I was having a fucked up dream, had to be!

"Yes sweetie. That is you. That's why you're here with me now, talking to me and seeing me. You were in an accident Ana. You have been in a coma ever since." he said, stroking my hair and rubbing my hair. Somehow, through all this weird stuff, having him comforting me felt really good. But here I was, somehow trapped somewhere between the real world and some other world I wasn't suppose to see yet. Exactly why I disliked Sci Fi stuff, too much weirdness to comprehend.

"What? In a coma? But what do I do? How do I wake up dad?" I pleaded him for some answers. But the look he gave me let it pretty clear I was going to have to figure that out by myself.

"That is for you to find out sweetie. You are a strong girl, I know you'll figure it out. I'm so sorry I can't stay and help you. I really miss you baby. You have become a beautiful woman, just like your mother. I love so much Anastasia. Don't ever forget that. You will always be my little princess." He whispered into my hair, still rubbing my back. He was so gentle, so warm. No wonder my mother had fallen madly in love with him. That's why she kept dating and getting married. She wanted to feel this kind of love again. And I think she did, with my dad Ray. I know she loved him very much, and he loved her just as much. But sometimes love isn't enough. Sad but true. I was exhibit A.

"Can't you stay and help me dad? I don't have a clue what I'm doing! I don't even know where I am for god's sake!" I was starting to seriously panic! This didn't look good! How would I go back to my comatose body, if I was a freaking spectrum walking the halls of this Hospital like some damn horror movie character?

"I can't baby. I have to go. But you're not alone. Just focus on what you really want to go back to and it will happen. You're not suppose to die yet Ana, that's why you're here. This is your chance to show just how much you want to live again. It is completely up to you" He explains. So apparently I was in purgatory. Oh goodie. I was starting to feel like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, except I had no red shining shoes and no good witch to help me. Nop, I wasn't in Kansas anymore, I was in ghost town!

"I'm scared dad. Please stay" I begged him. I really couldn't do this alone. I was scared out of my mind. This whole thing was surreal!

"Ana, you will be fine. Focus honey. Trust yourself. You already said you want to go back, now all you need to do is find out why you want to do 't be scared, just focus ok? I love you sweetie, I'll never leave you." and just like that he was gone!

"No dad! Please come back! Please! Dad! Don't leave me here! Please!" I cried out, trying to make him come back, even though I knew he wouldn't. I was so scared tears started falling down my cheeks and I cried for as long as I could.

Here I was, alone in an alternate universe, staring at myself sleeping, completely trapped in a Hospital bed. It couldn't get any freakier than this! Right?


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"Hello Anastasia. Don't be afraid. Everything we'll be ok sweetie" whispered a soft voice. A voice I didn't recognize this time, but somehow made me feel safe and peaceful again. I looked up and there stood a beautiful woman, with dark brown hair, kind brown eyes and a smile that irradiated hope and peace. Or maybe I hoped that it did, I wasn't sure about anything anymore.

"Who are you? I-I'm sorry, I'm r-really scared" I murmured, not having it in me to speak any louder. She didn't seem to mind. Still smiling she walked towards me and gently stroked my wet cheek. Her touch felt so good, so warm and nurturing. I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths to calm myself. She continued to soothe me, by brushing my hair with her hand like a mother would. When I managed to calm down a bit, she took my hand and started talking.

"My name is Ella. Don't be scared sweetie. I'm here to help you. Trust me Ana" and she spoke with such softness and calmness I found myself calmer because of her.

"Before you can return to your rightful place, we have somewhere to go. Will you trust me?" she asked, smiling at me. And I did, I trusted her completely. No idea why, I just did.

"I do. I trust you Ella" I smile back at her. She exhales softly, relieved by my answer.

"Good. Don't let go of my hand Ana" she warns, and before I can reply, everything around us becomes a blurry sight until it goes completely white. Oh no, not again! I brace myself to fall into dizziness again, but this time the journey is much softer. Thank god, I was still recuperating from the last trip.

"It's ok. You can open your eyes now Ana" she says. And when I do, confusion strikes me. Again.

"Where are we?" I murmur, taking it all in. I had never been here, I knew that for sure. And it felt wrong, something about it made me feel unease. We were in a small apartment from what I could tell. Poorly furnished and the smell was just awful. It smelled of smoke and pee.

"This was my home. I died here. Come, you need to see something" she whispers, and I can see the faintest glimpse of sadness in her, otherwise radiating face. She takes my hand again and directs us into what seems like the living room. There's someone sitting in the couch barely moving. A woman with dark brown hair very similar to mine. As we go around the couch, I'm faced with a woman vaguely resembling the one next to me. But this Ella is just all wrong. Her skin is pale and bruised beyond belief, and her whole appearance scares the shit out of me. But the worse are her eyes, they are dead. This woman is in pain, probably because of the amount of drugs she is pumping through her veins, shown by the multiple syringes scattered at her feet. And is by looking at her feet that I notice a small boy, watching tv at this woman's feet. He too looks sick and pale. I immediately feel pained for him. He looks so helpless, so alone.

"Is that you? Is that your son?" I manage to ask her after a few moments contemplating this horrible sight.

"Yes. I was a drug addict, I overdosed on crack. That is my baby boy and his name is Christian" she whispers, warmly looking at her son. Wow, hold up. What? His name was what? Christian? And she was a crack addict that died? It couldn't be, or could it? I kept looking at her and back at the boy, trying to make some sense of all of this. Was she the reason my Christian had turn out so screwed up?

"Ana, I'm sorry to have to show you this. But you needed to understand what Christian was coming from. And for that, you had to see it for yourself. Believe me, I'm not proud of the life I lived. I failed my son. I failed myself. But I loved him very much, I still do." she whispers at me, her speech full of pain and regret.

"Yes, you did fail him. You were his mother and he loved. I know he did, even if he won't admit it to himself." I told her, suddenly feeling angry and disappointed. She should have protected and loved him. How could she not? He was such a beautiful boy, even in his fragile state. She should have fought for him.

"I know you're angry. I understand. But there's something else you need to see. Something that will make you understand certain things about Christian" she whispers. And as she does, a man walks in the apartment and I can feel the change in the air. He's clearly drunk, holding a bear in one hand and a cigarette in the other. He takes a look at the woman vegetating on the couch and laughs. The sound sends cold shivers down my spine. This man is dangerous, I can feel it. His gaze now set on the poor boy, watching TV, absent-minded from the rest of the world.

The man makes a bee line to the boy, passes the woman completely unnoticed and pulls the boy up by one arm. The boy starts protesting, begging him to let go and just let him be alone. He cruelly laughs at the request and slaps the boy so hard it almost knocks him out. He then drags the boy to one of the rooms and releases him on the floor. The boy is now sobbing, and his eyes are now full of terror and fear for what is going to happen next. Without any regret, the man lows himself to the boys level and I know something horrible is going to happen. My first instinct is to save the boy, but Ella takes hold of me and tells me to wait.

I cannot believe her reaction and try to free myself from her, struggling to get to the boy and save him from this monster. She tells me that this already happened so there's nothing I can do but watch, in complete horror, as the boy gets completely dominated by the man and gets his little malnourished chest burned by the man's cigarette. He burns him a couple of times and after he's satisfied, he let's go of the boy and goes back to seat in the couch, sipping hir beer and watching TV. Like everything was normal and he hadn't just violently abused the poor little boy of the woman next to him.

I was breathless. In front of me laid the ghost of the boy my loving Christian had been once. He was sobbing uncontrollably, curled up in a corner, hiding away from the world. His chest was badly wounded, but I knew his soul had gotten the harsher beaten. He was a broken child, because of a monster her mother had let into their lives. Now I knew why Christian cringed every time someone tried to touch him. He had been violently defiled by the most disgusting excuse of a man I had ever seen in my life.

I was speechless. All I wanted to do was reach out and just hold the little boy in my arms, give him some small form of comfort. Letting him know life wouldn't always look so dark and painful. Now I understood why he was so screwed up. Now I knew where his fifty shades had come from. They started here, in this house, with this monster and his ungodly actions. My poor Christian, the hell he came from. No wonder he couldn't find peace now, somehow he was still haunted by these ghosts.

"Now you know why my son needs you Ana. He needs you to bring him back to the light. Only you can bring him out of the darkness he keeps pushing himself into. You are the one Ana" she whispered. This time squeezing my shoulder. I knew it was her fault this had happened for so long. But seeing her like this, so peaceful and beautiful, made me realize she was also a victim. Life had screwed her up real good too. But here she was, trying to save her son by showing me just how much he suffered because of her. And for that, I thanked her. Now I could save my fifty shades. Now I knew how.

"I know. I need him too. I love your son Ella. I won't let him be alone anymore. I promise" And with that promise, the sad chapter of Christian's life disappears in front of us and we were back to the Hospital room, where my flesh and blood self remains motionless. This would never stop being freaky.

"Ana, thank you for trusting me and letting me show you all of that. Save my son, protect him like I should have. Goodbye my dear Ana" and with that she vanishes, just like my dad before her. And I'm left alone again. This was starting to piss me off. All I wanted was to get back to my real body and just find Christian. I would never get that image out of my head, the pleading in his eyes for the man to stop, the hurt in his eyes when the assault was done, the vulnerability and helplessness he must have felt lying in that floor alone. My poor fifty shades, I loved him so much more now. I understood him now. I needed to get to him and let him know I wasn't going to give up on him. I Would never give up on us. But how could I get back? What did I have to do? This was so frustrating! My body was right there, inches away and I couldn't make myself wake up!

Damn it! Please god, please! Just let me wake up! I need to get back! Please! My fifty shades needs me! Please!


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"I'm sorry Mr. Grey. But she hasn't shown any signs of improving. We'll just have to keep watching her and hoping for the best"

That was all the stupid doctor had to say. God, how I hated the damn clichés. Of course she was going to wake up, Ana was one of a kind. Someone like that couldn't just disappear. She was just taking a little too much time to get back that's all. Or maybe the doctors over here had no idea what they were doing. Of course, how could I waste so much time and not bring my mom into this? If someone could make Ana wake up, it would be my mother.

"Hi mom. I need you help." I whispered into my phone. After explaining everything to my mother, she immediately agreed do meet me at the Hospital Ana was in and make sure she was getting the best treatment she could possibly get. I loved my mother, she was the best woman I had ever met. Until I met Ana, then my whole world shifted and begin to revolve around her. She was so beautiful, even now, laying in this damn Hospital bed, with all of the bruises and cuts and medical casts, she was still glowing and looking as stunning as ever. I couldn't love her any more even if I tried.

I sat down close to her, stroking her hair and touching her hand. She was so warm and peaceful, like an angel. My angel. All I wanted was for her to wake up so I could tell her just how much I loved her and needed her in my life. No BDSM bullshit, contracts, safewords, playrooms or punishments. I just wanted her, I needed her touch, her scent, her body, her soul and her love. Nothing more.

"Omg! Ana" gasped a very shocked and panicked Katherine Kavanagh. Shit. I guess privacy was out of the picture now. But that was ok, even I knew when to stand down. And besides, Kate was as closest to a sister as Ana had. I owed her to be nice to her friend. And I knew exactly what she was feeling right now. The first time I saw Ana like this, my whole body froze on the spot and all I could manage to do was control the tears from running down my face. She looked so weak, broken and defenseless like this. The protector in me immediately kicking in, I rushed to her side and stayed there until now. It had been 24 hours and still nothing. I was starting to lose my mind to be honest.

"Kate, take a seat. She is stable now, there's no danger anymore. We just have to wait for her to wake up" I manage to say to her, as calm and politely as I could. She seamed content with my explanations and took a seat on the other side of the bed. Good, because there was no way I was living my spot for her.

"So, she hasn't opened her eyes or anything like that?" she whispered, never leaving Ana's face and holding her hand fiercely.

"No. Nothing yet" I murmured back, also looking into her face, trying to catch any small sign she was regaining consciousness. Still nothing. This was incredibly frustrating! She was right in front of me, her body was here, but everything else that made her who she was, was gone. And that burned me inside. I was aching for her, yearning for her to wake up and look at me with those beautiful blue eyes that bewitched me so long ago.

I was so immersed in my internal distress I didn't even realize my brother was in the room, gently soothing Kate. I gave him an apologetical nod and he nodded back. It was a strange thing to se my brother so grim. He was always so happy and enthusiastic about life that seeing him like this made the situation look even more exasperating. And to top that, I was running on fumes. I hadn't been able to sleep from the minute I got here. I wanted to be the first person Ana saw when she woke up. But after 24 hours of zero wakening up, I was starting to feel drained and completely helpless. I didn't want to leave, because if she did woke up and I wasn't here, I would never forgive myself. She had ben away from me for far too long. I wasn't letting her out of my sight ever again, that's for sure!

"You look tired bro. Maybe you should get some sleep. Don't want Ana to wake up and find you looking like a sleep deprived racoon" Elliot mused. I couldn't help but chuckle at his joke. Good old Lelliot, leave it to him to put a smile on your face.

"I'm not leaving her. I want to be here when she wakes up. I'll just sleep in here" I murmured, resting my head on my hand, on top oh Ana's hand. I was so tired I didn't even hear what he said back. I started to tune out everything else and focused entirely on Ana's face and her breathing. She was calm and her breathing was even. I found myself mimicking her, so before I knew it, I was deep asleep, with her soft hand next to me.

I was completely petrified when I saw him walk into the room my body was resting in. He looked as gorgeous as I remembered, with his perfectly sculpted face and those intoxicating grey eyes that haunted my most scorching dreams. Everything about him was sheer perfection. He was my piece of heaven on earth, as volatile as the sea itself. I could stare at him forever and not get bored for a second. He was a beautiful man, and I hoped he could still be all mine one day. My heart dropped to my knees when I saw the look on his face. He was shocked, and probably horrified to see me so destructed and broken. I wanted so badly to just wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him non stop. But I couldn't. At least not yet.

As soon as the shock wore off, he immediately rushed to my side and sat down next to me, holding my hand and whispering something I couldn't make sense of. God, why was this so damn hard! I wanted to hear him, touch him and smell him. I wanted to go back! He needed me, I could tell. He was so sad and hurt, I could see him fighting off tears because of me. Because of my condition. I was hurting him by not going back. I had to go back! Now!

Nop, still not happening! Damn it! This was going nowhere!

I had to calm down and think. What could I do? How would I go back?

Seeing him like this, looking at me like that, warmed me up so much I found myself crying again. Here he was, my dominating fifty shades of fucked up, holding my hand, kissing it and whispering what I hoped to be sweet things into my ears.

He was so much more than what he gave himself credit for, I hated not being able to tell him how I loved him and how proud of him I was. I wanted him so much, that for a second I forgot I was a freaking ghost and walked to his side and stroke his cheek with the back of my hand. And his reaction made me freak out a little. He shivered when I touched him. Had he felt me? Could he feel me? I knew he couldn't see me but maybe he could feel me, my essence or whatever.

I was intrigued, so I tried again. This time I stroke the back of his head, and when he shivered again I knew he was feeling me. Our connection was still alive, even with us in different realms. I wanted more, so I tried something else. I kissed him. And this time, he did more than shivering. He licked his lips and looked at my sleeping self dumbfounded. He murmured something into my ears, probably asking if it was me or something like that. So i did it again. He was completely insane now, rubbing his lips and licking them compulsively. He looked so cute, this distressed and confused.

I didn't have it in me to keep messing with him, no matter how much I wanted his lips on mine so I stopped. Choosing to just stay close to him, I stayed there for what felt like hours, watching him calm himself down again and resume his worshiping of my sleeping face. I was so in love with this man. I had to go back somehow.


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"What the hell are you doing here? Get the fuck out!" I immediately positioned myself between Ana and the guy she considered a trusted friend once. He had to be crazy to think I would let him get close to her.

"Grey! Back off!" Kate snaps. She had a temper of her own. If I wasn't so pissed myself I would back off.

"Stay out of this Kate!" I wasn't letting her get in the middle of this, she had no idea what he had done before.

"Bro calm down" Elliot tried to calm me down. No luck.

"She's my friend Grey, I'm not leaving!" Said the man himself. He had some balls I'll give him that! And the way he was defying me, brought up the dominating side of me.

"Stay away from her! The last time she talked to you she wanted nothing to do with you! And I'll make damn sure she gets what she wants!" There, maybe now he'll get it and just fuck off.

"What are you talking about Grey? José has been friends with Ana for years!" Kate defended him, like I needed to be reminded of this so called long term friendship. If it was up to me, José would have been out of Ana's life a long time ago. He loved her, wanted her. She was so innocent and pure she kep him close, not realizing the severity of doing so. He was waiting for a chance to steal her from me, and nearly succeeded. Once. But that was it. Wouldn't make a fool out of me anymore. I was onto his little game.

"Kate don't. I got this. Look Grey, I messed up and I'm really sorry. But I did it for her and maybe one day she'll see that. But I still care about her. When she wakes up I'll let her decide what she wants to do. Until then I'm staying." This guy was working my last nerve! Standing there actually sounding apologetical and filled with regret and love for his friend. Bullshit! He wanted her for himself. Wanted to catch her on her weakest form and take advantage. No way that would happen! He was leaving now!

"The hell you are!" I barked at him, making him take one small step back. Ha, pussy. Before I could throw this fucker out of the room with my bare hands, my brother was next to me, holding me in place and trying to calm me down. Again, no luck.

"Christian stop! Ana deserves to have all her friends and loved ones around her now. So back off and just calm down. You're not in charge here. When she wakes up she'll decide what to do about all of this" Kate snapped at me, now taking José's side and confronting me. She was a brave little thing I'll give her that. The only reason I didn't snap back at her was because my brother liked her. And I knew she loved Ana and cared for her. But the thought of having this jackass here, this close to my Ana made my blood boil. He better not touch her, I would knock him out instantly. And just like that, I backed off. I would let him make the wrong move first, then kick him out. Sounded like a good plan as any.

"Fine. Whatever. Just stay away from me." I hissed at him, never looking away from his face. He was holding his own, but his body was slightly shaking. He felt intimidated. Good to know.

"Thanks Kate...So...How is she?" He asked, turning away and looking at Kate now. Like a predator, I kept my gaze on him, awaiting for the first wrong decision to attack. He kept his distance from the bed, only looking at Ana and asking questions about her.

"Still sleeping." Kate whispered, retaking her place next to the bed, in front of me. She took back Ana's hand and started looking at her, like she was doing before the unwelcome intrusion. When José took a seat close to the door and far away from the bed, I relaxed a bit and sat back down. Elliot took that as a sign I was calm at last and got back to his seat next to Kate's, rubbing her shoulder and kissing her forehead. He was really in love with her I coul d tell. Good for him. If I wasn't this fucked up excuse of a man, I too could have that kind of love with Ana. She was perfect for me, so sweet and nurturing. She could make me whole again. Only her.

When I touched Ana's beautiful face, her skin was so warm and soft my insides melted. I held her hand close to my lips and gently brushed her knuckles like I normally did to soothe her when she was nervous or anxious about something. Maybe if I kept doing what she liked, she would come back to me and brighten my entire life with her beautiful smile and those gorgeous blue eyes I loved so much. Worth the try.

"I'm gonna get something to eat. Anyone wanna join?" Elliot chipped away. Always hungry my brother, no matter where he was or what was going on. Food was like a freaking religion to him.

"I'm kinda hungry. I'll join you" I hear José mumble and get up to leave with Elliot. Good, maybe now he would just stay out.

"Alright. Hey bro, want me to get you something?" Elliot asked me. I wasn't really hungry, couldn't think about food right now so I shook my head and just kept looking at Ana and kissing her hand.

"Ok, see you guys in a bit" And just like that, I was left with Ana and Kate in the room. I didn't mind it though. She was in her own place right now. Probably begging Ana to wake up as much as I was.

"Why isn't she waking up? Has she given up?" Kate whispered, more to herself than to me. But I was right there with her. Why wasn't Ana waking up? The doctors explained there was no major damage to the brain and that she was physically alright. Then why was she in a coma?

"I really hope not. I can't live without her" I whispered into Ana's hand, taking comfort in her warmness. I truly cherished her, and hoped to have a second chance to prove it to her.

"She loves you" Kate stated. Her tone showed me she was reticent about the fact. I didn't blame her. I wasn't good for Ana, I knew that. But she was perfect for me, and I would do anything in my power to deserve her.

"I know. I love her too. More than I ever thought possible" I murmur, my chest aching. I was desperate for a sign, any sign that my Ana was still here with me. So far my hopes had been in vain. But I had to keep up wishing, hoping for the best. She was my salvation.

"She deserves to be happy. Don't hurt her Christian" The warning in her voice was clear. Kate was protecting her best friend and for once I slightly cringed to imagine a vengeful Katherine Kavanagh coming after me. Not that I intended to hurt Ana again, but still, the treat was enough for me.

"When Ana wakes up I intend to put a genuine smile on her face every day for the rest of our life." There, that seamed to please her. She nodded at me and left the room for a bit, saying she had to go eat something. I was glad to have Ana all to myself. There was so much I wanted to say to her, hoping that somehow she would listen, wherever she might be now and urge to come back.

"Ana please, I need you baby. I love you so much it hurts knowing you might never know just how much I cherish you. Come back baby, I need you in my live. I want to give you the world, all you have to do is wake up. That's it. Just wake up, for me baby, for us" I begged into her lips, my forehead rested against hers. She was breathing evenly and so far there was no change. She was still sleeping, gone somewhere I couldn't reach her. And that's when I felt it again, a weird feeling I had felt earlier today,like something was brushing my cheek. Like a breath, soft and warm. And for a second I imagined if it was possible Ana was communicating with me. If that was the case, she was still here, trapped somewhere. All I could do was wait. And feeling completely revoked of control over it was making me insane!

* * *

"Christian! I love you so much!" Ahh, this was so frustrating! Every time I touched him I knew he felt it, but didn't know it was me! I had to go back! It had been too long since I've tasted his lips on mine, since I felt his breath on my neck and felt the surge of electricity every time he touched me. I needed him, I yearned for him. He was mine, and I was his. It was time to go back!

And suddenly a thought came to me, like a freaking vision. I rushed to my sleeping self side and gently placing my hands on top of my hands (weird I know!) I climbed into the bed. I was now hovering over myself (again, Freaky!) and holding my sleeping face with my hands, rested my forehead in my sleeping forehead and let out all of my deepest prayers and wishes. After my mind cleared up completely, I leaned in and placing my lips on my sleeping lips, concentrated all of my thoughts into one single prayer: "Wake up Anastasia! Your life has just begun! No more running, no more waiting! Your time is now! Wake up and live! Now!"

* * *

"Ana!" she was awake, finally! She was still dazed, probably because of being in a coma for so long. But she was awake, thank god!

"Hmm" she mumbled, obviously still dizzy from the comatose state she was in.

"Hi baby, welcome back. Don't worry baby. You're ok now. Oh Ana, I've missed you so much" I went in to kiss her but she pulled away from me, immediately covering herself with the sheet for safety. She started looking around frantically, like she was afraid, of me? But why?

"Ana, it's ok. You're safe baby, don't worry" I tried to soothe her by stroking her cheek but she pushed my hand away. She was scared, of me. I felt my heart stop.

"P-Please stop...I-I don't know you...I d-don't know what's going on.."She whispered almost inaudible, tears running down her cheeks. I refused to accept what she said. I couldn't do it.

"Ana, baby it's ok. You've been asleep for a while. Your mind is just a little confused but it will come back. You're safe now. Trust me baby" I whispered at her, reaching for her hand. But she slapped it away and started screaming for help. What was going on? Did she really not remember me? I couldn't bear it, not my Ana. I needed her and prayed for her to come back. And now she was here, alive and awake. But apparently had no memory of me.

"Ana?! Omg! You're awake! Oh honey, I was so scared!" Kate came running into the room, immediately taking Ana into her arms. And Ana let her, sobbing into her neck. José and Elliot walked in behind Kate, and when José started walking towards Ana, she smiled feebly at him and welcomed his arms. She remembered him. She remembered Kate. But she had no idea who I was. And that completely crushed me. She had returned, but not for me.

Looking at her I expected to see love in her eyes, but now all I saw was fear and confusion. The love of my life had no idea who I was. The Universe was clearly fucking with me, and I felt myself collapse.


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"How is she?" My voice breaking, filled with pain and sorrow. Ana still had no memory of who I was or what we had together. It had been a long week. I was starting to lose hope. Maybe this was Ana's way of showing me that we belonged apart.

"She's sleeping now. I'm sorry Christian" Kate whispered, trying to keep Ana peaceful a while longer. I kept gazing at my beautiful Anastasia, so close but yet so far from my reach.

"She remembers nothing from 2 years ago. I tried to get her to think about it, but she started having headaches. I think it's still too soon. But she'll come around, just give her some time Christian" Kate was actually trying to appease my mind. The world was really upside down for Kate Kavanagh to start acting as a friend of mine.

"Maybe she needs me to just leave her alone. Pressuring her hasn't done her any good so far. Every time I get close to her she panics. And I can't bear to see her like that. Looking at me like that, afraid of me. I just can't" I whispered, more to myself than anything. I had pondered on what to do, ever since Ana woke up to fear me. My heart cried for the simple thought of leaving her and not looking back. But my mind pressured me to just do the rational thing and leave.

Deep down in the pitch black pit of my own personal darkness, I knew this should be taken as a god sent sign that I wasn't meant to taint Ana's innocence any further. And I knew I would eventually, it was only a matter of time before she was truly damned for ever meeting me. But pulling away from her, the only woman I truly allowed inside my heart, was proving to be a task from hell. And I was starting to feel to limp of a man to do the right thing and just free her from the impending doom.

"Christian. I know we were never truly friendly towards one another. We merely tolerated each other because of Ana. And it is because of her that I beg you to fight. For her and for you. She deserves her true love to keep fighting for her, even if she can't remember who that person is right now" Kate was pleading me to stay? And she actually believed me to be Ana's true love? I was dumbfounded.

"A big part of me wants to stay and fight for her. But I can't shake this feeling that Ana waking up and not remembering me is faith's way of sending me on my way. She's too good for me Kate. I always knew that, but pushed those feelings away because she loved and wanted me in her life. But now she doesn't even know who I am, let alone love me. She deserves to be happy. Me sticking around will only remind her of what she used to know and feel and she'll feel nothing but sadness and regret. I don't want her to feel nothing more than true happiness. Even if that means letting her live her life without me in it" Fuck, that felt like a knife to the heart, a twisted and infected blade whose only purpose was to destroy and kill everything in its way.

"Don't you dare give up on her. She would never give up on you, no matter what stood in her way. She would fight for you. Always" Kate was pissed. But why? You'd think she'd be happy to finally have me gone.

"Why are you mad? Ana is better off without me, you know that. And I'm pretty sure you warned her to stay away from me once or twice before. It's the right thing to do" I can feel Kate's internal struggle. She dislikes me but loves Ana.

"Don't be a coward! Stay and fight for her! She deserves you to fight for her! And what if she wakes up tomorrow, remembers every thing and you're nowhere to be found? She will be heartbroken and it will be your fault. Can you live with that? Can you live knowing that you broke her?" Kate is now full blown fighter mode. Fighting for her friends happiness. It's endearing, if it wasn't so misguided. Ana deserves to be happy, of course she does. But not with me, never with me. I'm to damaged, too fucked up for that to happen.

"I'm not a coward! If I knew she would regain her memory eventually I would never leave. But you heard what the doctors said, even my mother said so. Her memory is damaged. There's no telling if she will ever regain those 2 years back. So what if in the mean time, she finds someone else? Someone more deserving of her love? What then? Must I wait until she moves on? Isn't it better if I just disappear? It's not like she'll miss me. She won't even notice I'm gone. I'll be nothing more than a ghost of what her life used to be."

"I thought you were stronger than this. The way Ana spoke of you, one would believe you were a god or something. Now I see you're just like any other man out there. Too weak to fight for anything worth fighting for. She loves you. But you can't appreciate that. Just do her a final kindness and vanish. She deserves better than a spineless coward looking for an easy way out." The look of disgust and disappointment on Kate's face was heartbreaking. Every word out of her mouth was like a tiny needle being shoved deeper and deeper into my racing heart. Her tone was so cold and vicious.

She truly was looking out for Ana, and just for a moment, I felt better knowing that Ana could rely on her for comfort. Not that she would need comfort. After all, she couldn't mourn something she had forgotten. But I could, and I would remember every thing. Every minute of every day spent close to her. Her touch, her scent, her warmth. I would miss every inch of her perfect body. But above all else, I would mourn the love she had so willingly given me. A love that had me, for a moment, thinking I could actually have it all. Ana had stumbled into my life, her light burning too bright, too fast for someone like me to bear. Now she was gone, taking with her my happy ending. All that was left was the cold embrace of reality. My reality. And it had never look so dark and hopeless. . .


	21. Chapter 21

**Because I'm in such an inspired mood, 3 chapters! Hope you enjoy and let me know what you think! Laters ;)**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"Kate, where's Christian?"

"I'm sorry babe. He left. He gave up! Coward! I'm so mad at him right now"

"He what? Left? That sounds nothing like him! The guy loves her! No, I bet he's just trying to get his shit together. He'll be back you'll see"

"I'm not sure babe. I saw the look on his eyes. He's done. I'm so mad Elliot! Ana deserved better. She really loved him. Now I hope she never regains her memory because if she does, she'll end up heartbroken. This is so messed up!"

"I know my brother baby, he'll never forgive himself if he does give up on Ana. He really loves her. Give him time ok?"

"Yeah, ok. Whatever babe. I just want her to be happy."

"I know baby, so do I. She's pretty great."

"You're lucky I'm not the jealous type mister."

"Oh baby, you know I only have eyes for you! From the first time I saw you, you've been the only woman for me."

"Good save."

"Now show me some love! Come here baby"

"Elliot! Ana's right next to us!"

"She's sleeping, she won't even notice we're here, let alone what we're doing. Come on beautiful, I miss you"

"Oh babe, I miss you too. Just a kiss ok?"

Omg...I cannot believe Kate and her new boyfriend are actually making out while I'm in the room, unconscious. Well, I'm not unconscious anymore but there's no way I'm waking up now. Eww!

This Elliot guy seems pretty great though, and she looks really happy. He's a bit too horny for my taste but hey, he's dating Kate so it's understandable. With a girlfriend like Kate, no guy can resist. I wish I was as irresistible as she is.

"Really Elliot? Ana is right next to you guys!"

Oh no, it's him again. That incredibly hot guy that claims to know who I am. Hell he even said we were in love. Apparently I've had some brain damage and lost some of my memories, but somehow, the thought of this man loving me and wanting me sounds too weird. There's no way he would ever notice me. He must be crazy or something.

"Sorry bro. Can't help it. You know the feeling" Oh, and his brother is dating my best friend. That's just peachy.

"Yeah I do. But maybe you should try to control those impulses instead of doing something like this. She's right next to you, sleeping. Show some respect."

"You came back. I thought you were done. Why are you back?" That was Kate. She sounded surprised. What the hell is going on?

"I was clearly sleep deprived. I'm not going anywhere. We belong together, and I'll wait for her. No matter how long it takes" Oh boy, here we go again.

"See? Told ya babe! He wouldn't let go of Ana. He loves her too much! He wants to marry her and have lots of babies!" Elliot is a real time joker apparently!

"Shut up Lelliot! Why don't you go home and take care of your own girlfriend? Maybe then you won't feel the need to suck faces in a Hospital room!" Uhh, he's good! Ha, love to see Kate's face, clearly she's blushing!

"Touché baby brother. Babe, what do you say? He's here now so she won't be alone. Besides, she won't wake up for a while now right? Come on, you could use some rest too" No no please, don't go. Don't leave me alone with Mr sexy over here!

"Hmm, I guess you're right. Ok, we can go home for a while. But if she wakes up you call me immediately Grey! I want to be here when she wakes up again ok?" Damn Kate, that was too easy! She must be in need of some alone time with Elliot. Eww, too much information!

"Don't worry. You'll be the first I call. Bye Elliot. Bye Kate"

Oh no no no! Fuck! I hear them leaving and the door being closed. We're alone!

Ohhhh, this isn't good. I can feel my heart racing. Shit, he can see it on the monitors!

Calm down Ana jeez. The man is gorgeous yeah, but he won't touch you. If he does you can always scream!

Yeah, ok, that's better. Calm down, he's not even close to you. I think...I can smell him though. Oh god, he smells soooo good!

"You can open your eyes now. I know you're awake Ana" Omg, I can feel his breath on my face. He must be really close! And how the hell does he know I'm not sleeping? That's too freaky. What do I do? Maybe I should just stay with my eyes closed. Yeah, that will teach him not to assume things. Omg he smells so good! Focus Ana!

"Fine. You can keep pretending babe, if that's what you want. I just thought we could use this time alone to talk. Maybe if we actually had a full conversation, you could remember something about us. Oh, I also brought you some Red vines and Hershey chocolate bars. I thought you would like something sweet after all the Hospital food you've been eating. But since you're asleep I guess I'll just have some myself"

"Hey, you brought those for me! No stealing!" Fuck! betrayed by my gluttony. Oh he's good, he knows just how to tease me. Maybe he does know me after all. Oh fuck, he's staring at me. And he's smiling! Oh the devil! And those eyes, damn! He's really hot! I can feel my cheeks burning. I'm blushing. Great!

"Well, hello to you too! Oh you want these? I thought you wanted nothing to do with me" Damn, he's playing games! I hate it when men play games. I feel like a little girl, reaching for the stupid candy. You know what? I have my pride. Let him keep the damn chocolate.

"I guess I was right. If you're going to be a jerk about it then keep the damn candy. Eat them all for all I care." There, suck on that beautiful man!

"Ana, I was kidding. I'm sorry babe. Here, all yours" He hands me the package, and it's filled with good stuff. There's even some hard candy and others. Yummi. He's still staring at me, but it's not freaking me out this time. There's a kindness in his eyes that just make me melt away.

He is so gorgeous I can see women just throwing themselves at his feet for a fraction of the attention he's giving me right now. Lucky me. I just wished his presence wasn't such a turn on for me. I am literally yearning for him, and I don't even know who he is. Damn it!

"You know, it's not really fair when you look at me like that. If I did the same you would call me a pervert." He's smirking at me! Fuck, he knows! Ah hell! Of course he knows, he's hot and he knows it. Cocky bastard! And I guess it doesn't help that I'm blushing every 5 seconds in his presence!

"I have no idea what you're talking about" Ha, take that. I concentrate on eating some of the treats he brought me. Damn, these are good!

"Don't lie to me Ana. I know you better than you think."

"So you say. I still have no memory of you. But I'll give you this, I was surprised you knew I wasn't sleeping. And you nailed my favourite candies. There, happy?"

"I know you Anastasia. I know your body, your needs and desires. You can't lie to me, just as I can't lie to you. Simple"

"See? Why do you do that? Are you trying to make me feel completely uncomfortable?"

"Why? What did I say that was so bad?"

"'I know your body, needs and desires'...that's just weird!" I actually tried to sound like him. He looks amused by it.

"Do I sound like that?"

"Yeah you do. You have a very powerful voice. Hell, everything about you screams power. It's very awkward for me. You make me feel awkward"

"Really? I have no idea why you would feel awkward around me. Not after everything we've been through."

"Brain damage remember? I have no recollection of you or our moments together. Therefore, you are a complete stranger to me. And it doesn't help when you're all beautiful and sex on legs and I'm just me. It's weird Mr. Grey, just plain weird"

"Christian please, not Mr. Grey. Not right now. This is weird for me too Ana." He takes a deep breath and goes on. I can't take my eyes of his beautiful face.

"I love you and want you like crazy Anastasia. But you don't know who I am, so all I can do is try to make you fall in love with me all over again. But you keep fighting me and making it very hard for me to even get close to you. I know this is hard for you, but you're not the only one that lost something in that car crash. Our relationship was taken from us the same moment your memory was damaged. I have no idea when or if you are ever getting those pieces back, so I'm kinda lost here. I don't know what to do or how to act around you. All I know is I love you and I can't give up. So please, tell me what can I do. I'll do anything Ana, just give me a chance"

Wow...I don't know what to say to that. He's looking in my eyes with such yearning and lust I can control my next move. My body jumps forward and I close the space between us and kiss him hard on the lips.

My god, his lips are so soft and warm. And taste like home. Oh man, what have I done! He groans softly and pulls away. Omg! That was so hot! And it was only a kiss! A damn good one. He's breathing hard now, avoiding my gaze and his eyes are closed. He looks distraut. Oh no. He hated it. Well of course he did! Why wouldn't he? It's me he kissed, not some super hot top model.

I feel my insides burning and suddenly I want to cry. I just kissed a complete stranger and he is obviously repulsed. Well, so much for his so called deep love! I turn away from him and try my hardest not to start crying. I'm so embarrassed right now. I just want the damn floor to swallow me whole. What a fool I am!


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"Ana, what's wrong?" He tries to make me look at him, but I'm too ashamed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that. Please, let's just forget that happened!" Now I'm pretty sure I must be completely red. Such a dumb move on my behalf!

"What? Why?" He sounds confused and a little pissed, I think. Welcome to the club!

"I saw the look on your face! I'm no fool, I know you were grossed out by the kiss. So just let it go. It was a stupid mistake. Won't happen again"

"What? Are you kidding me? Trust me Ana, disgust was not what I felt. I pulled away because I knew I wouldn't be able to control myself much longer"

"Whatever. I know what I saw" He must be joking if he thinks I'm buying any of this. He pulled away, he was grossed out.

"Anastasia, all I want is to kiss you, touch you and make you feel loved again. But I know I have to take it slow, otherwise you'll just get scared and I'll lose you for good. I can't risk that. I wouldn't survive. So please, anytime you want to kiss me, or touch me or anything else do it. Don't think twice. I'm yours Ana, I will always be yours. You're free to take full advantage of that fact. I'll just have to find a way to control myself and not scare you away. Believe me, I want you Ana, so much it hurts."

"Oh...I thought you didn't like it. I mean, I know I'm not the hottest piece of ass in town but no one has ever reacted like that to a kiss from me. I was embarrassed"

"Ok, three things. First: You are the only woman that has ever attracted me like this, so stop diminishing yourself. I don't like it when you degrade yourself Ana, you are beautiful and every man would be so lucky to have you. Second: I already explained why I pulled away, there's no need for you to reminisce about other men kissing you. I don't really want to think about other men looking at you let alone touching you or kissing you. Third but not least: I will kiss you right now, for as long as it takes, if that's what it takes for you to understand how I feel about you. I can't promise I'll be able to stop there but that's a risk I'm willing to take to make you see just how much I want you. I meant it when I said I loved you Ana. I'll prove it to you anyway I can."

Ok, he's not kidding. Wow. Is it possible that this god with grey eyes is really in love with me? And do I want him to prove it?

Omg...I just realised something. If we were indeed together, how far did we go? Am I no longer a virgin? Omg! Has he seen me naked? Oh no, not that, he's so hot and I'm so not. What the hell is going on! I'm so confused! Well, if he had seen me naked he wouldn't want me anymore right? I mean, come on! He's shaped like a freaking god and I'm just me. Yeah, that must be why he's still around, he wants in my pants. This must be a game of some kind. Yeah, that makes sense!

"Ana, I can see the confusion in your face. Just talk to me. Whatever it is, we can work it out. Let me in Anastasia please"

"I-I'm confused. I don't understand why someone like you would fall for someone like me. I'm not fishing for compliments or anything, I just don't really get what you would see in me. I'm so ordinary. And you're so extraordinary. I don't know. I'm just a mess I guess"

"Ana stop. Please just stop. You are beautiful. I can barely think when you're around. I know you're feeling confused right now but I can assure you, if I had my way, you wouldn't feel like this. It's killing me not being able to touch you. Please, just stop selling yourself short. You're beautiful and I've been intoxicated by you from the first time you walked into my life."

"Look, I'm not the most self confident woman on earth, I know that. I'm not saying I'm hideous, but I'm not gorgeous either. I'm normal. And you are the most perfect man I have ever seen in my life, let alone kiss. I'm a little taken aback by this whole thing." God, I can't believe I just said that out loud.

"Ana, there's only so much I can take. If you don't stop talking crap about the woman I love, I'm going to prove to you just how wrong you are." Damn, there's such fire in his eyes I actually freeze on the spot.

"Anastasia, you're biting your lip. Are you doing in it on purpose?" He whispers so close to my mouth I have to take a deep breath to calm myself down. This man is just too much. I can't control myself when I'm around him. That's why it's so scary. My body wants him, but my mind is just too messed up to do anything about it.

"No. I didn't know I was doing it. I'm sorry" My voice doesn't even sound like my own. I'm so turned on right now. God help me!

"Ana, I'm going to kiss you" He whispers back to me. He looks at me first, probably searching for any sign that I want him to stop. I make no move. I want this. Lord help me I want him! He smirks and then his lips are on mine. The feeling it's indescribable. My hands are on his hair, tugging it and making him groan. Somehow I had a feeling he would like that. It's so hot having this man kissing me, his tongue caressing mine, exploring and arousing me with every lick and gentle bite on my lower lip. It's like he needs this to breathe. He needs me. And I need him. There's no rational reason why, I want him. All of him.

He's unbelievably good at this, I can feel my entire body melting away, giving in to the moment. His hands start caressing my arms, travelling to my back and I instinctively arch my back to close the distance between us. I want him so much, it's insane! My hands are now wrapped around his neck and I can feel his heart beating like crazy. He wants me too. Oh god, I'm losing my mind.

There's so much passion and lust in this kiss I'm the one pulling away at the end. I need to catch my breath and pull myself together. What the hell is going on! I just kissed this man, twice, and I don't even know his middle name. The fuck is wrong with me! All I can't think about is his flawless chiseled body controlling mine. I want to know what is hiding beneath the perfectly tailored grey suit. I want to know him. But I'm scared. And completely turned on.

Hell, this is just too much! He's taking control of my body and my mind. I have to get it together! How can one man be so damn good at kissing! Oh boy, he's probably better at doing more than just kissing. With that body of his, I'm pretty sure he knows just how to pleasure a woman. Oh shit! Now I'm thinking about him naked! Oh hell! This is just going too far! I don't know him! I can't dream of love making with a complete stranger! Jesus, this is just crazy!


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"Ok, that was...I-I can't do that again. You're too much! This is too much! I can't control myself around you! You're messing me up!"

"You've been messing me up from the first time you stumbled into my office. Ana, I'm yours. Don't shy away from me please. That kiss was just perfect. I need you baby please." Omg, he's kissing my hand now, softly bruhing his warm lips on my fingers. Those perfectly full lips. I want to taste him again, devour him. Omg, Anastasia Steele! Focus!

" Mr. Gr-Christian...We have to take it slow. I won't lie to you, I want you. My body responds to you in a way it has never done before. To anyone. But I still don't remember you, or us. I can't keep kissing and feeling like this for a total stranger. I need to know you, to get to know you all over again. Please, don't push me"

"Ok. You're right. We'll take it slow. I'm just glad you're not lying to me. We were always honest with one another, no matter what. I want you Ana, I need you. I'll do whatever it takes. I'll take whatever I can get. All I want is for you to love me again" And with that he kisses my forehead, gently and in a very romantic way. Oh god, he's just perfection.

"I'm sorry. I don't remember a thing about us, but it must be hard for you to be around me like this. Kate told me how much I cared for you. According to her I was on cloud nine. I'm really sorry I don't remember anything. I wish I could. I'm really sorry"

"Don't be sorry Anastasia. You're alive and that's all that matters. I'll just have to seduce you all over again" He's smirking widly now! He's gorgeous, even smirking at me.

"Well, you're doing a pretty good job at that. But I guess it can be considered cheating. You already seduced me once. So you're probably using the same moves this time" Now I'm smirking at him. The look on his face is priceless. He's faking an offended look. So cute!

"How can you say that? I would never cheat! There's always a chance you'll remember everything. So I have to play fair" He winks at me and steals one of the red vines.

"Hey, those are mine!" I like it when he's playful. He looks younger and carefree. And beautiful as always.

"Sorry, they're kind of my favourite" He takes a bite looking at me. And I swear he's trying to seduce me. Omg, this isn't fair! He's too good, I can't stand him seducing me like this!

"Hey stop that! You're already hot. I can't dela with you trying to secuce me like that!"

"Me? I would never" He's smirking now. Again. Damn, that's sexy as hell!

"I thought you said you would play fair" I'm pouting, trying to appeal to his sensitive side.

"Trust me. This is me playing fair" The tone of his voice is alluring, almost sexual. Oh hell, what have we done together!

"You're too much! Maybe if you were ugly or poor or dumb. But no! You had to be the perfect man! How is one suppose to resist that?"

"I don't want you to resist me. I want the complete opposite Anastasia"

"Yeah yeah I know. You want me. You need me. You love me...Blah blah blah"

"Don't mock me Anastasia" Wow. Major change in his voice. Creepy.

"I'm not mocking you. I was joking. Jeez. Lighten up will you?" God, what a temper!

"Don't joke about our love Ana. Not that, never that"

"Fine! Whatever! Jeez, I feel like I'm being punished for stealing a cookie from the cookie jar!"

"I'm sorry. I take things too seriously sometimes"

"Yeah, no kidding." I'm a little mad now. I hate people that change their moods like this. Too unstable, too dangerous. Maybe that's his flaw, his temper. Not sure I want to test that theory though. He emanates an aura of power and male dominance. As sexy as that sounds, it scares the shit out of me. He's probably too much of a man for me. I melt with only one kiss. God knows how I would handle anything more. Oh god! I'm so screwed!

"Am I interrupting?"

"Mom! Don't be silly, come on in!"

"Hi sweety! Sorry for coming so late but I had to wait for Bob to get out of work. He's parking the car, he'll be here in a minute. Oh I'm so sorry. Hello Mr. Grey, how are you?"

"Fine, thank you. I'll give you some privacy. I have some business to attend. I'll be back later this evening, is that ok Ana?"

"Yeah, that's fine. So mom, any news for me?" I can feel Christian staring at me. But I'm still mad at him. I don't appreciate being treated like a freaking child by a man I don't even know!

"Ok. It was nice to see you mam. I'll see you later Anastasia" And with that he's gone.

"Ana, why did you treat him like that? That man is completely in love with you. Even I can see that"

"Mom please, I don't want to talk about that"

"Ok, suit yourself. I have some news actually!"

"Good, spill it" I loved my mom, she always had some dirt about the neighbors or anyone she knew. It was like a soap opera, but better!

We gossiped for a while, just the two of us. I missed spending time with my mom, just us girls. It came naturally, and made me feel happy.

"I hope I'm not interrupting anything too important"

"Don't worry Bob, we were just gossiping. Come on in! Thank you for coming. I know it's a long way and you have work. Thanks"

"Nonsense Ana, I'm happy to come. So how are you doing? How's your memory?"

"No improvements I'm afraid. But hey, could be worse"

"Thank god you are alive and well. Apart from the memory loss of course. When Christian called us your mother almost fainted. I've never seen her so terrified in her life"

"Well, it's understandable! My only child was in a Hospital because she was in a car crash. What mother wouldn't lose her mind over that?"

"Calm down mom, I'm fine. Bob was just messing with you" I wink at Bob and he smiles. He's good for my mom, I like him. Although I secretly wished for years that she would go back to my dad Ray. They were just perfect together.

"I know. I'm just glad you're ok that's all"

"Honey, I'm gonna get something to eat. Want anything?"

"No, I'm good. Thank you sweetheart"

"Ok, I'll be abck in a jeefy girls" He winks at me again and then leaves. Weird. He didn't use to wink at me. Oh well, he's probably just happy I'm ok.

"Ana, are you sure you haven't remembered everything?"

"Yeah mom, I'm sure. Why?"

"Just checking sweety. You'll tell me when you do right?"

"Of course! You'll be on the top of my list I promise"

"Ok honey, I'm praying for you"

My mom wasn't one to pray so I knew the situation was taking a toll on her. I wished I wasn't upsetting everyone though. I just wanted to remember and get it over with. This was just torture! And it didn't help that the people around me were acting weird. Or maybe I was the one acting weird. Who knows! Not me apparently! What a mess my life had become!

But then again, I kissed the perfect man twice today. Despite his mood swings and what not, he was still the most beautiful man I had ever seen. And apparently he wanted me. No idea why...Maybe I should just enjoy the ride while it lasted! Some things were just too good to be true so all I could do was seat tight and wait for everything to fall apart...


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"I can't believe I'm going home tomorrow! Finally!"

I was dying to get out of this hospital bed and just go home. Apparently home was an apartment I shared with Kate, somewhere...Don't really care, anything was better than spending every freaking minute staring at this hospital walls. I was losing my mind!

"So you're sure about going to Kate's place? You know you can come home with me and just stay there for as long as it takes honey"

"No way! It's gonna be so much fun! Just us girls hanging out! I mean for Kate it will feel completely normal of course. But I feel like the first time living by myself! I'm so excited!"

"Ok honey, just don't forget you're suppose to take it easy! Loads of rest! No working and stress for you Ana!"

Moms! Always worrying! Even mine...

"I know mom, jeez. Stop worrying so much. I'll be fine. Kate is going to help me with what I need. I'll be ok"

"Of course I worry, you're my daughter Anastasia. I'll check on you as often as I can! Now, remember what we agreed. The moment you get your memory back call me. Ok?"

I don't know why byt my mother's insistence with my memory loss is kind of weird. Porbably my mind overthinking stuff as always...let it go Ana!

"Fine! Don't worry, I'll call you immediately after! Now go, Bob has to work tomorrow mom! I'll be fine. I love you"

"Ok baby, I'll see you tomorrow then. Have a good night honey"

Good grief! I love my mom but having her hovering like this was making me feel pretty awkward. I had been independent for quite a while and she wasn't the most responsible parent outhere, so having her worrying so much was just weird! But I get it, mom's can't help it I guess!

"Mind if I come in?"

Oh boy...here he is. Looking drop dead gorgeous as always. Everything about him screams sex and I can't stop thinking about our kisses every time I see him. He's too good to be true...

"Visiting hours are almost over"

Fuck, that sounded cold. I hope he doesn't get offended by it and leaves!

"I know. Does that mean you want me to go? I don't want to bother you Ana"

Damn, he looks hurt! Nice going Anastasia!

"N-No, I was just saying...Come in if you want"

Good save...poor guy.

"So, I couldn't help but overhear that you're suppose to leave tomorrow. That's great news. I bet you can't wait to get out of here"

"Yeah, I'm going crazy over here. I need to be surrounded by my things and my friends. I don't know where I was living but I bet it's pretty great. Kate has great taste, I'm sure it's a wonderful place. I'm really excited"

Wow, easy on the verbal diarreia Ana! He doesn't care about your stupid rambling!

"You look happy. I like to see you like this. So Ana, I have to ask. Do you think maybe I could come over sometime and just hang out with you?"

What? Hang out? With me? What does that mean? Does he want sex? Oh man! I'm starting to feel my cheeks blushing!

"Hangout?"

I'm so nervous I chuckle at the thought of us hanging out...

"Why are you laughing?"

I offended him again! Anastasia, you're on a roll today...Make it right!

"I'm sorry! It's just funny picturing you, the young billionaire mogul hanging out with someone like me. It's funny"

"Ana, will you stop doing that? You're not just someone. You're the one I love. I just want to be with you, however I can get you. Hanging out seems to be the only way I can do that so I'll do it"

Oh hell, he got deep again. I hate it when he does that, makes me feel things I shouldn't feel for a stranger. Let alone a Greek god sex on legs kind of a man...

"Right, I'm sorry. I just don't know what to say. I mean, I still don't remember you. It's a little weird imagining you at my place, hanging out and stuff. But I'm not saying no, I just think it will be weird"

"It won't. Trust me Ana. Please, I just want to be with you"

The way he's looking at me makes me get hot inside...and down south, between my legs..Hell!

"Yeah sure, I think it will be ok. Maybe you can cook me some dinner!"

Lighten the mood seems to be the best bet!

"Believe me, that would be a horrible experience for you. But I'll settle for nice take out and I'll even set the table and everything. I'll be your personal waiter for the night"

Hmm, having him serving me sounds so good. Attending to my every need...Anastasia!

"Hmm, sounds good to me!"

"Alright then, it's a date"

Oh boy...that makes me even mor nervous! I'll have to ask Kate to help me with this! I can't be alone with him...

"I'm sorry to bother you but visiting hours are over. I'm sorry Mr Grey"

An angel comes in at the right time and completely breaks the moment between us!

"It's fine. I won't be long. Thank you"

He looks annoyed at the poor nurse. Damn, I'm actually sad to see him leaving though...

"I hate to leave you, I hope you know that. I would stay if I could. But you need to rest and I don't want to bother you more than you can take. Can I come tomorrow to help you say goodbye to this place?"

He smiles at me and I can't help but smile back. He's right, I can't wait to just forget I was ever in a Hospital bed.

"Sure, if you can spare some time from your busy work life"

Now I'm smirking at him. Good god, what is wrong with me. I can't handle this man, not a good time teasing him...

"For you I'll do anything. Besides, that's the good thing of being the boss. I get to leave anytime I want"

Good, he took it lightly. Thank god! He's too intense sometimes...

"Well in that case you're free to come and help me get out of here. I can't wait!"

"Me too. I have to go now. Gets loads of rest, tomorrow you'll be sleeping in your own bed. Goodnight Ana"

He looks at me and kisses my forehead. My first instinct is to just grab him and kiss those sweet lips of his. But I restrain myself. And his heavy breathing tells me that maybe he was thinking the same thing...

"Goodbye Christian. I'll see you tomorrow. Thank you for coming. It's nice having you around"

Wow, that was honest...

"I'll never leave your side. As long as you want me here, I'll never leave. Bye Ana"

He strokes my hair and after looking at me for a few long seconds, walks out of the room. I instantly feel like something is missing and the air around becomes colder. Damn, even his presence is enough to warm me up.

Get it together Ana! Go slow! Think first, lust for him later. Yes, that will work...


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

"Rise and shine sweetie! Time to get ready to go home"

Hun? Who is bothering me at this ungodly hour? Not even the sun is awake yet!

"Come on! Time for some breakfast and then a quick sponge bath to freshen you up"

"M-Morning...Sorry, I'm still waking up"

The poor nurse shakes her head and smiles widely at me. Good god, nobody wakes up this happy!

"Ok, seat up! What will it be? Milk? Tea? chocolate milk? Coffee?"

"Hum, Tea please.."

"There you go. Want something to eat?"

"No, thank you"

I'm not hungry at all, but at least tea will go easy on my stomach. Call me crazy, but I 'm starting to get nervous about leaving this place. Everything is becoming too real too soon...

"You're done?"

The nurse is fast...damn.

"Yes, thank you"

"Ok, I'll leave you to wake up for good and then I'll come back to give you a bath ok? The doctor should be here in an hour to talk to you"

"Ok, thanks"

Oh man, the doctor will come to tell me if I am leaving or staying...I want to leave but I'm also scared!

My mind is all over the place! And it doesn't help that I'm left by myself now...

'Ring' 'Ring' 'Ring'

My phone! Thanks god, someone wants to rescue me from my internal rambling!

Oh...it's Christian...

"H-Hi"

"Good morning Ana! Sleep well?"

"Like a baby"

"Good! Look I just want to let you know I'll be there in two hours tops. I don't care about visiting hours today. I want to see you. Is that ok?"

Yes, that is wonderful! I need you here! I miss your touch, your divine smell and your lips! Good grief, I'm completely insane now...

"S-Sure. That's fine"

"Great! I can't wait to see you! I have to go now. Laters babe"

"Bye Christian"

My stomach is officially a knot...he is coming earlier than expected...for me...oh boy!

"Are you ready for your bath honey?"

"Yes please"

Anything to keep my mind from the greyed eyed Adonis looking man coming my way...

After the bath, if you can call it that, I am left by myself again.

Fuck, he's coming and I look like crap! At least today I should look a little better! I scramble through my bag Kte brought for me, with some of my clothes and essential. I find the small make up bag and try to fix the mess my face has become.

I brush my hair a few times and decide on a side braid. Then I brush my teeth, using the bowl the nice nurse left for me to spit the stuff out. Eww.

Anyways...after brushing my teeth I clean my face using a toner that Kate bought me. it's mostly organic and smells amazing, fresh and soft. I put on some moisturizer and finish with some vanilla flavoured lip balm.

Just in case someone decides to kiss me...right...someone with grey eyes and abs like stone...

I put everything back inside the bag just in time. The doctor walks in, and I freeze. This is it...

"Good morning Miss Steele. How are you feeling today?"

"Good morning. I'm great. Can't wait to go home"

"Well, no need to worry. Your labs looks great and the surgery on your leg went perfectly so I see no reason to keep you here. You're free to leave Miss Steele. And I hope you get better. Body and mind"

"Thank you so much doctor! I'm so relieved!"

"Don't mention it. Have a nice day and I hope this is the last I see you around here"

He winks at me and walks away. Doctor visits, fast as lighting...

Oh my god! I'm going home! Wherever that is! I don't care! I'm leaving!

"Good news?"

The nurse comes rushing in. She's actually pretty nice.

"Yes! I won't be bothering you anymore! I'm going home today!"

"Oh sweetie, if every patient was like you, my job would be heavenly! I'm happy for you!"

Ohhh that was so sweet...

"Thanks. You're my favorite nurse just so you know! Don't tell anyone!"

"I won't. Now do you want me to help you get dressed? I'm sure you want to look your best when your walking out of this Hospital!"

"Yes, thank you!"

She then helps me get into a knee length light blue dress, with a sweetheart neckline and an open back. It was a gift from Kate. She insisted I should have something beautiful to wear when I left this place. She was right. I instantly feel better.

I still have a cast on my left leg so I will be wearing only one shoe. Luckily Kate brought my favourite black ballerina flats to match the dress. The look was completed by a white fluffy cardigan to wear outside. I was pleased with the look, and so was the nurse giving me two thumbs up.

Now I was alone again, waiting for someone to come and brighten my day...

Soon enough, he walses in the room carrying a massive bouquet of roses. But they are no ordinary roses, oh no. They are both red and white, beautiful and different from anything I have ever seen before. In the other hand he has a bag of what I can only assume to be some threats for me. I'm already salivating thinking about it...

"Wow. You look beautiful Anastasia"

The way he says my name makes me shiver right down into my very core. He's looking at me with such intensity, blood comes rushing into my cheeks and I'm shamelessly blushing now. Great! I look down trying to hide my ridiculous reaction to his words.

"Ana don't. I love to see you blush. It means I'm doing something right"

He's still looking at me and after handing me the gifts, tilts my head back and very softly, kisses me on the lips. I have to close my eyes because even this tiny moment of intimacy between us is enough to send me down a road filled with desire and lust, a road I don't want to follow now...

"Thank you for the flowers, they are incredible. And the candies are just the topping of a wonderful gesture. Thank you Christian"

"I just want to please you, nothing more. You look stunning Ana. I could stare at you forever and not get bored one second. You're beautiful"

"Christian, please, don't. I don't want to keep blushing..."

"I wouldn't mind if you did...But I get it. So, has the doctor come yet?"

"Yes! I'm free to go home!"

"Really? Like right now?"

"Yes! They say I can have lunch here and then go but I just want to get out of here! I'm so happy!"

"Well then let's go! We'll eat anywhere you want"

He's so excited I chuckle a bit. He looks even more handsome when he smiles like that..

Omg he is so sweet. But I promised Kate I would wait for her...maybe I could call her and ask if she minded to wait for me at home...

"Hum, Kate was suppose to come and pick me up...but I can call her and ask of she minds me going with you...If you really want to take me home of course. I don't want to push this on you"

"Ana please, stop stalling and call Kate. Tell her I'm taking you home and she'll just have to wait for you there"

Wow, he looks determined. Well, I guess I have to call Kate and let her know this. Here goes nothing...

"Kate hi! Look the doctor said I can go now and Christian is already here. He wants to take me home himself. Do you mind?"

"Are you sure you want to go with him? It's fine by me. Whatever you want Ana"

"Yeah, it'll be fine. So I'll see you home?"

"Yes, I'll be here to welcome you with open arms and a bottle of our favourite white wine!"

"Ok, I'll see you soon then!"

"So, ready to go?"

Boy was he excited!

"Yes! I'm gonna need some help though. This cast is kind of heavy and I only practiced yesterday walking on crutches"

Oh man, that's the sexiest thing I could do right now, walking on damn crutches in front of mister perfection...

"I took the liberty of getting you a wheel chair. I thought you might like it better and you can always practice walking on those things at home, safely and without worrying about people looking at you. But it's up to you, I'll help you regardless"

Ohhh that is so nice of him. I can't believe he actually got me a wheelchair...

"Thank you so much Christian. I have to say, wheelchair sounds like heaven. That way I can drive myself"

"Oh no you don't. I'm driving. You just seat there and look beautiful ok? I got it covered"

He then starts grabbing all my stuff and helping me seat up with my legs out of the bed. He calls someone and in a few minutes the wheelchair is here. He helps me seat in it, with so much ease I am stunned. His muscles feel like freaking rocks and I restrain myself from feeling them up!

The man that brought the chair takes my bag and we make our way out of the Hospital faster than I can count to ten. I can't believe I'm actually wheeling away from this place, with Mr. Sex God behind me.

I guess it's true what they say, after a storm comes a calm...

Except this time, I had a feeling things were going to drastically change.

I only hope it's for the better this time, because I'm tired of getting my ass kicked senseless.

I need a freaking break!


	26. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

When we get to his black limousine, he picks me up from the chair and easily puts me inside the limo.

Suddenly, my manners kick in, too little too late I might add...

"I'm so sorry I didn't introduce myself. My name is Anastasia. Thank you so much for helping with the chair and the bag"

The man driving the car is extremely stoic but manages a honest smile and when he speaks, it's acatualy warm. You wouldn't imagine that coming from a man with his stature and poise.

"No problem at all. My name is Taylor. I work for Mr. Grey"

"Oh. Well, nice to meet you Taylor"

"Nice to see you again Miss Steele"

Oh right, I guess I have met him before. Now I'm embarrassed. He sees the look on my face and smiles again at me, clearly trying to appease my mind. It kind of works and I smile back at him. He resumes his driving and I'm left with Christian staring at me.

"Well, now that we all know each others names maybe we should talk about more important things. Like what you would like to eat for example"

"What do you mean? I thought we were going back to Kate's place..."

"We are. After lunch. You said you were hungry. I'm famished. We should eat together"

The tone of his voice let's me know two things: He is hungry. But food isn't what he wants to eat. Oh boy...

"Well, yes I'm starving. And I would love some Italian. I love Italian food."

"Italian it is. I know just the place. Taylor, head for 'Piccolino'"

Then he hits the privacy divider button and we're alone. Again. Oh man, this isn't good...

"Ana, there's something I want to do but I need to know if you're ok with it"

"What is it?"

Oh man, I was really nervous now...

"I want to kiss you. But this time I want you to close your eyes and trust me. Can you do that?"

He looks at me with such longing and passion I don't have it in me to deny him this. So I simply nod.

"Close your eyes"

He whispers, making me softly exhale. I close my eyes and wait for his move. The I feel him, his hand holding my head in place and his lips brushing against my neck. He kisses it and licks it so leisurely I can't help the little moaning sound from escaping my lips.

He groans in my neck and responds with a soft bite to my neck. I wince but stay still. It feels too good, feels right and familiar. Then his assault takes on a whole new level.

When his hand reaches my right leg, my first instinct is to swap it away. But my body has other plans. My legs open shamelessly to let him in and before I can tell him to stop, he kneels in front of me and starts kissing and nibbling my inner thighs. The feeling is amazing. It's like he knows exactly where to touch to make me crazy!

He looks up at me and after seeing the look on my face, smirks at me and without a warning, puts his head between my legs! His mouth is there, in that place! He's licking and sucking and blowing.

OMG! It's soooo good! He's sooo amazing! His tongue is like magic, hitting all the right spots, swirling at the perfect rhythm. Not too fast, not to slow. Not to rough, not to soft. Just perfect!

He holds my legs in place and keeps assaulting me with his mouth! I can feel my whole body starting to tremble and right before it happens he snaps at me.

"Come Ana. Come for me baby. Now!"

And I do as he asks. I come violently and intensely, with his mouth still there! OMG. Eww!

If this is what an orgasm was, I finally understand why people valued them so much! It was like my body needed this. Like I was craving for this without even knowing it!

It was, hands down, the most incredible and unforgettable experience of my life!

And the man that gave all of that to me is now licking his lips and smirking shamelessly at me...

"I just had to taste you Ana. You are so sweet"

I'm dumbfounded. Not only has he just make me come using nothing more than his mouth, but he is actually licking my orgasm off his lips. That wis insane and extremely hot!

"That was incredible"

I'm almost out of breath. And it doesn't help that he's practically eye fucking me right now.

"That was just a little sample Ana. We're capable of much more than this. Let me show me"

The lust in his eyes wis so there I have to look down to keep myself from getting wetter than I already am.

"Ana, don't shy away from me. I want you. I'm crazy about you. I need you"

He touches my face and makes me look at him. His eyes are all pleading and needy...

"I want you too. I can't fight it anymore. What I feel for you can't be explained or ignored. But I need time. I need to know you better. Is that ok?"

Honesty, seems to be the right way to go about this...

Without saying a word, he kisses me. This time, the kiss is all about sex, passion and burning desire. After he's done, I'm out of breath. And so is he. Then he talks.

"I'll do anything you want. I'll give you all the time in the world. I ask only one thing in return"

Oh no, what...

"What?"

"Your lips touch only my own. I want to know you won't kiss anyone else but me."

Uhh, he's possessive...not sure that's a good thing or a bad thing...

"You want exclusivity of my lips?"

"Yes. Your lips are mine and my lips are yours. That's it"

Ok, that's kinda hot...

"Only the lips?"

What the hell? Where did that come from?

"And everything else you choose to give me and only me. You already know I'm yours. Every bit of me belongs to you"

Damn it, that was even hotter...He's too damn good!

"I like that."

Ok, I'm definitely in need of some food because I'm losing my mind..

"I knew you would"

Of course he did...

"Sorry to interrupt. But we're here sir"

Taylor's voice breaks the moment. Maybe some food will ease the fire burning inside me. Because I'm pretty sure my body is still yearning for him...

"I wish I could eat you all over again. But you need to be fed. Maybe after that I can make you come again. Now that is something to look forward."

He whispers into my lips, lightly brushing my inner thigh while he does it!

Omg what is he doing to me!

I want him...Oh god help me! I want him so much I'm wet again!

"Stop looking at me like that Ana or I'll take you again this minute. I'm barely keeping it together as it is..."

"Sorry. I was just thinking. Let's just go eat"

"Fine. Let's get this over with so I can go back to my favorite course"

And he looks at me with the most mischievous smile I have ever seen.

This man might look like a perfect Angel, but he's filled with unholy thoughts!

Dear lord, how can anyone resist him? I sure as hell can't, that has been proven.

Over and over and over again...


	27. Chapter 27

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

* * *

"You're too quiet. What's up?"

His gaze on me is incredible off-putting. I can't seem to get my head around what just happened in his limo...

I had my first orgasm in a limo, thanks to his highly gifted mouth. Pretty sure that mouth should be illegal. And that tongue is pure sin!

Though I'm pretty sure I'm not done being sinful just yet...

But I don't think that was my first orgasm...Those memories are still locked away in the back of my messed up mind...

Now I really wish I remembered everything!

I mean, if he can make me feel like this using nothing but his mouth, one can only imagine what the rest of his body can do for me...

"I just can't believe we just did that.. In the back of a car. With someone in the driving seat! It's insane!"

"Why? I thought you liked it..."

He looks sad and disappointed! Oh no! That's not what I meant!

"I did! Of course I did. That was pretty obvious...I just can't believe I let you do that to me. No one has ever done that to me. Ever..."

I suddenly feel ashamed of this confession. I have no idea if he knew I was a virgin or not...He probably did right?

"I know Ana. You gave yourself to me before. You trusted me. And I'll make sure you keep trusting me. Always"

He grabs my hand and kisses it, softly brushing his soft lips in my knuckles as he does. That makes me exhale deeply.

This man is just pure sex and lust, wrapped in a perfectly toned body, topped with the most alluring grey eyes I have ever seen in my life!

And he wants me! Plain, ordinary, nothing much Ana Steele...My mind still has trouble understanding that.

"I'm sorry. This just feels like my first orgasm. I'm embarrassed, that's all."

He looks offended by it...And I couldn't be more red if I wanted to...

"What? Why? Ana, you have nothing to be embarrassed about! I plan on making you come as many times as you let me. It's an amazing feeling that I hope you keep reserved just for me"

Wow...I don't know what to say...

"It's just...Christian you are a beautiful man. Incredibly sexy and obviously amazing in everything you do. And I'm just me. Please hear me out"

I put a finger on his lips to keep him from protesting. I knew he would but I have to get this out of my chest.

"I felt completely embarrassed to have you do that to me. I mean, you're exactly the kind of man every woman secretly wishes for and you were doing that to me. I just don't understand why. And I don't think you should do it again. You don't have to. I'm still not ready to have sex with you, so you don't have to do that. I don't want you to feel obligated to do that for me. It's embarrassing and I'm fine without it"

There, that's that. I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding. I'm avoiding looking at him. I feel so exposed right now.

I just blurted out every deep and uncomfortable thought I had inside of me...But what's worse is that he's in complete silent!

Oh god. This is it. He finally came to his senses and realized I'm just too little for him. Too ordinary.

"Ana, just tell me one thing. Why exactly do you feel embarrassed about having my mouth between your beautiful legs?"

What? is he serious? He wants me to elaborate on it? How the hell can I talk about that? Is just too weird, too awkward!

"Christian please! I can't talk about that."

Great, now I'm blushing like crazy! Oh god, why does he do this?

"Ana, talk to me. Just be honest with me. There's no need for embarrassment. Please baby, just tell me"

He's whispering into my very soul. His eyes filled with understanding and love...He's so dreamy like this.

"Fine. I just don't want you to degrade yourself because you feel like I want that. You don't have to. I know that's disgusting and I don't want you to feel the need to do it for me. That's it"

Damn it. I feel so bad right now. The thought of having him agreeing with what I just said makes me sick. I know that doing that is just weird. I wish he hadn't now.

I wish we had just drove home and kept our relationship like it was, slightly flirtatious but safe.

Then the strangest thing happens. He bursts into laughter. The sound takes me by complete surprise! I love it. I absolutely love it. He looks even more beautiful, if that's even possible. But he's laughing at me. Because of what I said. He's mocking me!

Damn it! Why is he laughing? I feel beyond embarrassed. I want to get out of here and just forget all about this!

"Great. Now you're laughing at me. This is just stupid. We should go. I want to go home please"

I turn my face away from him and release the silver wear on the plate so harshly I almost break it. I don't care. I'm mad and hurt. I just want to go home. I cross my arms and wait for him to also finish his meal. He looks surprised and a little scared. Good. Cause I'm pissed!

"Ana calm down. I'm not laughing at you. Baby I'm sorry. I was just taken aback by what you said. Please don't be mad at me. Look at me Ana please"

He touches my cheek and grabs my chin to make me face him but I deny his touch. I'm too rattled up to allow him to lure me back in. I keep staring at my fingers on my lap and just wait for him to explain what just happened...

"Ana please, can you look at me? Please baby"

"Why did you laugh?"

It's all I can say. I can't even look at him. I'm so damned hurt!

"Ana, I'm sorry! The only reason I laughed was because the thought of me pleasuring you being degrading or disgusting to me is just ludicrous! I adore you! I love every inch of your perfect little body Ana! I need to feel you, as much as I need to breathe! If I could survive with nothing but you and your gorgeous body that's how I wanted to live! I love to taste you, every bit of you! And making you come is my life goal! There's nothing about you that disgusts me or makes me feel shameful. I want you Ana. All of you! Please baby, I'm sorry!"

Oh...well that's...oh...

"I-I don't know what to say...I..."

Now I'm ashamed for making him feel so bad. What is wrong with me? He has been nothing but truthful with me. Patient. Sexy. Loving. Understanding. Perfect. Why am I being so stupid?

"Please, just say you believe me! I can't stand knowing I hurt you! I'm so sorry I laughed Ana. It's just absurd to me that you would feel I didn't like to touch you and taste you. I need you baby. So much. I love you Ana"

The plead in his voice and his eyes is so intense I lose control of my body entirely. I lunge myself into his arms and lock my lips with his, letting go of all the stupid hurt and insecurities.

His hands are on my ass as soon as he realizes what's happening. I moan at his sudden grip on my behind and start stroking his tongue, mimicking his earlier moves in the limo. He growls and squeezes my ass a little more. I can feel his erection starting to grow beneath my core. I can't help the soft moan that escapes my lips. He smiles into my lips and kisses me harder. Like he needs to. Like his life depends on the ferocity of our kiss.

"Oh baby. You're so beautiful. I need you Ana. Let me show you just how much I love you. Please"

The implication in his plead is clear. He wants me. In his bed. Or his couch. Or his limo. I have no idea.

And do I care? It's pretty clear I want him too. My body is completely attuned to his. Every time he touches me, my inside's melt. So what's holding me back?

"Please. Stop thinking. Do what makes you feel good baby. Let me love you"

This time he whispers right into my ear, licking and biting my ear love as he does. Oh god! That's so hot!

"Yes. Please! Show me! I want you Christian. I want you so much"

The words escape my lips before I can control them. But that's all the incentive he needs. He pushes himself up, still carrying me while squeezing my ass. Then he slowly releases me, but keeps me close to him. His body is so warm and rock solid. My breathing is now completely erratic and I can't wait to feel every inch of his perfect body on top of mine. Oh god!

He mumbles something into his phone, never leaving my face. The fire burning behind those gorgeous grey eyes is enough to have me panting and wet for him. The man is pure sex.

In seconds we are inside his limo again, going god knows where, more than ready to reap each others clothes off and lose ourselves in a long night of lust, passion and complete devotion os each others bodies...

And I couldn't be more ready...I've been ready for what feels like forever...


	28. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

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"Oh god! Christian..."

"You smell so good baby. And you taste even better"

I have no idea for how long we have been driving. Probably because I was too busy losing myself in his touch. The man is incredibly gifted, and everything he's doing to my body is pure joy!

He's done 'that' again, and this time he made sure I knew just how much pleasure he took from doing it...

I still feel weird having him there, doing that with his mouth. But he's so good I forgot all about my doubts and just let him take me places I never even dreamed possible before!

"Come on baby. We're here. Finally!"

Even though I'm not 100% to be doing anything more than kust making out, Christian insisted I slept with him, in his bed. It's like he needs to keep me close. For me it's all about getting t know him in a deeper level...

We reach the elevator and this time we're alone, Taylor stayed behind doing something else...probably was just giving us privacy...

Oh god Taylor, I'm so ashamed! He was in the car while we were doing that! Poor man!

"I just can't keep my hands of you! You're my addiction Ana. Only mine"

His desire for my body brings me back from my internal rambling and he loses no time making sure I know he wants me. He cups my ass and pushes me up, careful not to hurt my already damaged leg. Now I'm wrapped around him, cast and all, and I can feel his massive erection wanting to break free...Oh boy...

He kisses my neck and gently bites it, making me gasp for air. Then one of his hands starts exploring my breasts. He never touched me there! The feeling is amazing! His hands know exactly what to do and how to make it more pleasurable for me!

I guess he's cheating now, doing everything he has done to me before and causing the same reactions...

Anastasia, do you really care about that? Stop over thinking everything and just go with it!

"Oh god! That feels so good"

Before I know it we're inside his apartment, apparently. And it's huge. I want to explore this place, but he has other plans. I guess he has other kind of exploring in his sexy mind...

"Tell me Ana. Tell me what you want me to do to you"

He gently places me on a bed and whispers those words into lips. It's so sexy when he does that! Every inch of my aroused body melts when he whispers into my lips. I love it!

What? Tell him what I want? I have no idea! I've never done this before...

"I want you Christian. I want all of you. Make love to me"

The small sexy smile creeping in his face let's me know that's exactly what he was looking to hear.

"You're still not ready for that baby. But I want to make you feel good. I need to"

He loses no time and starts undressing me. Very slowly. Kissing my body as he goes along. His hands are so warm and experienced I let him take over. I want him to take over. He clearly knows what to do and how to please me...

"Baby touch me. I'm yours. Do what you want to me"

His voice is now barely a whisper, making me almost come just by hearing him. He's hovering over me, keeping the wight on his elbows. He slowly brings his body down so I can feel him. All of him. And he's so warm. And toned. He's perfection.

I don't know what takes over me but I don't care anymore. I start undressing him, slowly like he did, never leaving his eyes. He's watching me do it, breathing hard and licking his lips while I undress him. He's so hot I have to focus hard to get the task done.

When I reach his pants, I touch his erection and feeling it throbbing beneath my hand, I start massaging it. Up and down. I have never done this before! But my hand seems to know just how to do it so I let it do it's thing.

"Oh god. I missed your touch so much baby"

He's moaning and his breathing is becoming more erratic as I go by. I take his pants and his boxers off as fast as I can.

He's now gloriously naked, and he's all mine.

"You're beautiful"

I murmur into his lips, making him moan. He grasb my breats and starts massaging them, each at a time. I start rubing myself in his erection, going up and down just like I did with my hand before. I'm pretty sure I'm masturbating myself using his erection. And it feels so good!

"Oh baby, you're so wet. I can feel it. I want you so much baby"

He breathes the words out with such longing and yearning I can't take any much longer.

"Take me. Make love to me Christian. Please. I need you"

He looks at me for a few seconds, searching for any doubt for my part. He won't find any. I want this! I lick my lips and that does it. He's on it in a second! He starts kissing my body, and when he reaches my pantires he whispers.

"How much do you love these panties baby?"

His question takes me by surprise. Honestly I could care less about the damn panties! He can reap those off for all I care!

"I don't care for them at all"

He grins and without any effort he reaps them apart. We're now completely naked, about to do something I've never done before. And I couldn't be more sure about this. I want him. I want this...

"Oh baby, I missed you so much. I don't want to hurt you so we'll start slow ok?"

I nod, eager to just feel him inside me. If it feels as good as having his tongue inside me, I'm in for a really good time!

Slowly, he positions himself on top of me, kissing me and licking my neck. I can feel the tip of his erection brushing my clit and I gasp. I'm so excited I could come with the slightest right move!

_Ring Ring Ring_

"My phone..."

Is all I can whisper. Christian stills, staring at me.

"Let it ring baby. We waited too long for this moment"

He's right. I know he did. But it's pretty late and my phone never rings so late. Maybe it's Kate. Probably worried I'm not home yet. I have to calm her down. Though I have no idea what I'm gonna say to explain I'm not going home just yet...

"It's probably Kate. Just give me a second Christian. Then I'm all yours"

I try to seduce him with my eyes and trying to reason with him. Even though I have no desire to escape his delicious entrapment...

"Don't move! I'll get the damn phone!"

He pratically growls the words out. I can see just how much he's dying to take me. His erection it's at full attention. And my god, is that an impressive sight...He crawls out of bed as fast as he crawls back in.

He hands me the phone and let's me answer the call. I was right, it's Kate!

Well, I need to make this quick because my body is already screaming for more Christian alone time! He grinns at me, like he can read my thoughts and starts kissing me all over, making it very hard to focus on the call.

"K-Kate. What's up?"

"Ana where are you?"

The tone of her voice tells me something is wrong. Very wrong.

"I'm with Christian. What's wrong Kate?"

I signal Christian to stop what he's doing and he looks worried. And a bit annoyed to say the truth.

"It's Elliot! I think he had a heart attack! We're in the Hospital right now and they're checking him out as we speak. I need you here Ana. Please"

"Oh god. We'll be right there! Hold on Kate! Elliot will be fine!"

As I speak the words I can see Christian's eyes darkening with concern for his brother. I hang up and try to compose myself before telling him what happened.

"Ana what's wrong with Elliot?"

"It was Kate. She thinks Elliot had a heart attack. He's in the Hospital getting ckecked out right now"

That's all he needs to hear. He jumps off the bed and starts dressing himselg up again. He hands me my clothes and I make fast work to get dressed and in a few minutes we're rushing to see his brother, hoping to see him safe and sound, making jokes like nothing's wrong...

The moment is officially gone. I can see Christian's face and he's gone some place dark and cold. I grab his hand and squeeze it, trying to bring him back to me. He looks at me and swallows hard.

He's nervous. And my heart hurts for him. If he looses his brother I know it will devastate him. They're really close. No, he'll be fine. He has to.


	29. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

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The entire ride to the Hospital is made in silent. Christian is so nervous and tense, I don't really know what to do.

I feel nervous too. Elliot is Kate's boyfriend and she really likes him. I think she might even love him.

Poor Kate...And poor Christian. He really likes Elliot too. They get along great. Oh god, I hope he's ok...**  
**

We arrive at the Hospital and Christian is a wreck. He's ordering people around, yelling and fuming at their incompetence. I try to calm him down but he's so rallied up I'm a bit scared of him.

Finally we manage to find Kate and she's a mess. She's been crying for hours, I'm sure. As soon as she sees me she jumps into my arms and starts sobbing uncontrollably.

I've never seen her this scared before. My heart is crying for her.

"Kate, where's my brother?"

Christian's voice is pure ice. I know he's worried but seeing him push everyone away because of his own pain, hurts me more than I want to admit.

I wish he could just seek comfort in my arms, like Kate is doing. Instead he's completely closed of. I feel bad for him...

"H-He's still in surgery...*snif*...No one is telling me anything! I'm losing my mind!"

She cries out and continues sobbing in my neck. Poor Kate, she really loves him.

"This is bullshit!"

Christian yells and storms out, into the restricted area and starts yelling at everyone. I look at Taylor and I can see he's trying really hard to keep Christian in check, but to no good. He'll do his own thing now.

After a few minutes, a surgeon comes to talk to us. Apparently Elliot suffered from a heart defect and with the accumulation of stress, he collapsed. The surgery went on perfectly and he should make a full recovery. That is a relief.

Although I know we will all feel a lot better once Elliot is up and making jokes as usual...

"Oh Ana. I just want to see him"

Kate whispers into my ear and I have no idea what to do. Elliot just got out of surgery so he'll be in recovery for at least 24 hours, since it was a serious surgery. I know she needs to see him but all we can do now is wait...

"When can we see him?"

Christian steps in, his voice all demanding and powerful. The surgeon takes a small step back and I see a small grin starting to form in Christian's face. I bet he's used to have this effect on people.

Personally, I'm not loving this side of him. He's scaring the holy jesus out of me.

"I'm sorry, but we need to keep him under surveillance for the next 24 hours. After that, if he recovers as we expect, you can go and visit him. But I assure you, he will be fine. You just need to be a little patient"

Christian scowls at the poor surgeon and I can't help but stare at him. I'm getting annoyed by his lack of control and petty behaviour.

I know he's hurting, but so is Kate. And she's not making everyone's life a living hell by acting like a petulant child.

"Thank you. Please, make sure he's taken care of. And try to keep updating us on his condition"

I try to reason with the surgeon. He nods and walks away, probably glad to not have to deal with Mr. Man Child over here.

"Christian, please try to calm down. You're not doing any of us any good by acting out like that"

My voice is calm and collected, I don't want to upset him more than necessary.

"Anastasia, that's my brother in there. I won't calm the fuck down because I can't see him and I have no idea if he's going to be ok. So stop worrying about how I'm acting and take care of yourself and Kate. I don't need anyone telling me what to do or how to fucking do it thank you very much."

He's getting snippy with me and I'm over it. If he wants to be an ungrateful brat so be it. I don't need to be told twice I'm not needed. I turn to Kate and start consoling her again. She's getting calmer but she's still crying.

I hate to see her cry. She's the strongest person I know, she rarely cries. For her to be sobbing like this means that she really loves Elliot. She won't make it if he doesn't. I need to take care of her.

"Kate, maybe we should go eat something. They won't come back with news for a while now. Is that ok?"

"Y-Yeah. I guess that's fine"

"Ok. We'll go get something to eat. We won't be long"

I'm still mad at Christian for being such an asshole to me, so I decide to speak only to Taylor. He nods and looks a bit uncomfortable being stuck in the position of messenger.

But I have to shrug it off. Kate needs me and I intend to help her every way I can.

We get up and make our way into the Cafeteria. I sense Christian's eyes on me, but I don't care. He can go cry in Taylor's shoulders for all I care...

"Ana, I can't live without him...I...I love him so much"

Kate's voice is barely a whisper. This isn't my friend. The fierce force of nature that concquers anything she sets her brilliant mind to. She's broken. She's in love and suffering for it.

"Kate, he'll be fine. You can't assume the worse. He's in there, fighting to get better for you. You'll be in his arms in no time you'll see"

I stroke her hands and try to enfuse her with some form of hope and reassurance that everything will be fine, eben though I know just how messy a heart surgery can get. That's how my birth father died, he didn't make it...

"You're right. I have to be strong. Elliot would have my ass if he saw me like this. Thank you Ana, I'm really happy to have you in my life."

"Me too Kate. And yes, he would!"

We giggle together, and for a split second is like nothing has happened and we're just two girls having a good time. I miss those days. The carefree days, when our only concern was what ind of wine to pair with the gigantic pizza we ordered...

"I called Grace. His mother. She's also a doctor and she'll be here as fast as she can. Once she sees him I can relax. I trust her"

"Wow. You've met her already?"

"Yeah. She's pretty awesome. And his father too. Carrick, he's a lawyer and a very sweet man. They have a daughter too. Mia. She's a firecracker that one. Elliot loves her so much. Christian too. He's just a little uptight"

"Yeah. He's got a lot hidden behind the good looks. I'm not sure I want to get to know him after all"

"What? Why Ana? You love him...Or loved...I'm sorry. I know you hate when I talk about before but it's true. You were completely head over heels with him. I actually thought you would elope and just get married in Vegas or something"

"What? Me? Marrying in Vegas? Marrying at all? Come on Kate, you know me better than anyone. Marriage is not a personal dream of mine. And imagining spending the rest of my life with Christian...well, let's just say I'm not entirely sure that would be a great idea"

"What happened? As he done anything? Because I can kick his ass right now if you want me too!"

"No, calm down you crazy woman. He's just too complicated. He's too unstable. Before you called we were having a very emotional moment. Now, I'm scared to even talk to him, let alone touch him. He's so pissed and out of control I'm scared to be around him. He scares me."

"He's a very intense person, I guess you already know that. He just deals with things in a different way. I know it's bad for you trying to keep up with his mood swings. And honestly, if Elliot was here, he would tell you to give him hell for it. But you have to be the one to find out how to deal with Christian. In good and bad times alike. If you want him in your life, you need yo embrace all his facets."

"Why are you so defensive of Christian? I thought you didn't like him..."

"I'm not his biggest fan, that's for sure. But I was the one to see him completely broken, when you were sleeping. He was a mess. I saw love in his eyes, real love. So I guess I'm a sucker for a happy ending. Sue me!"

"Ok ok. I get it. I don't know. et's just wait for Elliot to wake up. Then I'll think about everything else"

With that we make our way back into the waiting room. Christian is in there, his head hanging in his shaky hands, resting on his knees. I want to soothe him so bad. But I restrain myself. I don't want him to snap at me again.

I take a seat, between him and Kate. I can see tears running down his hands and my heart is now bleeding for him. He's such a strong man, to see him crying and feeling hopeless like this just breaks my heart into a million pieces. If only he wasn't such a thick head, I could be helping him right now...

"Ana, do something. Show him you care"

Kate whispers into my ear and I can see the worried look on her face. She cares for her lover's brother. And so do I. But I'm scared of what he might do. I have to try though. I owe it to Elliot and myself to try and calm Christian down.

I don't really know where to touch him so I settle for the shoulders. I place my hand on his left shoulder and I feel him twitch. I'm preparing to be slapped away or yelled at.

That doesn't happen.

Instead, I feel him relax. After wiping away the remainder of his tears with his sleeves, he rises up and turns to me, placing his hand on my knee. He stares into my eyes for a few seconds, and without a warning, places his head in my right shoulder and breathes into my neck. It feels so good having him there, I almost forget we're in a freaking Hospital...

"I'm sorry. I was a jerk to you. I'm really sorry Ana. I just don't know what to do. I'm scared"

The fear in his whispering voice causes such an emotional response to my entire body I have to try harder not to start sobbing this instant. Instead, I choose to calm him down and start stroking his hair. I think he likes it...

"It's ok. Don't worry. Elliot will be just fine"

I can feel him relax almost entirely under my touch. He was really tense. Poor man, always so controlled and in check with his emotions, that now he has no freaking clue what to do with himself...

"I love you Ana. I need you. More than anything in the world. I need you. Don't leave me. Don't give up on me please"

He whispers in my neck, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me closer to him. I fight the impulse to jump into his lap. Don't know why that was my first response though...

"I'm not going anywhere. It's ok Christian. I'm here. I won't leave you."

He kisses my neck and that is enough to ignite the fire burning in my very core. How is it possible for this man to arouse me so easily in such a sad surrounding?

"I know it seems wrong, but I would take you now if I could. I'm completely powerless Ana. You've stripped me bare. I can't function without you in my life anymore. All I want is you. All the time. It's insane"

"I was feeling the same. Is it wrong to want to kiss you now?"

He doesn't respond.

Instead he does what we both were needing for a long time. He pulls me even closer and kisses me hard. It's like a freaking exorcism. We're releasing our bodies from our demons, by showing how much we crave for one another. After we're done, we need a few seconds to catch our breaths.

And suddenly I'm hit with an enormous feeling of shame!

Here I am kissing the man of my dreams, while Kate is hurting for her own dreamy guy. Some friend you are Anastasia!


	30. Chapter 30

_**New Chapter everyone! So sorry for the ridiculous delay! Massive Writer's block! Hope you guys like it and review at will ;)**_

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**Disclaimer: I own nothing other than my creative license to bend this story how I see fit! ;)**

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"Carla just stop! I told you already! I have no idea why she would say something like that! I love her like a daughter! I would never hurt her!"

"Why would she make up such a ridiculous lie? I don't understand! She has such a good head on her shoulders! She's not one to make up stupid stories just for the sake of it! Tell me the truth Bob!"

"Damn it Carla! Enough! I told you, what she said is a lie! I have no idea why she made it up! Now stop this!"

"I want the damn truth! My daughter is not a liar! And I regret not believing her when she called me in the first place! Something is very wrong here and I demand to know the truth!"

"I said stop! I won't say it again! Enough of this crap Carla!"

"Or what Bob? Hun? Tell me the truth!"

"ENOUGH!"

Slap! OMG!

The fuck just happened...He slapped me! He fucking hit me! What the hell!

"You hit me! You fucking hit me! You asshole!"

"Jesus Carla. Look at what you made me do. I...I'm sorry. You pissed me off...I lost control. I'm so sorry"

He's actually trying to blame me for hitting me? The fucking jackass! How dare he?

"It's my fault? How dare you? You're a fucking rat that's what you are! Now I know she was telling the truth! I can't believe you fooled me for so long! Get out! Get the fuck out of my house! Or I'll call the police! GET OUT!"

"Carla, please! It was a mistake. I'm sorry. Please, calm down"

"GET THE FUCK OUT!"

"Ok! Ok I'll leave! Please, calm down. I'm sorry. I didn't hurt Ana. I love her. I love you. I'm sorry"

He tries to touch my face but I won't let him. He hit me. There's no turning back from that. I back away and gesture towards the door. He nods and hastily makes his way toward the door. After he leaves, I lock the door. What do I do? Should I call the police? I need to call Ana. No. She doesn't remember. Thank god. I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for not believing her. She was right about him. He is a filthy beast and he fooled me well for far too long. So what do I do? I need help...Ray. He'll know what to do.

* * *

Fuck! Damn it man! You fucking lost it for a second and you ruined everything! Now she won't take you back and you'll lose Ana in the process!

She'll call her immediately, to warn her...well, maybe not. Maybe she won't, because Ana is still suffering from memory loss. She won't tell her about me because she will have to tell her that she didn't believe her in the first place. I know Carla. She feels guilty and will probably keep this a secret as long as she can. I need to get to her before she calls her. I need to get Ana before she finds out about me through her mother.

She'll think ill of me and completely misinterpreted my feelings for her. I need to let her know the love I feel is pure. The only reason I stayed with Carla all this years was to be close to Ana. I knew she was innocent and possibly a virgin so I wanted to make sure that she trusted me enough, so I could finally declare my love for her. But she decided to move in with Ray. Bastard. He stole her from me. She loves him more than me, I know that. But I can make her love me. She'll learn to love me too. She will...

* * *

"Kate? Sweetie, wake up"

Kate has fallen asleep with her head in my lap and her legs curled between two chairs. She can't be comfortable...the poor thing.

"Hun? W-What? Elliot!"

"It's ok. He's still in surgery. One of the nurses came to tell us the surgery is going well. They will be done in a few minutes, she thinks"

"Oh. Oh god Ana. I can't lose him"

She blinks her eyes a couple times and I can see fresh tears starting to form. She's so scared it's unreal. I have never seen her like this before...

"You won't. He will be fine Kate"

"You don't know that..."

Her voice barely a whisper, makes me feel really uneasy. God, I do hope he makes it. I can't bear to lose my best friend. And she will be lost if he dies...

"Hope Kate. It's all we can do. Hope he makes it"

She nods, slowly and hides her face in her hands, new tears running down her fingers. Poor thing, she is truly afraid...Christian must be insane too...Where is he by the way? I closed my eyes for a few minutes and now he's gone...

"Taylor, where's Christian?"

"He'll be back shortly Miss Steele. He had a call to make"

"Oh, okay"

* * *

"Elena!I don't give a fuck about your apologies or excuses for what you did! It's unforgivable! You can rot in hell for all I care!"

"Christian please! I helped you when no one would give a fuck about you! I make you in the man you are today! You owe me for your damn life! Please! Forgive me! I was crazy and I lost my mind for a second! It won't happen again!"

"Are you fucking kidding me? You made me?If anything you fucked me up more than I already was! You're the reason I can't let anyone love me! You're the reason my life is so fucked up! All I want is distance from you and if I never hear from you again, that will be fine by me! What you did was deliberate and completely unforgivable! We are done. Go to hell where you belong you fucking bitch!"

I end the damn call and almost crash the damn phone into the Hospital wall. She has some nerve calling me! Who the fuck does she think she is! She made me?! Yeah, she made me into a fucking disgusting screwed up excuse of a man! That's what she did!

No, forget about it. She is the past. The dark and twisted past I left behind. Ana is all I need. She is my more. I need her in my life and I'll make sure she never leaves me again.

Now I need to focus on Elliot. I can't lose my brother. Not before I tell him how much he means to me. He was always there for me, no matter how much of a fucker I was. He always supported me and made me see I was loved. I owe him an apology and a promise to be better.

* * *

"Fuck!"

"Time's up! Back to your cell Elena!"

"I heard you the first time!"

"Watch your tone! Now get up and start walking!"

Fucking bitch, telling me what to do and how to do it! You have no idea who I am or what I am capable of little bitch! That freaking stick you carry around is nothing compared with the force of my hands. I would break you in seconds!

Oh Christian Grey, you little fuck. I'm in the fucking prison because of you. I made you into the successful man you are today and for what? You back stab me and throw me into a fucking cell for it. So I went a little crazy and kidnapped you. So what? I love you, and all is fair in love and war.

Except love is out of the picture right now, it seems. Oh well, I guess that leaves war then.

I made you. I might as well break you too. You fucking prick, you will be sorry for betraying me. I'll destroy you and everything you love. You will come back crawling faster than you can't count to ten, and asking for my forgiveness like the fucking dog you are!

And I will give it to you because I love you. But not before a very well deserved biting of course!

* * *

"Sir. Elliot is out of the surgery. The doctor said it went well and now we just need to wait for him to wake up"

"Good. Ana everything ok?"

I can see her eyeing me suspiciously and for a moment I wonder if she heard my conversation. But I wave that thought away, I was alone. I made sure of it.

"Where were you?"

"Outside. I needed to take a call. I'm sorry I left without saying anything but you were so peaceful I didn't want to wake you up"

"Oh. It's ok. I was just worried"

"You were?"

I whisper into her ear, causing her to shiver a little. I love it that she's so receptive to me. Makes my insides melt and lust for her all the more. And to know she worries about me, is the best feeling ever. She makes me want to be a better man. Only her.

"Of course I was. I want to be here for you Christian"

"I know baby. Thank you. I need you. More than I can say"

She blushes and tries to look away but I softly grab her chin and turn her to face me. I need her to know I'm serious about needing her in my life.

"Ana, I need you. I can't live without you anymore. You're my everything. I want more, but only with you"

"More?"

That is all she can whisper. I can see her surprise and possible, apprehension? Yes baby, more. Much more. I want everything you'll be giving to give me. I want the world, with you.

"I want you. All you can give me. And I'll do anything to keep you happy and by my side. I won't let you go Ana, never again. What happened to Elliot only made me see how precious life can be and how fast we can lose all we care about. I won't make the mistake of letting you go again. I promise"

"Christian, it's ok. You don't need to promise me anything. I know you're in pain now. I just want to help and be here for you"

"Then believe my words and the sentiment behind them. Please Ana"

"Ok. I believe you"

"I need you so much baby"

I whisper into her ear again, this time brushing my lips on her neck, breathing the sweet scent that is Anastasia. My favourite scent. And all mine if I get my way!

"Christian, Kate is suffering. I can't keep kissing you while she's like this. I'm sorry"

"I understand. I'm sorry. It's hard to control it you know. You're just too damn addictive"

I grin at her and she smiles. Her beautiful smile, how I missed it. She's truly perfect.

* * *

"Carla? Calm down. What happened?"

"Ray it's Bob! He hit me!"

"What?"

My voice comes out so menacing and cold I can hear her take a deep breath before saying anything more. And it all depends on what her next words will be...

"Ray, he kidnapped Ana. Before the accident. She called me and told me that but I didn't believe her! She told me he said he loved her and wanted her and that he needed her. She told me this and I didn't believe her! Then she had the accident and she forgot all of it. I confronted Bob today, we had a fight and he hit me. He never did anything like this before. I kept pushing him to tell me the truth and he just lost it. Omg Ray, she was right! He is a maniac! I'm so scared!"

Deep breaths Ray, in and out. Calm down. Close your eyes and calm down...WHAT THE FUCK!

"Carla, where is he?"

"He left. I kicked him out."

"Okay. You did the right thing. I'll call a friend of mine in California Police and he will take your statement and any proof of the attack. You need to put this on record. After that, you pack his shit and get someone to change the locks today! Are you in pain?"

"Nothing I can't handle. Ray...I'm scared"

"I know. I'll call Ana and warn her to stay away from him. She'll need an explanation but I know she'll do as I say. We can tell her the truth after I take care of him. I'll get on the first plane to Florida and meet you at your place. Remember, pack his shit, change the locks. Everything is going to be ok baby. Trust me"

"Ok. Please hurry"

"See you in a few hours"

The fucking shit! I'm gonna kill him! I'm gonna twist his neck, cut his balls and shove them down his throat! He will never touch Ana or Carla again. He's dead.

* * *

"Dad? Everything ok?"

"Ana, listen to me carefully. I need you to do something. I know it will sound weird but trust me and do as I say ok sweetie?"

"Dad you're scaring me. What's going on?"

"Bob hit your mother. He's not the person we thought he was. Whatever you do, stay away from him. Please, trust me ok? Where are you now?"

"He what? Omg! Is she ok? I'm at the Hospital"

"Hospital? What happened?"

"Elliot Grey had a heart attack. I'm here with Christian and Kate. Dad, is mom okay?"

"She says she's ok. I'll fly to see her in a few hours. Please Annie, stay safe. I'll call you when I'm with her. She needs to calm down ok? I'll call you"

"Ok. Dad please take care of her"

"I will. Be safe sweetie"

Omg...Bob hit my mom? What the hell is going on?

"Ana? Ana. What's wrong?"

Christian is staring at me with concern in his face. And Kate is suddenly awake and alert to what I'm saying.

"Bob hit my mother"

"What?"

They say in unison!

"He hit her. I don't now what happened. It was my dad calling. He asked me to stay away from Bob"

"Omg! Ana, is she ok?"

"I don't know Kate. Dad said she was ok but I don't know. What is wrong with Bob?"

"He hit your mother Ana. You'll be far away from that jackass. I won't let him get close to you and hurt you too"

Christian looks pissed and it scares me a bit. I know he's just trying to protect me but he can get so dark sometimes, it's just scary...

"I don't understand. He never did anything like this. Never"

"Oh fuck! With everything that has happened I completely forgot. Ana, before the accident, I went to your place looking for you. You were gone. There was a note in the kitchen counter saying that you left with Bob and the two of you were going to live together in the south. It wasn't your handwriting so I can only assume it was his. After all that happened to me and to you, I completely blanked out that information. I'm so sorry. I should have said something to your mother. Or Ray. I'm so sorry"

What?...What the hell...fuck my memory! I should remember this! My mother was hit because of me! He wanted...me? Why? Is he crazy? Is he on drugs or something? How could he fool us for so long?

"What? Grey! Why the fuck did you keep that to yourself all this time? It's Bob's fault Ana was in an accident in the first place then! He kidnapped her, she managed to run away and ended up losing her memory in a fucking car crash! The man is clearly insane!"

Kate is fuming now! Not sure at whom though...

"I'm sorry! But a lot of shit happened in the mean time, in case you haven't notice!"

"Jesus! Ana, we need to keep you safe! He's clearly unstable! God only knows what he can do if he finds you"

Kate is scared, probably as much as me...The last thing she needed was to fear for another life...

"He won't get close enough. I'll make sure of it."

Christian looks at me while saying those words and I'm scared and glad at the same time. He will keep me safe, that I know. My fear lies in the things he could do to make sure I was safe...I'm scared of his dark side, scared of what he might do to keep his promises towards me...


	31. Author's note!

**_Hi everyone!_**

**_I'm so sorry for the ridiculous delays but seriously, I don't know whether to keep writing this story or just give up entirely...Inspiration is not agreeing with me and I don't know if my story is different enough to be worthy of more chapters!_**

**_Please let me know if you want to read more, even if it's just one person I will keep writing and hopefully keeping it interesting for you to read! Send me a PM, because I will delete this little note if your response is positive and replace it with a new chapter!_**

**_Love you all and thank you for taking the time to read and hopefully enjoy my story! ;)_**


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